Am I wrong to be upset with DH?

[Anonymous]

East Asian here. I’d choose the playoffs hand down over the celebratory dinner. Sorry there is a conflict- that really stinks- but hey- you have two wonderful events happening in your family!

[Anonymous]

How come OP never came back?

[Anonymous]

This post is giving me step-mom vibes.

[Anonymous]

Yes, OP, you are being unreasonable and a little childish, frankly. The team he coaches is in the playoffs. Of course he needs to be there for the team. You're a grown up. Stop pouting.

[Anonymous]

As another European, I would absolutely be fine planning dinner for another time. OPs thing is celebrating her accomplishment. DHs and her kids is the actual accomplishment of their hard work.

[Anonymous]

Forget about your husband! Your kid has a big event he's probably excited about and proud of and you want to have both his parents miss it so you can celebrate yourself. How selfish

[Anonymous]

Seems like you orchestrated this so he would fail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get over it. Think of this hocky season as the conclusion of his own big project. He's the head coach of a team that made the playoffs. Seriously, it's not just about the kids, but about his own feeling of accomplishment and success. He needs to be there and it would be great if you could support him. Remake the reservations for a later date, even if it's a month out.

I am sorry but a child's hockey game and extracurricular coaching is not the same as a major work project.

Right. It's actually more important. Work is just work. It's not like it's important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seems like you orchestrated this so he would fail.

huh?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH coaches (with two other people, but he's the head coach) ice hockey. Kids made a playoff tournament. Game was just scheduled for Friday night.

This night has been on our calendar for a year: It's the date I conclude a massive project at work, a milestone that will have really big repercussions for my career. We had a special congratulatory dinner planned at a hard-to-get-into restaurant that requires reservations a month out.

I asked my DH if he could leave it to the two other coaches. He said no and was shocked that I wouldn't want to be at the playoff game because our kids come first.

Maybe I'm tired from working so hard, but I'm upset. This date has been set for months. He said we should cancel our plans and maybe we could "go on a weeknight next week."

Do I need to just get over it?

Yes - he’s the head coach and the team made the playoffs. You can reschedule.

+1 sports is like this. It’s like Phil Jackson not showing up to playoffs because of his wife wanted to go out to dinner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How come OP never came back?

I think she was deliberately vague and ambiguous with the talk of a work “dinner” when what she really meant was just a date night. It’s obvious to all of us that a date night can simply be rescheduled, and she doesn’t like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post is giving me step-mom vibes.

Yep.

[Anonymous]

I hate kid sports but even I am siding with DH on this one. Reschedule the dinner or take a friend instead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have a right to be disappointed, but you can reschedule a dinner. You cannot reschedule a playoff game. Being a coach is a commitment. Look at the bright side — you could go out somewhere easier to get into on Saturday AND make a reservation at the place you want to go in a month.

+1 I would be disappointed too OP! But I don't think it is unreasonable for your husband to want to attend a playoff game that can't be rescheduled when the dinner can easily be rescheduled.

[Anonymous]

This thread makes me sad. Women will always be last.

Your DH kinda sucks, not because of the game he can't control the schedule and as the head coach he has to show, but his attitude sucks.

He should have been empathetic and rescheduling the dinner.

He should not have tried to shame and guilt you for being disappointed.

You have the right to be disappointed.

You deserve to be celebrated.

You go to that dinner. Congratulations!