DH was a huge jerk to me today and I don't know what to do next
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Anonymous
+100 very typical behavior. Looking back- I can see the time he was in it was when this out of character—walking on eggshells for me—behavior started. It only makes sense looking in the rear view mirror… |
Anonymous
And then they’re extra nice and you relax and make up…and then it happens again. And again. Then you just start not engaging. |
Anonymous
When he moved the furniture, she went and moved his stuff that she knew he didn’t want moved as a punishment to him. That’s throwing a tantrum. You can say that his tantrum was bigger (and I would agree) but she started it. It sounds like she didn’t even try to understand why he wanted something moved. Did he just bang his knee into it multiple times that day? And OP is saying too bad, I don’t care what you think, I like it there, when it’s presumably both of their apartment. Definitely immature. |
Anonymous
| He sound like a leetle beech. Go to hotel and call deevorce attorney. |
Anonymous
If my husband were tossing my shampoo all over the house I would not experience that as “success.” OP, I would ask for him to see a doctor. That is some crazy sh!t. |
Anonymous
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You’re both stressed out. You both blame eachother for lack of support even though the stresses are from the outside. You had a kind of funny fight (I could totally see Paul Rudd and Kristin wiig re-enacting this: “well then I’m re-organizing your DESK…oh YEAH well then I’m reorganizing your shampoo to the couch!”)
Try to laugh about it. Remember that line: it will still be two days till we say we’re sorry” ? Don’t just pout till you get an apology. Just coexist for a bit and give eachother some grace. You |
Anonymous
| Affair or brain tumor |
Anonymous
| My ex acted like this when having an affair. Something to keep in mind. I never would have thought it possible. |
Anonymous
This is also where my head went. If it’s completely out of character, and he’s treating you like this, a lot of times it’s infidelity. It’s like they have to psych, themselves up to hate you to justify they’re cheating. Not saying that’s what’s definitely happening here OP, but keep your eyes open. |
Anonymous
Same. It wasn’t even a consideration when he was acting like that since we still were having sex and he’d be incredibly nice and doting …then a f@@@@hg pr@ck completely uncalled for out of the blue. As the spouse you literally start thinking you are crazy. Gaslighting. Being critical of the spouse let’s them square it in their mind. |
Anonymous
| I had the same experience as these other posters. Dh started treating me markedly differently and it was because he was in love with someone else and laying the groundwork to rewrite history and say our marriage sucked. Like the others, I never saw it coming and wouldn’t have believed anyone who had suggested it at that point. For my ex, the trigger was a midlife crisis. OP, your dh wouldn’t happen to be roughly 43 years old, would he? |
Anonymous
| I also thought affair, or possibly other serious problems that are stressing him out and he’s acting out. Layoffs or setting the grounds for performance based termination at work, substance abuse, legal troubles. I’m sorry, I hope you get to the bottom of this. |
Anonymous
| ^ Yeah, I had the same concern when OP referred to her DH’s behavior as “WILDLY” out of character. Just keep an eye out, OP. |
Anonymous
| Own your part in this, OP. You both behaved childishly. And sounds like he feels you're not listening to or respecting his needs and desires. It's a two-way street. |
Anonymous
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Can anyone read???
On page 3, OP posted that they had a long talk and were going out for dinner. And people are here on this page posting about brain tumors? Damn. Get a life. |