WWYD? Family history event vs. intense 10th grade classes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Given the facts about the parents’ Green Cards and what’s going on with people entering the country, I would absolutely not let her go.

If something happens to her, the parents cannot go to her.

I’d also worry that (while unlikely) if she has problems abroad or on entry into the US, she will bring unwanted government attention to her non-citizen parents.

Finally, even though she’s a citizen, I would not trust that things will just go smoothly at the border. I would be very uncomfortable having a minor child enter the country alone right now—x100 if she’s not white.

OP does not say her child is a citizen. That’s a big assumption. Kid is in 10th grade so between 14 and 16. It’s unlikely she was born in the US because it doesn’t take that long to get a green card. Kid is unlikely a citizen.

OP very clearly said her daughter is a U.S citizen.

[Anonymous]

OP here.

Both my kids are US citizens. My husband and I are waiting on our green card application and cannot leave the US until it's approved or denied. My kids are free to travel abroad.

Interesting about the jet lag: you think she's less likely to suffer from it with a shorter trip? It's true the event is on a weekend, so she could, in theory, miss less school. I was just thinking it would be even more tiring, but maybe not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seems odd that neither you and your husband can’t make something so important but you want to send your busy high schooler. Plus it sounds like she’s not that keen anyway. Let her stay home. The other adult going can record the ceremony to share with the family.

OP here. Not odd - we're applying for our green card and are not allowed to leave the US while it's processing. Otherwise I'd go!

I just posted and then read this. No way should you send your minor child out of the country if you are not yet a citizen. There is a lot of craziness going on. I would be afraid she could have trouble getting back into the country.

OP here. But she's a US citizen. She shouldn't have any problems, right?

Well if she does, you won’t be able to help her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seems odd that neither you and your husband can’t make something so important but you want to send your busy high schooler. Plus it sounds like she’s not that keen anyway. Let her stay home. The other adult going can record the ceremony to share with the family.

OP here. Not odd - we're applying for our green card and are not allowed to leave the US while it's processing. Otherwise I'd go!

Both of you are applying?

Are you subject to Trump's EO
making your daughter not a citizen and this subject to deportation or refusal of re-entry?

https://www.aila.org/library/president-trump-signs-executive-order-protecting-the-meaning-and-value-of-american-citizenship

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Given the facts about the parents’ Green Cards and what’s going on with people entering the country, I would absolutely not let her go.

If something happens to her, the parents cannot go to her.

I’d also worry that (while unlikely) if she has problems abroad or on entry into the US, she will bring unwanted government attention to her non-citizen parents.

Finally, even though she’s a citizen, I would not trust that things will just go smoothly at the border. I would be very uncomfortable having a minor child enter the country alone right now—x100 if she’s not white.

OP does not say her child is a citizen. That’s a big assumption. Kid is in 10th grade so between 14 and 16. It’s unlikely she was born in the US because it doesn’t take that long to get a green card. Kid is unlikely a citizen.

OP very clearly said her daughter is a U.S citizen.

And Donald Trump said very clearly that her daughter isn't.

[Anonymous]

If the kid wants to go, send her for sure! In the great scheme of things, missing a week of high school is very doable, easier than missing a week of college, or a week of work, but all of those are doable too. In contrast, the experience will not present itself again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP here.

Both my kids are US citizens. My husband and I are waiting on our green card application and cannot leave the US until it's approved or denied. My kids are free to travel abroad.

Interesting about the jet lag: you think she's less likely to suffer from it with a shorter trip? It's true the event is on a weekend, so she could, in theory, miss less school. I was just thinking it would be even more tiring, but maybe not?

As someone who has always traveled a lot, jet lag wasn't a thing when I was in high school or college. I easily adjusted to time zones. I fell asleep quickly on airplanes too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP here.

Both my kids are US citizens. My husband and I are waiting on our green card application and cannot leave the US until it's approved or denied. My kids are free to travel abroad.

Interesting about the jet lag: you think she's less likely to suffer from it with a shorter trip? It's true the event is on a weekend, so she could, in theory, miss less school. I was just thinking it would be even more tiring, but maybe not?

Do not send her. While I doubt she would be stopped or flagged when reentering, I wouldn’t take risk. How do you have a 15 yr US citizen daughter and a son even older that is a citizen, yet the both of you don’t even have green cards yet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leave it up to her. It can’t be that important if you aren’t even going.

This. One event is not going to return her to her roots. Plus, if she really is taking that hard of a load, it should be up to her to decide if she wants to miss out on content.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leave it up to her. It can’t be that important if you aren’t even going.

This. If you aren't going with her, not sure I would push her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP here.

Both my kids are US citizens. My husband and I are waiting on our green card application and cannot leave the US until it's approved or denied. My kids are free to travel abroad.

Interesting about the jet lag: you think she's less likely to suffer from it with a shorter trip? It's true the event is on a weekend, so she could, in theory, miss less school. I was just thinking it would be even more tiring, but maybe not?

You are really overthinking this. Kids are resilient and a little jet lag won’t matter. What matters is if your daughter wants to fly alone and if she wants to go.

I had my kids miss 2 days in the fall to travel to a destination wedding. The entire family was there and they wanted to go. They coordinated with teachers and made up assignments. It was fine.

My daughter already informed me homecoming is on Sept 27 this year. I know she would not be okay missing that. My other kid wouldn’t care. Are there school events your daughter cares about? Is she involved in any fall sports or band? Like it or not, these events might be more important than a once in a lifetime family event with relatives she doesn’t really know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP here.

Both my kids are US citizens. My husband and I are waiting on our green card application and cannot leave the US until it's approved or denied. My kids are free to travel abroad.

Interesting about the jet lag: you think she's less likely to suffer from it with a shorter trip? It's true the event is on a weekend, so she could, in theory, miss less school. I was just thinking it would be even more tiring, but maybe not?

So you have a college aged son that is a U.S. citizen, and somehow you and spouse don’t even have green cards yet? Something doesn’t add up

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP here.

Both my kids are US citizens. My husband and I are waiting on our green card application and cannot leave the US until it's approved or denied. My kids are free to travel abroad.

Interesting about the jet lag: you think she's less likely to suffer from it with a shorter trip? It's true the event is on a weekend, so she could, in theory, miss less school. I was just thinking it would be even more tiring, but maybe not?

So you have a college aged son that is a U.S. citizen, and somehow you and spouse don’t even have green cards yet? Something doesn’t add up

+1. Huh?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP here.

Both my kids are US citizens. My husband and I are waiting on our green card application and cannot leave the US until it's approved or denied. My kids are free to travel abroad.

Interesting about the jet lag: you think she's less likely to suffer from it with a shorter trip? It's true the event is on a weekend, so she could, in theory, miss less school. I was just thinking it would be even more tiring, but maybe not?

So you have a college aged son that is a U.S. citizen, and somehow you and spouse don’t even have green cards yet? Something doesn’t add up

Not OP but my FIL had a green card for decades before becoming a citizen around age 60. All of his children were adults by then. I believe one of the factors was that his native country did not allow dual citizenship, but there may have been others. I don't think OP's situation is sketchy at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP here.

Both my kids are US citizens. My husband and I are waiting on our green card application and cannot leave the US until it's approved or denied. My kids are free to travel abroad.

Interesting about the jet lag: you think she's less likely to suffer from it with a shorter trip? It's true the event is on a weekend, so she could, in theory, miss less school. I was just thinking it would be even more tiring, but maybe not?

So you have a college aged son that is a U.S. citizen, and somehow you and spouse don’t even have green cards yet? Something doesn’t add up

+1. Huh?

OP here. My husband and I have been living in the US for decades on a series of work visas and our kids were born here. We have only recently started the process of getting green cards and possibly, down the road, US citizenship. In the past, this did not seem important to us. We are citizens of a European country, and were not in any rush to add another citizenship. We could not predict how dire the political situation was going to become.

We know a lot of international families on visas in our same situation, coming from first-world countries and in no rush to become US citizens. Everyone could move about freely on their visas without fear of detention or deportation.
Previously none of this mattered until this administration made it a point of contention.