Does Gen Z really want children or not?
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Anonymous
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My 23-year-old DD does. My 25-year-old DS, I think, also does, but I am not sure; he doesn't volunteer that information, and I don't ask.
DD expresses her desire to have kids often. |
Anonymous
Some will, some won't. I just worry about today |
Anonymous
Your son only wants four kids because he is going to get pregnant nor give birth. All the fun and none of the drawbacks. |
Anonymous
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I just want my kid to have a relationship— not looking ahead to kids.
I would say a majority of the women 40 and younger in my office are childless by choice. |
Anonymous
| I don’t think this generation wants children any more or less than previous generations. I just think they’re more comfortable with that decision and don’t feel pressured to reproduce when they don’t want to. |
Anonymous
Which is a good thing. I also think one of the key things impacting the birthrate is that we no longer pressure (and in fact discourage) very young people to follow through on accidental pregnancies outside a marriage. First fty years ago if an 18 year old got pregnant there would be intense social pressure to have the baby as well as to marry the father. Except among conservative Christians, that does not exist anymore. I grew up as part of a devout catholic community and when we were young we knew our families would have that expectation. Now none of us have it for our kids. Even those against abortion teach their kids about and encourage safe sex to prevent it bring an issue. And of course peers from non-catholic backgrounds are even less interested in their kids becoming parents at a young age due to accident. When you basically eliminate the entire category of people who become parents really young by accident, you are left with people who make conscious choices to have kids (which still sometimes includes very young people but they aren't forced). Turns out this is fewer people! |
Anonymous
Yes and yes. And I'll add he knows how much money is involved. And he knows he needs to find a wife who wants the same. Clearly, those women exist because large families happen. |
Anonymous
No, he wants four kids because he wants a large family. His uncle is currently a stay-at-home dad to three, and a great parent. I'm happy he's got that role model. |
Anonymous
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Our boys all say they want large families. They're probably the exception within their peer group.
It's interesting. In my peer group, three of us have as many kids as the next dozen. But who knows what they'll do. They're young enough to change their mind several times. |
Anonymous
| My 18 year old son and 21 yr old daughter both see themselves having kids. |
Anonymous
What a weird thing to say...their are ways around this. |
Anonymous
+1. I’m Gen X (DOB 1974) My parents had a great standard of living with my dad working FT and my mom teaching 10-15 hours a week at a community college— all in, 1-2 classes, not 10-15 contact hours, plus office hours, grading, planning etc. and really, that was more 3 hours a day, 3 days a week she was away doing something else to keep herself active outside the home, not an economic necessity and some evening grading and planning. DH and I worked as a Fed lawyer and software engineer to give our kids the same standard of living I was raised with and pay for college. I couldn’t make private practice and kids work. I ended up feeling like a failure at both. So I went Fed. DH really did 1/2 the childcare and housework and it was expensive and hard. Worth it. But hard. It shouldn’t be so expensive and so hard and I absolutely vote for policies that would give my kids an easier path, more in line with most of Europe on work flexibility, parental leave, work-life balance, good, subsidized childcare, universal pre-K, etc. It’s not my demo blocking this. Most of us are still raising kids at home and trying to pay for college. We know it’s not sustainable. And that our kids will have it worse than we did. And we want better for them. My mother, OTOH, is a Boomer and does not see the problem. My DD wants no part in having kids. But also wants a career that would be a lot of overseas travel and wouldn’t be a great fit with kids anyway. My DS is gay and does want marriage and kids- but says he doubts he will have them, because he doesn’t want to bring skids into a world where his family and kids would be under constant attack. Both have lived with Trump since they were tweens. All they have seen of politics and the US is ugliness and threats and nastiness and calls for civil war and attacks on women and LGBTQ. Add climate change and the possibility of a pregnancy going badly and being in the wrong place and not being treated, which freaks my DD out (and me out for her)? Either things really change in this country or it’s hard to see either of my kids having kids. I’d love grandkids. But, I completely get where they are coming from. |
Anonymous
Abortion is illegal in 18 states and you literally have to drive for more than a day to get to a state where you can get one from parts of the South. We now functionally require young people and poor people and people with fewer resources to carry unwanted pregnancies in many states. |
Anonymous
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Give Gen Z some credit; they are far more aware of true extent of the climate crisis their parents and grandparents created.
They see just how horrible it will soon be. Why bring children into the coming disaster? |
Anonymous
| Didn’t we have this “biological clock” ticking inside of us? Is that not a thing anymore? |