Triggers for me as a "skinny minny"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The post was from 2020, and Pink was water surfing. It popped up somewhere in my newsfeed today.

https://www.shape.com/celebrities/celebrity-photos/pink-thunder-thighs-wakesurfing

She doesn't appear to have cellulite. I'd happily rock those "thunder thighs"!

Yet a hugely successful musician feels the need to discuss and defend her thunder thighs. Surely she took time to get to a point of acceptance of her body. She's only 5'4" and weighs 160 according to her own accounts. That's an overweight BMI at 27.5.

It shouldn't be triggering to a more slender built woman.

[Anonymous]

So you are triggered? Or you aren't? Because you are skinny? Or because you aren't?

I need to leave this thread before my brain melts trying to understand what's happening

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think what triggered me, was seeing a social media post and an article about how Pink posted a picture of herself waterskiing. She called it "thunder thighs." And she wrote about how she had kids, and she was proud of the way she looked and how strong she was in her early 40s.

Well, okay. I don't think thunder thighs have ever been out of style, especially not in 2023.

Not every woman can achieve that muscular look in her thighs. It doesn't mean we're under-eating or skinny fat. I don't care how much pasta I eat and how many squats I do, I will never have thunder thighs.

OP, what is the point of your thread? You are an average-sized woman going on and on about how people think you are soooo skinny and you will never have thunder thighs. Um, good for you?

Please get your head checked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mother's wedding dress was a size 3 when she married at 19. She said the kids would tease her and call her "skinny minny." She was very petite, under 5'2". However, she wasn't flat chested. She had an hour glass figure. She used to eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

I had the same problem.

My senior year of high school, I finally passed the 99 pound weight to 110 pounds. I thought I looked really good. I am about 5'4".

Today I'm in my early 50s. I'm still 5'4". I weigh 130. I'm also a 32D bra size. I'm not really "skinny."

cool story mee-maw, tell us more about the olden days!

Huh? This woman is in her 50s, on DCUM that means she probably has a few toddlers.

[Anonymous]

What exactly triggers you about your own personal story? There is really truly nothing dramatic or interesting here.

[Anonymous]

OP, I would not notice a woman your size around this area as being either skinny or heavy... 5'4" and 130 sounds like a very normal size for this area, very much within the category of average height and weight and totally unremarkable in that sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think what triggered me, was seeing a social media post and an article about how Pink posted a picture of herself waterskiing. She called it "thunder thighs." And she wrote about how she had kids, and she was proud of the way she looked and how strong she was in her early 40s.

Well, okay. I don't think thunder thighs have ever been out of style, especially not in 2023.

Not every woman can achieve that muscular look in her thighs. It doesn't mean we're under-eating or skinny fat. I don't care how much pasta I eat and how many squats I do, I will never have thunder thighs.

Being skinny has never been out of style, not even in 2023. But here you are blathering.

While I agree with this I think, in recent years, a very specific body type of body has been touted as the “ideal”. Large butt, muscular legs, tiny waist, large perky chest. This is a look a lot of “fitness” influencers will fake with plastic surgery and/or photo editing.

We, as women, are so much better than this! We are all blessed with unique bodies and we can focus on our health and appearance without comparing ourselves to random ever changing trends. Your body doesn’t need to be “on trend”, we are all better than that. OP, rock what you’ve got and stop looking for reason to feel bad about the way you look. Your body deserves more respect than that.

This. I think disordered thinking around women's bodies is just so deeply engrained that even when we think we're breaking out of it, we get sucked back in.

It used to be that being small and weak was desirable, because it was "feminine". Even in the era of Marilyn Monroe, who was very curvy, women were supposed to look soft and feminine, which meant having a narrow waist and no visible muscles. Being physically strong as a woman was associated with being butch, pushy, unfeminine. Women were supposed to be dominated by men.

This got doubled down on during the feminism of the 70s and 80s because women were demanding equality in the workforce, embracing birth control so they could decide when and how to have kids, and demanding equality in their relationships. That recent Brooke Shield documentary talks about how the embrace of very young, waifish models and actresses was partly a response to this -- if adult women were going to demand equality, then society would set the standard for beauty and attraction at young girls, who could still be relied upon to be weak and subservient.

Thankfully we've seen a huge backlash against these attitudes in the last 20-30 years, but a lot of it has just been another form of misogyny. Stuff like "real women have curves" is obviously just another form of putting women down or trying to narrowly define what it means to be sexy (and continues to make the primary metric for evaluating women their appeal to men). A focus on fitness has led to a fixation on women being physically strong, but that too can be perverted and turned into an excuse to put down women who aren't overtly muscular or "fit" in a very narrowly defined way (that usually also emphasizes having a narrow waist and big boobs, oh by the way).

Like we've just gotten to the point where we can now criticize every single woman's body. What a win! Like how to you successfully navigate never being too fat, too skinny, too muscular, insufficiently toned, etc.? What even is the ideal we are working towards? It feels like there isn't one, and we just weaponize judgments about body types to keep women feeling like crap. We accuse larger women of overeating and being lazy, but we accuse smaller women of having eating disorders and not "lifting heavy" or whatever.

It's exhausting and it should surprise no one that it results in women feeling bad about themselves no matter what their bodies look like. As a woman, there is a 99.9% chance that your body is considered to have something "wrong" with it according to the media, the fashion industry, the fitness industry, men, or other women. And even the women who somehow manage to win this contest? Live in constant fear of aging or getting pregnant or gaining a little weight or losing a little volume or whatever, and that keeps the plastic surgeon and fitness studios and fashion and beauty industry in business.

You cannot win.

I always remember the scene in mean girls where Cady is marvelling at how the plastics can have so many ways of disliking their appearances. PP is absolutely correct that there's no woman alive who can't think of something about her appearance that someone somewhere has said something disparaging about.

OP, I can understand why you feel like everything said about your appearance is critical. But please try to consider that some of the people commenting on it are jealous of your relatively slender build since at least "skinny" doesn't come with horrible clothes and higher insurance premiums.

[Anonymous]

And?

[Anonymous]

You’d be called fat in Japan. And in the U.S. you are far from skinny, hon.

[Anonymous]

Skinny people really annoy me. Not 5'4" 130 lb, I'm talking 5'4" 85 lbs like my ex DIL. Sorry, I know it's probably just me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’d be called fat in Japan. And in the U.S. you are far from skinny, hon.

Ikr? I'm 5'7 135 and no one comments on my body. At 130, I got "you're soooo thin". Op, I think you can relax.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’d be called fat in Japan. And in the U.S. you are far from skinny, hon.

Ikr? I'm 5'7 135 and no one comments on my body. At 130, I got "you're soooo thin". Op, I think you can relax.

But you are not as short as op. Or as nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand what your trigger is. Someone commenting that you’re thin? Hearing people talk about how skinny a young girl is? The fact that you’re not the skinniest one anymore?

My mother is the same height as you and followed pretty much the same trajectory, except she was probably a bit heavier in her fifties. She’s now 81 and weighs 99-101 lbs. She eats really well, but watches her carbs due to a strong family history of diabetes. She’s super physically active for someone her age. You will probably end up being a “skinny minnie” again in your old age.

I don't want to be skinny. LoL. That's the point of my whole thread. I'm not triggered because I'm not "skinny" anymore. I weigh 130 pounds, and I'm still hearing from people that I'm too skinny. I could probably weigh 160, and I'd still have people telling me how skinny I am.

If you weren’t, you wouldn’t have started this thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think what triggered me, was seeing a social media post and an article about how Pink posted a picture of herself waterskiing. She called it "thunder thighs." And she wrote about how she had kids, and she was proud of the way she looked and how strong she was in her early 40s.

Well, okay. I don't think thunder thighs have ever been out of style, especially not in 2023.

Not every woman can achieve that muscular look in her thighs. It doesn't mean we're under-eating or skinny fat. I don't care how much pasta I eat and how many squats I do, I will never have thunder thighs.

OK, now you crossed the line into troll territory.

Get a hobby.

[Anonymous]

I am sure you will find a way to survive the pain of people telling you that you are skinny at 5 foot 4 and 130 lbs. I know it is unusual that someone has to overcome such a difficult struggle, but I am confident that you can do it.

+1. When I was 20, 5'4 and 87 pounds with an eating disorder I did one of those carnival games where some random dude had to guess my weight. He guessed 120 and THAT was a struggle. That was my starting point before my mom persuaded me that I was grotesquely large.

I'm 115 pounds at age 50, don't look skinny and don't get comments about my size from anyone. I have a pretty big frame for my height, like a mini linebacker.