article in The Atlantic about tracking your kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just like everything, you can abuse it or you can use it.

The article talks about a parent who has their kids class schedule and causing yells at them when they’re not in class. Clearly that’s an abuse..

This wasn’t in the article, but my son is part of a sports team and a bunch of parents got a call in the middle of the night saying they were in jail and needed to send money. They track their kids so they looked it up and saw their kids were not in jail. This is a good use of the tracking app.

The only time I tracked my kids when they were driving home from high school so I could figure out what time dinner was cause I didn’t like calling them because I don’t like them using their phone when they drive. And of course they would forget to text me. They were leaving school.

It’s not the technology that’s the problem. It’s just how people use it.

Your last line is true for so many things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's the big deal about parents knowing where their kids are? That's pretty basic for parenting.

1. College students aren't kids.
2. Teens need some freedom to diverge from parents. This is healthy.
3. Small children- yes - know where they are.

Asian?

1. Biologically they are and they share their location with their 100 closest friends so...
2. Having find my phone on does not mean they don't diverge from parents.
3. Small children should not have a phone.

Old?

1. If they can fight for their country, and get tried as an adult, they are legally considered adults.
2. Agree - that's different than tracking.
3. Agree - still you should know where small children are - which was the statement.

A$$hole? Let me answer for you - yes.

And, I'm 45 - is that old? Sure to some, not to others. I'm old enough to have experience to chime in on this conversation, young enough to know that some parents in my kids cohort are airtagging their kids, which I think is insane. You should not have to air tag a young child, they need to be properly supervised.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't and have never tracked my 3 teen/YA boys. Seems super weird to me. And I would never want them tracking me. Also weird.

You don’t want to be a responsible parent ?

Not sure when tracking technology became a requirement for being a 'responsible parent'.

+1
Responsible parent = building trust
Tracking parent = "I don't trust you"

It's not about trust, it's about safety. I don't look at it unless I have a specific concern (almost never).

Oh? You don't trust your kids to make decisions that keep them safe. I do. It is about trust.

Side note - do your elderly parents trust you to keep yourself safe? When did they shift from not trusting you to trusting you? In my family it is incremental from teens to adulthood. It always has been.

DP, but ha— my mom and I share our locations with each other. It has nothing to do with trust. A few times a year we look at it when one of us is traveling or something (eg, has the flight landed yet?).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't and have never tracked my 3 teen/YA boys. Seems super weird to me. And I would never want them tracking me. Also weird.

You don’t want to be a responsible parent ?

Not sure when tracking technology became a requirement for being a 'responsible parent'.

+1
Responsible parent = building trust
Tracking parent = "I don't trust you"

It's not about trust, it's about safety. I don't look at it unless I have a specific concern (almost never).

Oh? You don't trust your kids to make decisions that keep them safe. I do. It is about trust.

Side note - do your elderly parents trust you to keep yourself safe? When did they shift from not trusting you to trusting you? In my family it is incremental from teens to adulthood. It always has been.

DP, but ha— my mom and I share our locations with each other. It has nothing to do with trust. A few times a year we look at it when one of us is traveling or something (eg, has the flight landed yet?).

Yeah, that's a different conversation. That's more like kids sharing locations with each other. This conversation was about parent checking to see if their young adults were seated in the lecture hall at university and following the schedule the parents set out for them. Completely different than checking to see if mom is in Italy or France.

[Anonymous]

I'm not going to stop tracking my kids while they are using devices and vehicles/transportation we pay for. I don't constantly monitor them but I do check on them if they seem to be running late to estimate when they will be home etc. They can track me if they want. The kids also share their locations with their friends - which I have more mixed feelings about but if they can share with friends they can certainly share with their parents! Funny enough I recently started sharing locations with my Dad. He's 80 and I was a little concerned about him making long drives. He uses it the most and will ask me what we were doing in xyz location or check to see if I'm home before he calls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not going to stop tracking my kids while they are using devices and vehicles/transportation we pay for. I don't constantly monitor them but I do check on them if they seem to be running late to estimate when they will be home etc. They can track me if they want. The kids also share their locations with their friends - which I have more mixed feelings about but if they can share with friends they can certainly share with their parents! Funny enough I recently started sharing locations with my Dad. He's 80 and I was a little concerned about him making long drives. He uses it the most and will ask me what we were doing in xyz location or check to see if I'm home before he calls.

You do you. You are in fact the only person who will have to deal with the consequences of your actions.

[Anonymous]

This kind of tracking genuinely creeps me out. I would never do it.

And I'm also not above telling the kids to figure things out for themselves, rather than calling me to tell them what to do when they are faced with an unusual or uncomfortable situation.

[Anonymous]

We can see each other's locations in the family, and it really cuts down on stupid "where are you?" texts.

[Anonymous]

I love it. It eliminates so much useless communication. If I am picking up a kid, they can tell I'm on the way and not worry. If I need to know if my spouse is home or at the office so I will know whether to go home and feed the dog, I can just check without texting/calling. When my high schoolers are out, I can see whether they are on the way home, etc.

[Anonymous]

I like having tracking available for my 3 teens.

It is handy at times for family logistical reasons.

Good to have if needed for safety.

And I really don’t sit and monitor my kids’ every move. The only time I really look at it is when something unique or unusual is going on. For example- DD driving to a nearby city 2hrs away for the first time etc. I like to know she arrived safely. I am rarely interested in the day to day stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't and have never tracked my 3 teen/YA boys. Seems super weird to me. And I would never want them tracking me. Also weird.

You don’t want to be a responsible parent ?

Not sure when tracking technology became a requirement for being a 'responsible parent'.

+1
Responsible parent = building trust
Tracking parent = "I don't trust you"

It's not about trust, it's about safety. I don't look at it unless I have a specific concern (almost never).

Oh? You don't trust your kids to make decisions that keep them safe. I do. It is about trust.

Side note - do your elderly parents trust you to keep yourself safe? When did they shift from not trusting you to trusting you? In my family it is incremental from teens to adulthood. It always has been.

So security through obscurity. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

DD14 and I use Life360.

I look at it literally almost never, to the point I forget that I have it. But for those random situations, like I need to go somewhere and it would help to know if she was going to make it home before it's time for me to leave..... amazing. And God forbid there was a problem, it would be beyond helpful.

She checks where I am a lot more often. But still not a ton. It comforts her.

[Anonymous]

I have 2 families in Life 360 (parents have androids kids apple), my spouse and kids, and another one for my siblings and elderly parents.

For our kids, it started as a way to know when they were coming back for logistics (to pick them up, to have dinner ready, etc). I never look "just because," and most of the time forget it's there, but now, when they are driving home from college (long drive), I again look to see how soon they'll be home. Spouse occasionally looks and he will tell me, Larla is in class or Larlo is at Chipotle.

My elderly parents requested to be on it after they heard about it from a friend in AL. They can track me and my siblings, and we can track them. I have never checked where they are (not driving, so chances are they are at the AL facility). I have no idea if they look where I am, nor do I care

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's the big deal about parents knowing where their kids are? That's pretty basic for parenting.

1. College students aren't kids.
2. Teens need some freedom to diverge from parents. This is healthy.
3. Small children- yes - know where they are.

Asian?

1. Biologically they are and they share their location with their 100 closest friends so...
2. Having find my phone on does not mean they don't diverge from parents.
3. Small children should not have a phone.

Old?

1. If they can fight for their country, and get tried as an adult, they are legally considered adults.
2. Agree - that's different than tracking.
3. Agree - still you should know where small children are - which was the statement.

A$$hole? Let me answer for you - yes.

And, I'm 45 - is that old? Sure to some, not to others. I'm old enough to have experience to chime in on this conversation, young enough to know that some parents in my kids cohort are airtagging their kids, which I think is insane. You should not have to air tag a young child, they need to be properly supervised.

They should not be fighting at 18 it was rare until Vietnam it was mostly 25 for ww2 and before.

Yes u are old and the world is different,

If u think find my phone is air tagging I can’t help u

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love it. It eliminates so much useless communication. If I am picking up a kid, they can tell I'm on the way and not worry. If I need to know if my spouse is home or at the office so I will know whether to go home and feed the dog, I can just check without texting/calling. When my high schoolers are out, I can see whether they are on the way home, etc.

This. Half the parents in here say "we don't track our kids. They tell us where they're going every time they leave."

We use the tracking feature so our older kids never have to tell us where they are. my junior and senior leave the house and are like "see you mom. I'll be home at 11pm." they get complete freedom because I can find them if absolutely needed but otherwise they're on their own for 4, 6, 8, 10 hours.