Avoidant Women

[Anonymous]

OP here. I met up with one of the avoidant women I mentioned. She's the most recent one to run out of my house after sex. We spent almost a whole day together. It was fantastic. She told me she's really scared and wants to slow it down, but she wants to keep seeing me. She said I'm easier to talk to than any man she's ever known, I understand her body better than any man she's ever known, and all of this is freaking her out. She said she didn't want to sleep over but she wants me to stay at her place sometime because she thinks that will be less scary. She admitted she was trying not to see me for a couple of weeks but she changed her mind when I asked her to get together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone can be avoidant, dear. But have you considered the common denominator here?

Yes, I have considered the common denominator here. I think I am probably more attracted to avoidant women, unfortunately. I tend not to get as excited about non-avoidant women. The strange thing is that I sometimes haven't actually noticed the women's avoidant tendencies until I've known them for a while. How quickly can you tell a woman is avoidant? By the way, I don't think these have been the ordinary kind of "she's not that into you" situations. The "she's not that into you" situations don't usually involve the kind of chemistry I'm talking about.

I'm hoping some avoidant women will respond here.

I used to have the problem of chasing unavailable men. I did therapy. It helped. You need to do therapy to figure out why you're so attracted to women who are unavailable.

[Anonymous]

What makes you say they are avoidant as opposed to they are deciding they don't want to pursue the relationship? Genuine question.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Good news. I'm now in an exclusive relationship with the most recent woman I described earlier. She has said she's both thrilled and scared and has also said she sometimes doesn't feel comfortable with how often she thinks about me, which is a lot.

Why do I say these women are avoidant? Because they all communicate that they have trouble getting comfortable. Most of them say they tend to argue with their BFs frequently. They all say things like "I'm warning you, I'm difficult" or "it takes me a really really long time to trust a man" or "my sex drive is as high as ever but I haven't been in a relationship for years" or "I'm not sure I'm ready for a real relationship" or "I'm not in a good place right now." Some of them have told me they have had sex with a lot of men in the last few years and some have had sex with very few, but I sense some common qualities.

I'm going to try to keep the one I'm with comfortable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Good news. I'm now in an exclusive relationship with the most recent woman I described earlier. She has said she's both thrilled and scared and has also said she sometimes doesn't feel comfortable with how often she thinks about me, which is a lot.

Why do I say these women are avoidant? Because they all communicate that they have trouble getting comfortable. Most of them say they tend to argue with their BFs frequently. They all say things like "I'm warning you, I'm difficult" or "it takes me a really really long time to trust a man" or "my sex drive is as high as ever but I haven't been in a relationship for years" or "I'm not sure I'm ready for a real relationship" or "I'm not in a good place right now." Some of them have told me they have had sex with a lot of men in the last few years and some have had sex with very few, but I sense some common qualities.

I'm going to try to keep the one I'm with comfortable.

She sounds nuts but is obviously hot enough to keep you chasing after her. You are choosing this for yourself. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

From what you are describing, it sounds like you are somehow drawn to women who have mental health issues.

[Anonymous]

Are you a troll?
A “relationship” after 7 days? 🤨

[Anonymous]

This whole post sounds very trolly, but as a man who dates probably in your age range I have not encountered avoidant woman whatsoever. But your posts and how much you harp on how good you are in bed and and how often the woman thinks about you reeks of severe insecurity and narcissism. Something feels very off about you and I would try to get honest with yourself and figure out what that is.

[Anonymous]

Just the way that you write about women creeps me out