Guys, let's be clear: JD Vance didn't have sex with his couch!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the record, I'm Gen X and I approve.

That he didn't write in his book that he had sex with a couch, or that he might have had sex with a couch and didn't write about it?

It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

Good lord, are we really being lectured by conservatives about civility?

I, for one, would be VERY happy to talk about this disgusting idea and will gladly put it behind me once Vance denies it.

[Anonymous]

Thank you Gen Z/Alpha for making this Gen Xer laugh out loud. Man, I love my kids’ generation. Want to take the piss out of some of the most hateful scary people who take themselves very seriously but care a LOT more about optics than truth? Tell the world they f***ed a couch and write about it in a book none of us read. Chef’s kiss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thank you Gen Z/Alpha for making this Gen Xer laugh out loud. Man, I love my kids’ generation. Want to take the piss out of some of the most hateful scary people who take themselves very seriously but care a LOT more about optics than truth? Tell the world they f***ed a couch and write about it in a book none of us read. Chef’s kiss.

It works because he absolutely looks like a guy who would do things like that and write about it.

It's also particularly dangerous for him because Trump is FASCINATED with weird sex stuff—fascinated but also holds it against people. It's why Vance even became a senator—Trump endorsed him after deciding that Mandel was a sex freak. If he bailed on Mandel, he could bail on Vance over this. Doesn't matter if it's true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look, I've been posting threads clearly up mistruths that MAGA freaks are spreading about Harris and Vance and I think it's important that we be fair... it's NOT true that JD Vance wrote in his book that he had sex with couch cushions. It just REALLY seems like it could be true.

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/jd-vance-couch-cushions/

I feel like Snopes is playing along more than a little with the many, many examples of memes and tweets they included.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look, I've been posting threads clearly up mistruths that MAGA freaks are spreading about Harris and Vance and I think it's important that we be fair... it's NOT true that JD Vance wrote in his book that he had sex with couch cushions. It just REALLY seems like it could be true.

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/jd-vance-couch-cushions/

I feel like Snopes is playing along more than a little with the many, many examples of memes and tweets they included.

I think it's just an acknowledgement of how far the allegations spread.

[Anonymous]

It could be worse. In the UK, former Prime Minister David Cameron was rumored to have had a tryst with a dearly departed pig as a part of some kind of initiation ritual.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It could be worse. In the UK, former Prime Minister David Cameron was rumored to have had a tryst with a dearly departed pig as a part of some kind of initiation ritual.

I think that's better. He did that as part of a super-bro ultra-wealthy powerful elite thing. Gross, but it was a display of machismo.

Quietly effing your couch and then writing about it as if it was a brag is just pathetic—even if it's something that never actually was in the book. People heard the cameron stuff and they thought "That rich perverted jerk—that's exactly the kind of thing the elite think they can get away with!" and when people here the JD Vance thing they think "God what a pathetic dork"... I don't think Cameron MINDED people thinking he did things like that, the problem with Vance is that he desperately wants people to know it's not true (and it is not true that he wrote about it in the book) but everyone looks at him and goes, yup, I can see that guy effing a couch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are Vance fans getting so upset at someone DEBUNKING the rumor?

The fact that this thread was even started and is still here shows the low level of discourse encouraged on this site. We are mocking your immaturity.

The report is that it was an INSIDE-OUT plastic glove INSERTED in the cushions. I'm perplexed that that level of detail doesn't give you pause for thought or a glimmer of concern relative to the possible future President of the United States.
I don't want my children's president to be fornicating with furniture.

The denial must address the full accusation. We can't have him denying the couch because there was a glove. Or weaselly about the glove because of the inside out technicality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are Vance fans getting so upset at someone DEBUNKING the rumor?

The fact that this thread was even started and is still here shows the low level of discourse encouraged on this site. We are mocking your immaturity.

The report is that it was an INSIDE-OUT plastic glove INSERTED in the cushions. I'm perplexed that that level of detail doesn't give you pause for thought or a glimmer of concern relative to the possible future President of the United States.
I don't want my children's president to be fornicating with furniture.

The denial must address the full accusation. We can't have him denying the couch because there was a glove. Or weaselly about the glove because of the inside out technicality.

Yup, and I think we need some answers about whether the Trump campaign knew that this was going to come up when they picked him... what on earth were they thinking if any of this stuff—true or not—was floating around about him?

[Anonymous]

Lol,.you clearly have never been a teenaged boy.

Humping couch cushions and the floor is so common.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look, I've been posting threads clearly up mistruths that MAGA freaks are spreading about Harris and Vance and I think it's important that we be fair... it's NOT true that JD Vance wrote in his book that he had sex with couch cushions. It just REALLY seems like it could be true.

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/jd-vance-couch-cushions/

The only way you would know this is if you were the couch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol,.you clearly have never been a teenaged boy.

Humping couch cushions and the floor is so common.

A) the accusation is not that as a teenager he mildly humped a couch, it's that as a full-grown man he acquired a plastic glove, filled it with lube, stuck it between cushions and then effed the couch like it was a woman. And then wrote about it proudly in his book where he tried to tell other people THEY were living THEIR lives wrong. That's not something full grown men, and if they do, they don't tell everyone about it proudly.

B) the problem isn't really whether Vance treats furniture that way—and we may never know if he keeps refusing to talk about it. The problem is that people are extremely willing to believe he would treat furniture that way.

C) it may not be true that he wrote about effing couches in his book, but Trump hoovers up any lurid rumor he hears and then holds it against people. With this story continuing to dominate the news cycle and Trump's donors revolting over Vance, the guy is in serious trouble.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look, I've been posting threads clearly up mistruths that MAGA freaks are spreading about Harris and Vance and I think it's important that we be fair... it's NOT true that JD Vance wrote in his book that he had sex with couch cushions. It just REALLY seems like it could be true.

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/jd-vance-couch-cushions/

The only way you would know this is if you were the couch.

Right, no one except JD Vance and the couch knows if he did this, and whether it was consensual.

But, it is not true that he proudly described doing it in his book that nobody but Snopes' fact-checker bothered to read.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are we sure he's heterosectional?

This needs to get more attention.

[Anonymous]

“Many people are saying! I've seen this news all over the place, and at least one stained couch on craigslist being up-priced because it belonged to the famous J.D.! I have no idea if it's true or not, but I can't believe so many people would say it without some evidence. J.D. should clear this up before he loses support.”

I think his stained couch is all the evidence we need.