10 year old never gets invited to playdates/birthday parties

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a third grade boy in a similar situation. One birthday party all year and no playdates aside from ringing neighborhood kids doorbells. I was asking him about it last week. He has a group of 5 kids or so he plays with at recess and eats lunch with, but said only two of them do playdates together because they live in the same neighborhood. It sounded like playdates aren't not a big thing and he said he is happy the way things are right now. Maybe he's a loner but just typing what he told me.

I think this is on the parents. I always felt like it was my job to foster these friendships early on with other families.

What exactly is "on the parents" if the kid is not bothered by lack of playdates and otherwise has plenty of friends outside of school? It sounds incredibly common as per other responses on this thread.

Also as kids get older, friend circles change through MS and HS. I personally was not friends with the same kids in 4th grade vs 8th grade vs 12th grade. A lot of my 12th grade friends didn't even live in the area in 4th grade so I'm skeptical that parents planning a bunch of playdates at an early age is some super critical thing.