Things you wish you could say to your boss, but never would

[Anonymous]

We are hoping you take a very long maternity leave.

[Anonymous]

I know you know my name, so why is it so hard to use it? When you write emails, use our names!!! It’s Sam. Write “Dear Sam,” not “Hi.” I don’t think you’ve ever addressed me by name when we spoke. And I’ve worked for you for ten years. Others feel the same way. It’s so weird!

[Anonymous]

A lot of us lower paid people are really smart and good at what we do. Just because you are in a better compensated position does not make you a smarter/better person. We would love for input on how to implement changes rather than you just unilaterally deciding to change workflow for something you really don't understand the details, and ends up actually making things worse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think you were ever given the opportunity to learn how to manage effectively. So a lot of this isn’t your fault.

1. It’s ok to say “thank you” and “good job” to your team. You don’t even need to do anything else to start; just “good job” and “thanks”.

2. Yelling at employees is inappropriate, and it would be more effective to have a 1:1 conversation with the person who isn’t performing than to call a staff meeting to yell at the whole team, or send an angry all-staff email with the exclamation point.

2B. The exclamation point feature should be used extremely sparingly. Like maybe once a quarter at most.

3. Normally I roll my eyes at team building, but I have never experienced such a low-energy, non-cohesive group of people until I started here. Everyone seems miserable, and scared, and while not unfriendly, no one is working towards a common goal because I don’t think there is a common goal.

+1

I think we work at the same place.

Not to mention, there are too many people "managing" people - who don't know the first thing about managing anything, at all. Why are you getting paid to manage when you don't manage??

So many people conveniently checked out and not doing their job, while other schmucks are made to do things they were not hired for (and definitely not told they were hired for) - and most of you pretend to be blissfully unaware, because it suits YOU. Most of those who WFH are laughable, while you use the ones who come into the office as mules. So many people in positions that they have no business being in (hence the pretend to be blissfully unaware).

So gross.

Wow that last paragraph describes my office almost exactly. Certain people end up as favorites and get special projects (common theme is brown-nosing the manager, not based on seniority by any means). When said project is over, they get all the recognition and awards. The rest of us who are not a favorite in the meantime have to absorb that person's regular workload, and of course no recognition. Makes for quite a toxic, dysfunctional environment with a lot of resentful people!

[Anonymous]

People have lives outside of work, even if you don’t. A little compassion goes a long way. There are ways to do things differently than you would that are still successful.

[Anonymous]

You were hired after me as my coworker. I onboarded you, taught you when I knew, and then you were promoted to be my boss.

And you are an awesome boss, who is far better at the job than I ever would be. Thanks for being so smart, kind, and graceful when dealing with people who I personally would probably strangle. I am far from perfect, but you see the best in me, which makes me want to be better.

Someday you will undoubtedly get promoted again, but I selfishly hope that it’s not for a while!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You were hired after me as my coworker. I onboarded you, taught you when I knew, and then you were promoted to be my boss.

And you are an awesome boss, who is far better at the job than I ever would be. Thanks for being so smart, kind, and graceful when dealing with people who I personally would probably strangle. I am far from perfect, but you see the best in me, which makes me want to be better.

Someday you will undoubtedly get promoted again, but I selfishly hope that it’s not for a while!

Aw - love this.
Am op and btw fwiw I have had people I manage say things like this to me and I keep them all - and I read them or think about them - and they are my favorite things about work that keep me going when everything else is horrible.
So if you have a boss who does anything good - if you can find a way to tell them irl - do it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think you were ever given the opportunity to learn how to manage effectively. So a lot of this isn’t your fault.

1. It’s ok to say “thank you” and “good job” to your team. You don’t even need to do anything else to start; just “good job” and “thanks”.

2. Yelling at employees is inappropriate, and it would be more effective to have a 1:1 conversation with the person who isn’t performing than to call a staff meeting to yell at the whole team, or send an angry all-staff email with the exclamation point.

2B. The exclamation point feature should be used extremely sparingly. Like maybe once a quarter at most.

3. Normally I roll my eyes at team building, but I have never experienced such a low-energy, non-cohesive group of people until I started here. Everyone seems miserable, and scared, and while not unfriendly, no one is working towards a common goal because I don’t think there is a common goal.

I am sorry. It's so hard to work in an environment in which people are just mean and confused. I can identify with some of these things, but my boss is really nice -- she is just a terrible manager.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seth: you are in danger of getting fired because you don't work well with others. I know and appreciate that you like me, but you need to share work with others. Also, putting in 2-3 hours a day isn't enough. Yes, everyone else is talking about work being slow, but they're still billing 6-8 hours instead of the old 8-12 hours they used to. You're way behind.

Brian: please give me more work. I think what you do is really interesting and I'd like to be more involved. But not too much, because lazy. But some, because bored.

Are you a lawyer? Would focus on trying to originate your own work so you don't need Seth or Brian.

[Anonymous]

I know that you have a side gig as a real estate agent
We know you spend your days browsing for properties and talking on the phone with buyers, sellers
You don’t know what I am working on because you do so little work

[Anonymous]

You are my favorite boss ever in my career here. I like that you are open to new ways of doing things. I appreciate your ability to handle difficult leaders. I have learned so much from you.

P.S. You don't need to share every detail about your personal life. The people in our office are a little snooty and don't appreciate inappropriate details! Let's keep working together!

[Anonymous]

Stop saying "we" when you mean me or another specific person and no group is present. It's condescending.

"We need to make sure the 3pm deadline is made."

"Have we revised the proposal for Client?"

"We're going to get all aspects of the CO trip canceled today, right?"

"Client said he emailed yesterday and has received no response. Why haven't we answered?"

Also, blue eyeliner looks good on NO ONE, so stop it. It's not quirky or edgy - especially not at almost 40. It's ok to leave your punk days behind and adapt a new identity as you age.

[Anonymous]

It's alarming how you intentionally sabotage your employee's growth and development to prevent them from moving on. You and I both know if they move on, you will be exposed for the incompetent dolt that you are.

[Anonymous]

We all joke about putting catnip in your pockets when you go on your African safari. Yes, even that guy who you think is your friend.

[Anonymous]

We know you are well intentioned and generally a good person.

Or at least we all thought that was true.

Lately, your decisions and treatment of your team are so terrible that we can’t figure out if we were wrong all along or if you might have early onset dementia. Or are you having a psychotic break? Are you on drugs? We genuinely have these conversations on our team. No one can figure out what’s happened to you.

We also notice you can’t travel without your spouse and that you don’t drive.