Why do men go to routine prenatal appointments?

[Anonymous]

Ultrasounds aren’t healthy for the baby anyway so I wouldn’t be jealous of that unless they are absolutely needed. More isn’t always better.

[Anonymous]

DH here and I went to almost every one for three kids. We were older parents, so there were ultrasounds almost every time (a couple things to watch but fortunately nothing that didn't resolve on it's own). I did enjoy the ultrasounds and being a part of the excitement. I think DW assumed that was why I was there, but the underlying reason was that pregnancy was quite an emotional rollercoaster for her and I wanted to make sure I was there with her if there were any issues. Fortunately there were not and, yes, it was a lot of driving for short appointments.

[Anonymous]

With the midwives - the appt is longer and a bit more holistic. It's always fun to hear the heartbeat. My husband came to some, not all because it was just a nice experience. My son and husband were at my last appt the night before my 2nd was born.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of the time they are so quick and not much happens. Is it so they can hear the babies heartbeat? In case something bad happens I.e. babies heartbeat isn’t heard? Some appointments seem more important I.e. pregnancy confirmation, ultrasounds and some appointments toward the end as by then it gets hard for some women to drive. My husband would have a hard time taking off for every appointment. He keeps asking if he should come but for me it doesn’t seem needed. Sometimes my appointments are 5-10 mins.

Because as a first time dad (or second or third), they are excited too and want to be a part of the process

[Anonymous]

With my first DH came to all my appointments because it was fun! And then we’d get lunch afterwards (or before) and discussed baby things.

With my second he came maybe a third of the time, just the big appointments with tests.

With my next he didn’t come and at a routine second trimester appointment there was no heartbeat. Man I wish he had been there. He rushed from work while I waited and they scheduled an emergency d&c and being alone for those 45 minutes were the hardest of my life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ultrasounds aren’t healthy for the baby anyway so I wouldn’t be jealous of that unless they are absolutely needed. More isn’t always better.

Ultrasound uses sound not any sort of rays for imaging. They don't affect the baby.

https://www.marchofdimes.org/find-support/topics/pregnancy/ultrasound-during-pregnancy#:~:text=Does%20ultrasound%20have%20any%20risks,not%20found%20any%20dangerous%20risks.

[Anonymous]

First time parents

Going to appointments together sounds like what you do as a husband if you want to be a good dad and are excited about the new baby.

Neither the mom or the dad have any experience or know what to except from these appointments so there’s an element of curiosity too. My husband went with me for the above reasons. We both felt it was a waste of time so he didn’t go again until the anatomy scan to see the ultrasound. That was a fun appointment.

[Anonymous]

I was pretty anxious with my first pregnancy and DH just came without question. He wanted to be involved and hear what was going on and it wasn't a big deal for him to take an hour off work or whatever. With my second, he wasn't planning to come except for the big ones, but then I had major bleeding and the anxiety shot back up. So he came to most of the appointments for my second, too, to hear that heartbeat!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With my first DH came to all my appointments because it was fun! And then we’d get lunch afterwards (or before) and discussed baby things.

With my second he came maybe a third of the time, just the big appointments with tests.

With my next he didn’t come and at a routine second trimester appointment there was no heartbeat. Man I wish he had been there. He rushed from work while I waited and they scheduled an emergency d&c and being alone for those 45 minutes were the hardest of my life.

Ugh I’m so sorry. I do think anyone that’s judgmental of dads coming has never been in a situation where there’s been something unexpected. Nothing is harder than calling your husband to tell them that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For people who got to have an ultrasound with every appointment, how did you get that? I have always been baffled by the fact that the vast majority of the prenatal appointments are just chats, a urine test and Doppler (with an occasional blood test). It seems useless for actually checking on baby’s health, since the heartbeat is the last thing to go if baby is in distress. As for mom’s health, you can do a protein dipstick at home and there are at home pressure cuffs to check for preeclampsia.

So I don’t really see the point of in office visits other than actual imaging(ultrasounds), non stress tests or blood draws, which are not done at every appointment.


In line with that, hubby comes to the apts with ultrasound and hasn’t come to the others.

I’ve had a different OB for three pregnancies due to retirements and moving and two of the three did ultrasounds each time. The one who didn’t was by far the worst doctor and way less engaged and “by the book” than my other two. It takes 10 seconds longer to set up than the heartbeat machine and provides so much potentially crucial information. Id never go back to a doctor who doesn’t do regular scans him/herself because it says a lot about the doctor and how they practice medicine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ultrasounds aren’t healthy for the baby anyway so I wouldn’t be jealous of that unless they are absolutely needed. More isn’t always better.

Ultrasound uses sound not any sort of rays for imaging. They don't affect the baby.

https://www.marchofdimes.org/find-support/topics/pregnancy/ultrasound-during-pregnancy#:~:text=Does%20ultrasound%20have%20any%20risks,not%20found%20any%20dangerous%20risks.

Yeah … keep telling yourself that

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For people who got to have an ultrasound with every appointment, how did you get that? I have always been baffled by the fact that the vast majority of the prenatal appointments are just chats, a urine test and Doppler (with an occasional blood test). It seems useless for actually checking on baby’s health, since the heartbeat is the last thing to go if baby is in distress. As for mom’s health, you can do a protein dipstick at home and there are at home pressure cuffs to check for preeclampsia.

So I don’t really see the point of in office visits other than actual imaging(ultrasounds), non stress tests or blood draws, which are not done at every appointment.


In line with that, hubby comes to the apts with ultrasound and hasn’t come to the others.

I’ve had a different OB for three pregnancies due to retirements and moving and two of the three did ultrasounds each time. The one who didn’t was by far the worst doctor and way less engaged and “by the book” than my other two. It takes 10 seconds longer to set up than the heartbeat machine and provides so much potentially crucial information. Id never go back to a doctor who doesn’t do regular scans him/herself because it says a lot about the doctor and how they practice medicine.

Really depends on your age and past history. Lots of scans isn’t the norm. It doesn’t indicate how good a doctor is… more isn’t better. It’s not McDonald’s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ultrasounds aren’t healthy for the baby anyway so I wouldn’t be jealous of that unless they are absolutely needed. More isn’t always better.

Ultrasound uses sound not any sort of rays for imaging. They don't affect the baby.

https://www.marchofdimes.org/find-support/topics/pregnancy/ultrasound-during-pregnancy#:~:text=Does%20ultrasound%20have%20any%20risks,not%20found%20any%20dangerous%20risks.

Yeah … keep telling yourself that

You sound stupid.

Where is your link?

I'm the AMA who wrote previously about having twins. Had one scan a week entering third trimester. They went full term vaginal birth and came out st 7 lbs and some ounces each. Both came home with no time in NICU. They're 14 now and really couldn't be a better set of kids, even if they are teens

I know that's just one data set but you sound like you got your info off of TikTok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For people who got to have an ultrasound with every appointment, how did you get that? I have always been baffled by the fact that the vast majority of the prenatal appointments are just chats, a urine test and Doppler (with an occasional blood test). It seems useless for actually checking on baby’s health, since the heartbeat is the last thing to go if baby is in distress. As for mom’s health, you can do a protein dipstick at home and there are at home pressure cuffs to check for preeclampsia.

So I don’t really see the point of in office visits other than actual imaging(ultrasounds), non stress tests or blood draws, which are not done at every appointment.


In line with that, hubby comes to the apts with ultrasound and hasn’t come to the others.

I’ve had a different OB for three pregnancies due to retirements and moving and two of the three did ultrasounds each time. The one who didn’t was by far the worst doctor and way less engaged and “by the book” than my other two. It takes 10 seconds longer to set up than the heartbeat machine and provides so much potentially crucial information. Id never go back to a doctor who doesn’t do regular scans him/herself because it says a lot about the doctor and how they practice medicine.

Really depends on your age and past history. Lots of scans isn’t the norm. It doesn’t indicate how good a doctor is… more isn’t better. It’s not McDonald’s.

Trying to compare quality healthcare to McDonald’s is the moment the west went wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ultrasounds aren’t healthy for the baby anyway so I wouldn’t be jealous of that unless they are absolutely needed. More isn’t always better.

Found Robert F. Kennedy Jr.