Date with biglaw partner- what's the reality of their life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They travel. They are matched-up with an Administrative Assistant for travel, and it is assumed they will be having sex.

Omg, don’t fall for this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They travel. They are matched-up with an Administrative Assistant for travel, and it is assumed they will be having sex.

Yep, and/or hook up with co-workers, colleagues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They travel. They are matched-up with an Administrative Assistant for travel, and it is assumed they will be having sex.

….on a sad, bad tv show you watched. Sure. In real life, this would pose massive liability issues and so would never ever happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They travel. They are matched-up with an Administrative Assistant for travel, and it is assumed they will be having sex.

ya'll make up anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They travel. They are matched-up with an Administrative Assistant for travel, and it is assumed they will be having sex.

….on a sad, bad tv show you watched. Sure. In real life, this would pose massive liability issues and so would never ever happen.

The ones who do this are always a trainwreck anyway. It does happen from time to time and no one is surprised when it does, because the person is usually a walking red flag.

Most partners are risk-averse dorks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My BigLaw DH makes 10M a year and I could not be happier.

Oh. You again.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:My husband is great. He has his own clients and I think that’s tbe key. He spent years and years in government and would leave again if he had a position he wanted. Maybe that’s the key. He is balanced, great at his job, a rainmaker, handsome, a great dad. Seriously. He’s doing spectuactuarly at his firm income wise.

Lol

Sorry you’re bitter! It’s completely true.

I’m not bitter in the slightest. I’m laughing at the “handsome” part. As if that’s relevant. You sound like a Stepford Wife.

I’m sorry for you that you don’t care if your partner is handsome - sad and desperate. I’m not there, sorry.

Ah, ok, so you’re a troll. Just as I suspected. Thanks for clearing that up.

Seriously, you are a sad sack. A woman who is glad her husband is attractive and successful and a good dad is a troll to you. That says a lot about you and you’re clearly getting what you deserve out there. I’m no troll.

Except this isn’t a thread about what makes a perfect husband. It’s a thread about law firm partners and where the OP should expect to rank among his priorities.

In this context, the response is actually pretty telling. The poster says nothing about how the law firm partner treats HER or how THEIR relationship operates. It’s all about how good he is at his job, how much money he makes, what he looks like, and how he is as a dad. Nothing about how or where the partner values the poster. The OP should take note.

Well, if it makes you happy, he is also a really great partner. We’ve been together since law school and he is kind, considerate and thoughtful. He’s fun and funny and plans things for just us. My point was just that some of these guys are really good guys. Some aren’t. I’ve also worked with some real jerk run of the mill lawyers with a chip and those guys are worse, overall, I’d say.

NP. This is why you sound like you are making things up. You say he’s a great guy after like 5-6 posts? Not really believable.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:My husband is great. He has his own clients and I think that’s tbe key. He spent years and years in government and would leave again if he had a position he wanted. Maybe that’s the key. He is balanced, great at his job, a rainmaker, handsome, a great dad. Seriously. He’s doing spectuactuarly at his firm income wise.

Lol

Sorry you’re bitter! It’s completely true.

I’m not bitter in the slightest. I’m laughing at the “handsome” part. As if that’s relevant. You sound like a Stepford Wife.

I’m sorry for you that you don’t care if your partner is handsome - sad and desperate. I’m not there, sorry.

Ah, ok, so you’re a troll. Just as I suspected. Thanks for clearing that up.

Seriously, you are a sad sack. A woman who is glad her husband is attractive and successful and a good dad is a troll to you. That says a lot about you and you’re clearly getting what you deserve out there. I’m no troll.

Except this isn’t a thread about what makes a perfect husband. It’s a thread about law firm partners and where the OP should expect to rank among his priorities.

In this context, the response is actually pretty telling. The poster says nothing about how the law firm partner treats HER or how THEIR relationship operates. It’s all about how good he is at his job, how much money he makes, what he looks like, and how he is as a dad. Nothing about how or where the partner values the poster. The OP should take note.


Well, if it makes you happy, he is also a really great partner. We’ve been together since law school and he is kind, considerate and thoughtful. He’s fun and funny and plans things for just us. My point was just that some of these guys are really good guys. Some aren’t. I’ve also worked with some real jerk run of the mill lawyers with a chip and those guys are worse, overall, I’d say.

NP. This is why you sound like you are making things up. You say he’s a great guy after like 5-6 posts? Not really believable.

Leave the PP alone. She stated a fact: she's happy in her marriage and her DH is a great guy. Why are you challenging her statement? Come on, now.

I'm not married to a big law partner by any means, lol, but come on, be nice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:My husband is great. He has his own clients and I think that’s tbe key. He spent years and years in government and would leave again if he had a position he wanted. Maybe that’s the key. He is balanced, great at his job, a rainmaker, handsome, a great dad. Seriously. He’s doing spectuactuarly at his firm income wise.

Lol

Sorry you’re bitter! It’s completely true.

I’m not bitter in the slightest. I’m laughing at the “handsome” part. As if that’s relevant. You sound like a Stepford Wife.

I’m sorry for you that you don’t care if your partner is handsome - sad and desperate. I’m not there, sorry.

Ah, ok, so you’re a troll. Just as I suspected. Thanks for clearing that up.

Seriously, you are a sad sack. A woman who is glad her husband is attractive and successful and a good dad is a troll to you. That says a lot about you and you’re clearly getting what you deserve out there. I’m no troll.

Except this isn’t a thread about what makes a perfect husband. It’s a thread about law firm partners and where the OP should expect to rank among his priorities.

In this context, the response is actually pretty telling. The poster says nothing about how the law firm partner treats HER or how THEIR relationship operates. It’s all about how good he is at his job, how much money he makes, what he looks like, and how he is as a dad. Nothing about how or where the partner values the poster. The OP should take note.


Well, if it makes you happy, he is also a really great partner. We’ve been together since law school and he is kind, considerate and thoughtful. He’s fun and funny and plans things for just us. My point was just that some of these guys are really good guys. Some aren’t. I’ve also worked with some real jerk run of the mill lawyers with a chip and those guys are worse, overall, I’d say.

NP. This is why you sound like you are making things up. You say he’s a great guy after like 5-6 posts? Not really believable.

Leave the PP alone. She stated a fact: she's happy in her marriage and her DH is a great guy. Why are you challenging her statement? Come on, now.

I'm not married to a big law partner by any means, lol, but come on, be nice.

Many of us have spent day in and day out working with big law partners. We have reason to be skeptical.

[Anonymous]

Plenty of Biglaw partners who aren't narcissists, lol.

But I'll give you this story: A friend and I were working late on a motion. It was about 9pm. He got a text from a woman he was seeing, whom he'd had to cancel dinner with, and he was exasperated. He said "She says she doesn't feel like she's a part of my life. What life?!? We have no life." I laughed. Fortunately my DH is also a lawyer, so we understand each other's priorities and schedules.

So, moral of that story: Schedules can be rough. Are likely to be rough. You will not get anywhere near as much attention as you would from someone with a less demanding job. And he has kids? You will be behind them as well. So, if you are highly independent, it would work out well. If you are not, and are going to get upset if he can't make it to your friend Larla's party or whatever, it's probably not a good idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is great. He has his own clients and I think that’s tbe key. He spent years and years in government and would leave again if he had a position he wanted. Maybe that’s the key. He is balanced, great at his job, a rainmaker, handsome, a great dad. Seriously. He’s doing spectuactuarly at his firm income wise.

Lol

Sorry you’re bitter! It’s completely true.

I’m not bitter in the slightest. I’m laughing at the “handsome” part. As if that’s relevant. You sound like a Stepford Wife.

jealous^^. np

[Anonymous]

I wouldn’t fall for all this discouragement, OP. He may be a great guy or even just someone you enjoy casually spending time with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They travel. They are matched-up with an Administrative Assistant for travel, and it is assumed they will be having sex.

Yeah, no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They travel. They are matched-up with an Administrative Assistant for travel, and it is assumed they will be having sex.

Yep, and/or hook up with co-workers, colleagues.

That nonsense about being "matched-up with and Admin Assistant for travel, and it is assumed they will be having sex" is total nonsense. Talk about a lawsuit waiting to happen, lol.

But hooking up with co-workers and colleagues? That definitely does happen quite a bit. But only with the ones who are miserable in their relationships. Plenty of those, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t fall for all this discouragement, OP. He may be a great guy or even just someone you enjoy casually spending time with.

Agree with this. So he had a big profile job, and kids.

You also have kids, a home, and presumably your own job. If you are both on the same page about dating and sex, it can work out perfectly. Neither of you are top priority in the other's life, but that's fine, you aren't 25 years old and unburdened. Enjoy the date and your time together.