Youth group leader commenting on daughters height

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What kind of youth group is this? Your church? Young Life? My HS friend joined this club called Campus Crusaders and they wouldn't let the girls wear bathing suits without tee shirts on a beach trip b/c it would make the boys think bad thoughts. I NEVER had that experience in Young Life, FWIW.

My kids are going to a camp with similar rules. They are for both genders but seem to apply more to the girls, just because it's harder to find modest but stylish summer clothes for girls. My kids only attend because it's a connection to their heritage and I want them to have the experience of being with kids of similar backgrounds.

I have kids of both genders, and we talk extensively about the rules beforehand. What the rules are, why the camp thought they needed them (i.e., what misguided religious concepts led them to think that), what's not fair about it. I also told them I will support them 100% - they get to decide if they want to follow the dress code. I will support them and speak up for them if they don't want to, even if that means they get in trouble, have to leave, etc. So far, they just follow it, but they know to roll their eyes at any comments and know that the reasons we send them to that camp have nothing to do with the dress code. They enjoy spending time with the other kids, so it's worth it for them and us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I find the post that you wrote about your daughter very odd and weird. What does her being developed and pretty have to do with anything? What was the point in mentioning that? And she dresses her body well? What does that even mean? Gross

Agree. How you are describing your 12 yr olds appearance is off to me. Add what is a Loveshack fancy golden goose style even mean? Is your 12 yr old wearing $500 sneakers and $300 casual dresses? If so, you are creating a monster. This plus creepy youth group and all sorts of disfunction and entitlement is headed your way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“Please stop commenting on my daughter’s body, clothes and looks. It’s very inappropriate.”

+1000000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I find the post that you wrote about your daughter very odd and weird. What does her being developed and pretty have to do with anything? What was the point in mentioning that? And she dresses her body well? What does that even mean? Gross

Agree. How you are describing your 12 yr olds appearance is off to me. Add what is a Loveshack fancy golden goose style even mean? Is your 12 yr old wearing $500 sneakers and $300 casual dresses? If so, you are creating a monster. This plus creepy youth group and all sorts of disfunction and entitlement is headed your way.

It’s meant to say she is preppy and not trashy. It should be irrelevant though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I find the post that you wrote about your daughter very odd and weird. What does her being developed and pretty have to do with anything? What was the point in mentioning that? And she dresses her body well? What does that even mean? Gross

Yes, both mother and youth leader appear to be sexualizing this girl.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I find the post that you wrote about your daughter very odd and weird. What does her being developed and pretty have to do with anything? What was the point in mentioning that? And she dresses her body well? What does that even mean? Gross

Agree. How you are describing your 12 yr olds appearance is off to me. Add what is a Loveshack fancy golden goose style even mean? Is your 12 yr old wearing $500 sneakers and $300 casual dresses? If so, you are creating a monster. This plus creepy youth group and all sorts of disfunction and entitlement is headed your way.

It’s meant to say she is preppy and not trashy. It should be irrelevant though.

These aren’t preppy looks, just trendy and expensive looks (and frankly, passé by now).

[Anonymous]

Pull her out immediately and talk to the higher ups, this is so weird!!!

[Anonymous]

Gross.

I would protect my daughter and remove her from Youth group and file a complaint. The complaint probably won't go anywhere but it's important that your daughter know you are not punishing her and it's not her fault.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I find the post that you wrote about your daughter very odd and weird. What does her being developed and pretty have to do with anything? What was the point in mentioning that? And she dresses her body well? What does that even mean? Gross

Agree. How you are describing your 12 yr olds appearance is off to me. Add what is a Loveshack fancy golden goose style even mean? Is your 12 yr old wearing $500 sneakers and $300 casual dresses? If so, you are creating a monster. This plus creepy youth group and all sorts of disfunction and entitlement is headed your way.

It’s meant to say she is preppy and not trashy. It should be irrelevant though.

So there are two styles of dress now, preppy and trashy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some of these comments are inappropriate and others are truth telling.

2inch inseam shorts look very different on a 5’ girl vs a 5’9” girl. Just like a sheath dress looks very different on an A cup woman vs a DD cup woman. It is what it is and more women and girls need to know this.

The comments about wanting her body type are inappropriate.

The shorts things doesn’t make sense to me. A 2-inch inseam is covering the same parts regardless of how tall or short you are. Everything else is just leg.

They do look different. For a 12 year old 130 lbs is full figured for 5’9”. Filling out usually happens in late teen

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is 12 and just started youth group , and one of the women leaders has made multiple comments about her height. She’s 5’9 and 130 lbs so small framed and is developed for her age and very pretty by all standards, and knows how to dress her body well. But doesn’t dress inappropriately, no crop tops or anything. Has a very preppy lululemon loveshack golden goose sense of style. But this one women has told her that people look at her more because she’s tall, she can’t wear shorts because it draws the wrong attention to her, that she has to act like a role model to her peers because she’s tall, and has even made comments to me that she wished she had my daughters body. I personally found this so weird and I can tell it makes my daughter uncomfortable. Wwyd?

What's the problem? She looks like an adult and adults are treating her more like one, as obviously do her peers. Time to grow up emotionally for her also to match the body, and be a young lady.

Eww

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of youth group is this? Your church? Young Life? My HS friend joined this club called Campus Crusaders and they wouldn't let the girls wear bathing suits without tee shirts on a beach trip b/c it would make the boys think bad thoughts. I NEVER had that experience in Young Life, FWIW.

My kids are going to a camp with similar rules. They are for both genders but seem to apply more to the girls, just because it's harder to find modest but stylish summer clothes for girls. My kids only attend because it's a connection to their heritage and I want them to have the experience of being with kids of similar backgrounds.

I have kids of both genders, and we talk extensively about the rules beforehand. What the rules are, why the camp thought they needed them (i.e., what misguided religious concepts led them to think that), what's not fair about it. I also told them I will support them 100% - they get to decide if they want to follow the dress code. I will support them and speak up for them if they don't want to, even if that means they get in trouble, have to leave, etc. So far, they just follow it, but they know to roll their eyes at any comments and know that the reasons we send them to that camp have nothing to do with the dress code. They enjoy spending time with the other kids, so it's worth it for them and us.

Omg you are crappy parents
Absolutely utterly pathetic

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I find the post that you wrote about your daughter very odd and weird. What does her being developed and pretty have to do with anything? What was the point in mentioning that? And she dresses her body well? What does that even mean? Gross

Yes, both mother and youth leader appear to be sexualizing this girl.

Yep this

What mother lets her daughter ever return to this crap?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is 12 and just started youth group , and one of the women leaders has made multiple comments about her height. She’s 5’9 and 130 lbs so small framed and is developed for her age and very pretty by all standards, and knows how to dress her body well. But doesn’t dress inappropriately, no crop tops or anything. Has a very preppy lululemon loveshack golden goose sense of style. But this one women has told her that people look at her more because she’s tall, she can’t wear shorts because it draws the wrong attention to her, that she has to act like a role model to her peers because she’s tall, and has even made comments to me that she wished she had my daughters body. I personally found this so weird and I can tell it makes my daughter uncomfortable. Wwyd?

What's the problem? She looks like an adult and adults are treating her more like one, as obviously do her peers. Time to grow up emotionally for her also to match the body, and be a young lady.

Eww

Guessing you smother your kids and keep them locked up like Norman Bate's mom would!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I find the post that you wrote about your daughter very odd and weird. What does her being developed and pretty have to do with anything? What was the point in mentioning that? And she dresses her body well? What does that even mean? Gross

Agree. How you are describing your 12 yr olds appearance is off to me. Add what is a Loveshack fancy golden goose style even mean? Is your 12 yr old wearing $500 sneakers and $300 casual dresses? If so, you are creating a monster. This plus creepy youth group and all sorts of disfunction and entitlement is headed your way.

It’s meant to say she is preppy and not trashy. It should be irrelevant though.

These aren’t preppy looks, just trendy and expensive looks (and frankly, passé by now).

Holy mother of god, wake up.