WFH and taking advantage? (Children)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The “take advantage” myth again?

Look, remote work is here permanently. It’s not changing. Deal with it. The way we work has shifted for good.

No one said remote work isn’t here to stay. No one is protesting that. But to work remotely, you must have child care. Obviously. It’s in every remote work contract I’ve ever seen, with the exception of during the height of the pandemic.

[Anonymous]

I guess you would all rather have women leave the workforce rather than have occasional days when they have to have the kids at home.
I would never want to work at home with a toddler or preschooler there, but you need to understand that daycare is not the same as it used to be. Not everyone makes mid-6 figures and has a nanny.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a college age kid and wish someone would acknowledge how much money working parents spent on child care when it was completely taboo to hear a peep from a kid on a conference call. Now you see every taffy and squirming toddler and no one thinks a thing of it[/quote]

We are still spending money on child care!!! But I had to keep my toddler home for literal weeks last year due to covid quarantines, closures, and actual covid. SEVERAL WEEKS. I was *still paying.* Thank goodness it's getting better now, but I hope we can find some kind of happy medium in work culture between "pay for childcare in THIS economy?!" and "any sign of your children's existence will hurt your career." [/quote]

+1. Even if you are paying for full-time time child care, there can still be many days where you're expected to work and your kids are home. My kids were toddlers pre-covid, we barely held it together, and I'm glad that some working parents are getting a slightly better deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I WFH sometimes and believe me, I never WANT my toddler to be home from daycare.

Agree the norm should be to have childcare coverage during working hours.

When there are multiple young children in daycare just please be aware that sick days are frequent, especially if one kid is an infant getting illnesses for the first time. So the employee in question may not have much choice, and you may actually be getting more work out of them if the choice is WFH day vs. sick day with no work.

Yea but before covid and the advent of WFH these days were far fewer. Clearly lots of mothers are taking advantage.

Are fathers taking advantage?

Seriously.

Also, the fathers who aren’t “taking advantage” of WFH flexibility are taking advantage of the mothers who are.

Same with the parental leave issue. So much of the American workforce relies on mothers doing two or three things at once because of the minimal express support parents of kids under ten or so are given. (yes, not all mothers/fathers/kids/employers- I for one had an employer that paid me enough to have reliable childcare, mostly pre-COVID, but even some care during).


Also, let’s be real - most jobs that involve several meetings with multiple throughout the day don’t actually need 40 hours a week of sustained, focused work. Most of it can be done in a LOT less time, in bursts scattered throughout the work week for various reasons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I WFH sometimes and believe me, I never WANT my toddler to be home from daycare.

Agree the norm should be to have childcare coverage during working hours.

When there are multiple young children in daycare just please be aware that sick days are frequent, especially if one kid is an infant getting illnesses for the first time. So the employee in question may not have much choice, and you may actually be getting more work out of them if the choice is WFH day vs. sick day with no work.

Yea but before covid and the advent of WFH these days were far fewer. Clearly lots of mothers are taking advantage.

Are fathers taking advantage?

Only of their wives

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a college age kid and wish someone would acknowledge how much money working parents spent on child care when it was completely taboo to hear a peep from a kid on a conference call. Now you see every taffy and squirming toddler and no one thinks a thing of it

I mean, clearly some people think a thing if it or this thread would not exist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:During and immediately after the pandemic, I was fine with whatever people needed to do to get by. But as someone who pays a ton for good child care, yes, I am beyond annoyed to see someone’s kid in a meeting. It’s not 2020 or 2021. There is no excuse.

HFM went around my daycare a few weeks back, my daughter was out of daycare for a week. Would you rather I call out unexpectedly for the week or have my toddler occasionally making a peep during our call?

[Anonymous]

I work from home and haven’t seen this since way back at the start of covid. I have 3 small children and, though I would love to save money on childcare, there is no way I could work and also watch them.

My husband is the go to parent if kid or kids are sick and he will wfh watching them on these days but never puts them on camera if he has to go into a virtual meeting

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:During and immediately after the pandemic, I was fine with whatever people needed to do to get by. But as someone who pays a ton for good child care, yes, I am beyond annoyed to see someone’s kid in a meeting. It’s not 2020 or 2021. There is no excuse.

HFM went around my daycare a few weeks back, my daughter was out of daycare for a week. Would you rather I call out unexpectedly for the week or have my toddler occasionally making a peep during our call?

+1, this was the point I made earlier. I actually think employers have the advantage in these scenarios because what used to be a paid sick day is now expected to be a WFH day unless you're severely ill. I have taken maybe 2 actual sick days this year and I am mildly ill constantly due to a kid in daycare.

Also some of what OP may be seeing/hearing is likely a kid who is being supervised by the spouse who is fully off work, but who is not doing a 100% job supervising.

[Anonymous]

It annoys me too, and I have three children. I understand a one-off - sick kid, school closure - but even then you need to try to get back up help or at least switch off with spouse (if both are able to work from home).

That being said, the modern workplace isn’t really designed for people with outside obligations. A 30 hour/4 day workweek with max flexibility is really what’s needed. The 40-hour workweek is arbitrary and outdated.

[Anonymous]

I know zero parents who WFH without childcare. Zero. Even parents of older kids (10+) have childcare. If one of their kids is home while they’re working, it 100% was not intentional.

Most parents of kids ages 2+ don’t want their kids home. They want socialization and enrichment. I would feel guilty as heck keeping my kids home all day so I could ignore them and sit on my computer, just to save $.

In the summers, I pay more than I earn to put my 3 kids in high quality camps. They love it and it makes me feel good knowing they’re having fun with friends and learning new things while I’m working.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It annoys me too, and I have three children. I understand a one-off - sick kid, school closure - but even then you need to try to get back up help or at least switch off with spouse (if both are able to work from home).

That being said, the modern workplace isn’t really designed for people with outside obligations. A 30 hour/4 day workweek with max flexibility is really what’s needed. The 40-hour workweek is arbitrary and outdated.

Oh, come on. you’re a parent. You know how hard it is to find back up care on very short notice. That’s a crock of crap. Not everyone has a “village” when last minute care is needed (even paid). Do you think people want to be working with their kids running around?

[Anonymous]

I’ve worked from home for 12 years now and this has never ever been an issue except for a few months of the pandemic. I don’t know anyone that does this.

When my kids (4 and 2) are sick I take a sick day and/or catch up that evening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:During and immediately after the pandemic, I was fine with whatever people needed to do to get by. But as someone who pays a ton for good child care, yes, I am beyond annoyed to see someone’s kid in a meeting. It’s not 2020 or 2021. There is no excuse.

HFM went around my daycare a few weeks back, my daughter was out of daycare for a week. Would you rather I call out unexpectedly for the week or have my toddler occasionally making a peep during our call?

Well if you have the ability to call out for a week, why wouldn’t you??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, wake up and smell the coffee. This isn’t 2020.

Right. Nowadays women can openly fleece their employers and the taxpayer.

Men don’t have children? Your misogyny is showing, in addition to your lack of intelligence.

Sadly, the burden of child rearing is on women in most countries including the US. Remember when you took maternity leave and your husband took a few weeks max? That was your own misogyny showing when you went along with that.

My husband took 4 months of paternity leave with each of our kids. Troll harder next time.