How do I become this woman when I’m older?

[Anonymous]

Good buttox is important

[Anonymous]

Surround yourself with people who live a healthy lifestyle. I recently purchased a condo on an island in an affluent area. Everywhere I look there are people walking, biking, playing pickleball, golfing, kayaking, etc. I enjoy all of those activities plus social/lifelong learning events.

My motto is “Move it or lose it.” Brain, body, social life. Those people I know who give up and sit in a chair all day seem sad and depressed.

You only get one life. Choose wisely how to spend your time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you're not that now, you will not magically become that person at 80.

This is true regarding some things: energy, optimism, general approach to life (do you try new things? try to figure things out instead of living in ignorance? make an effort to be social?)

But there also can be a sort of "magic" that can transform a person in the eyes of others, because of the way we view people differently at different ages.

The 80 yr old with the colorful clothes and great attitude and "zest for life" that you admire might have been someone you'd find annoying, pitiable, or out of touch in younger iterations. A 30 year old who wears colorful clothes, is very optimistic, and is always trying new things, might get criticized for being "too much," not dressing fashionably enough, or being naive instead of savvy. She might face pressure to make her appearance more conformist, instead of wearing what she likes, to talk less, to narrow down her interests and be more serious about work. A 50 year old who behaves this way might be seen as "kooky" and unsophisticated.

But after 70, our cultural attitude towards people reverts back to how we see people as children -- we tend to be more accepting of their idiosyncrasies, more enthusiastic about them having energy and large personalities. We don't measure them by the sometimes strict expectations for what an adult at mid-life is supposed to be (expectations that can be especially limiting for women).

So I actually think a person could be magically transformed into this sort of woman in her golden years, not because she's changed, but because people are more willing to embrace her large personality at that age than they might have been when she was younger. It's like the reward to holding onto your individuality, self-regard, and love of life, after decades of being told to be quiet and conform, and having your optimism challenged at ever turn by people who would prefer that you expect very little of life.

[Anonymous]

Mark Hyman MD wrote a book about this topic recently

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you cool now?

LOL. I'm not OP but I'll never be cool. I do hope I can be at least healthy, active, and somewhat vibrant.

I mean it's sort of like how Heidi Klum was talking about people saying they didn't understand how to be thin and fit post-baby and she was like "well, what were you like before?"

It sounds like this lady has been with it for a lifetime....

If Heidi Klum's not actually calling your cell to chat, drop the references to what celebs are talking about

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Exercise

and don't booze up or smoke cigarettes. Stay curious, open to change and happy.

[Anonymous]

I want to be like my mother who is 72. She looks much younger, is always on the go and just has a ton of energy. I’m sure part of it is great genes because her mother is in her 90’s, lives alone and is very sharp. I think the fact that my dad is very active too and that they have a great relationship helps as well.

[Anonymous]

All the older women I know of who are like this stayed single.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All the older women I know of who are like this stayed single.

+1 Most of the ones I know either stayed single, divorced, or married but never had kids. It's hard to find the time to stay cool and focus on all sorts of interesting past times for yourself when you're busy with work and raising kids.

[Anonymous]

What everyone else here is saying:

-keep engaged, whether working, going to school, volunteering. Leave your house regularly to do stuff with people.
-move your body every day. we need cardio and strength.

I see the same difference between my mom (the active one) and my MIL (the inactive one). The gap between them has widened a lot in the past few years.