The line between helicoptering and dropping the rope

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the difference is teaching kids at age-appropriate times in their lives and then letting them take the lead. So maybe you pack for them when they're young, then explain it to them how you decide how many outfits to pack in elementary school, then have them lay out what they want to take in mid-late elementary and by 7th or 8th grade, they know how to pack for themselves.

This. I'd always packed my kids, but this summer I realized they were old enough to help a lot more with this process. They are 6 and 9. The 9 year old packed herself for the beach (admittedly, this is easy, mostly bathing suits and pajamas) and followed a list I gave her. 6 year old did it with me telling him what to grab, but him making all the choices.

For a European trip I might be more hands on because it's different than going to the beach in the car. You want to pack for the weather and activities. But beyond some general advice (bring a warm layer, some pants, comfortable walking shoes), I would not be double checking a teenagers bag. I would tell them if they are allowed to check a bag or not.

What is the minimum age for a tween? I feel like a big part of the reason the advice on this thread is so terrible is because it's parents of younger kids who have no experience dealing with teens when they are a responsible adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the difference is teaching kids at age-appropriate times in their lives and then letting them take the lead. So maybe you pack for them when they're young, then explain it to them how you decide how many outfits to pack in elementary school, then have them lay out what they want to take in mid-late elementary and by 7th or 8th grade, they know how to pack for themselves.

This. I'd always packed my kids, but this summer I realized they were old enough to help a lot more with this process. They are 6 and 9. The 9 year old packed herself for the beach (admittedly, this is easy, mostly bathing suits and pajamas) and followed a list I gave her. 6 year old did it with me telling him what to grab, but him making all the choices.

For a European trip I might be more hands on because it's different than going to the beach in the car. You want to pack for the weather and activities. But beyond some general advice (bring a warm layer, some pants, comfortable walking shoes), I would not be double checking a teenagers bag. I would tell them if they are allowed to check a bag or not.

What is the minimum age for a tween? I feel like a big part of the reason the advice on this thread is so terrible is because it's parents of younger kids who have no experience dealing with teens when they are a responsible adult.

And by thread - I meant this "Tweens and Teens" part of DCUM.

[Anonymous]

It was gradual and by about 6th grade they were packing on their own. Now they are in high school and the only thing I tell them is where we are going, how long, and if there is anything specific like you need one fancy outfit for X. If they forget something they have to go without or we buy it if we have to because everyone forgets something once in awhile.

[Anonymous]

If their lack of prep affects me, I hover. If it doesn't, they can learn from their mistakes.