Giving money to the grandkids when you don't speak to parents?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That was kind of rude of your niece to tell you her preference on how to receive the money. If you are doing checks do them all in checks for better record keeping. It’s not going to kill her to go to a bank.

Checks in the mail get stolen all the time, esp in MoCo. Look up the big stolen checks lawsuit right now the Feds busted. They’d pull the mail, open things for checks, add some zeros and put their fake LLC name also in the TO line and cash it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The more OP talks, the more she sounds like a troll.

+1 They seem to have an obsession on this topic, and keep posting new threads as different family members:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/300/1294529.page
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1295104.page

Thx 4 the fake troll post troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The more OP talks, the more she sounds like a troll.

+1 They seem to have an obsession on this topic, and keep posting new threads as different family members:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/300/1294529.page
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1295104.page

Oh goodness… Weirdos all over.

And split second sock puppeting. Nice!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just be aware that you are risking even more damaging your relationships with your sibling. I personally wouldn’t bypass their parents.

If they are over 18 there is nothing improper in bypassing the parents and treating them like adults.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would write everyone a letter establishing your durable power of attorney and that annual cash gifts are part of a comprehensive estate plan approved by a financial planner. Then just cut the checks. If the recipients are adults, you don’t need to do anything else. I would personally want to inform the parents barring a really good reason not to, but I don’t think you have an obligation to do that if they’re not minors.

+1

[Anonymous]

Do you and your sibling divide the inheritance essentially equally when your parents pass? What do the estate docs say?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:TLDR: I'm in charge of my remaining parent's money since they have dementia. I will distribute some of this money to my own children and want to be fair and distribute to nephews and nieces but don't speak with their parents much anymore. What's the best way to let the adult children know about the gift? I would need their bank account and routing number to transfer the money to them.

Background:

1. Parent has way more than enough to pay for their assisted living and will never need Medicaid.
2. Their financial advisor has approved giving these gifts.
3. We have maxed what we can give to adult children so now I am thinking it's time to share with grandchildren.
4. It's advantageous to give this money to reduce the estate taxes.

I do not speak much at all to the parent of the adult nephew and adult niece. They are college age, and I prefer to deal with them directly instead of their gaslighting, mentally ill parent.

Advice?

What do you mean by “in charge” of your parent’s money? You referred to yourself as an executor in a later post, but that doesn’t give you power over their finances while they are still living. Are there legal documents in place? Are you a trustee only? If you’re not the POA, who is signing off on distributing non-trust assets?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:TLDR: I'm in charge of my remaining parent's money since they have dementia. I will distribute some of this money to my own children and want to be fair and distribute to nephews and nieces but don't speak with their parents much anymore. What's the best way to let the adult children know about the gift? I would need their bank account and routing number to transfer the money to them.

Background:

1. Parent has way more than enough to pay for their assisted living and will never need Medicaid.
2. Their financial advisor has approved giving these gifts.
3. We have maxed what we can give to adult children so now I am thinking it's time to share with grandchildren.
4. It's advantageous to give this money to reduce the estate taxes.

I do not speak much at all to the parent of the adult nephew and adult niece. They are college age, and I prefer to deal with them directly instead of their gaslighting, mentally ill parent.

Advice?

What do you mean by “in charge” of your parent’s money? You referred to yourself as an executor in a later post, but that doesn’t give you power over their finances while they are still living. Are there legal documents in place? Are you a trustee only? If you’re not the POA, who is signing off on distributing non-trust assets?

This makes no sense as you are not the executor until death so the parents should do this. They are stealing money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The more OP talks, the more she sounds like a troll.

+1 They seem to have an obsession on this topic, and keep posting new threads as different family members:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/300/1294529.page
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1295104.page

Thx 4 the fake troll post troll.

Nice going OP. That certainly confirms you are trolling us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The more OP talks, the more she sounds like a troll.

+1 They seem to have an obsession on this topic, and keep posting new threads as different family members:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/300/1294529.page
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1295104.page

Thx 4 the fake troll post troll.

Good catch!