I don’t want a baby shower

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Hosting it is not your responsibility. How many kids do you both have from other people??

I’m not sure why this matters but we both have 1 child each. We’re in our late 30’s and excited to add another baby to our blended family.

Showers Are only for FIRST child delivered by you not first child of subsequent marriages.

+1

There is nothing tackier than judging a joyful, second-time bride for wearing white or--more on point for this thread--judging the existence of a party meant welcome new life into the world.

Anyone who looks down on happiness in the name of etiquette has their own problems.

If anyone was looking down on happiness, you might have a point. But in this case people are ignoring etiquette to make the “guest of honor” miserable. In this case observing etiquette preserves the honorees happiness. If everyone else feels they want a party to be happy, they are free to leave OP happily out of it and throw whatever shindig they want.

Sure...but you didn't agree with a take specific to OP's situation, you agreed with--and put in bold--a broad take about when a shower is appropriate.

I think you’re confusing me with another poster. My only post on this thread was 08/28/2023 16:20.

If defying etiquette would make somebody happy it would make sense. If following etiquette caused unhapppiness, it would make less sense, but be understandable. MY point (I can’t speak for PP) is that when following etiquette preserves happiness, defying it to cause unhappiness seems completely unjustifiable.

You're right that I assumed you were one of the posters that I had quoted and was replying to...which I think is a fair assumption.

Did you read the posts I quoted? I was replying to those general statements, not any post made that asserted a specific view about OP. You said in your post that, "[i]f anyone was looking down on happiness, you might have a point." The posters I was replying to were, in fact, sitting in judgment of any and all showers other than one for a woman's first baby.