If you turned down a top liberal arts school for a cheaper state school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let me say that I think UMD is a fantastic school and anyone who gets in - which is a much tougher admit than it used to be - can get a great education. And in general, smart, ambitious, determined kids can go anywhere from any school.

Still for us, my immigrant husband who won't spend a dime on anything other than education felt VERY strongly about ensuring that our kids could go to the best possible school that they could get into. His argument was that their horizons will be exponentially wider if they are at a competitive school with peers from all over the country and all over the world.

That is true in my own experience - I lucked into an Ivy back when an ordinary smart kid could do that. It exposed me to ideas and people whom I would have never met at my state flagship, even though it is/was a fine school.

At UMD you will meet "peers from all over the country and all over the world". There is a large cohort of kids at UMD (or any big flagship) who had the intelligence and academic chops to succeed at a T20 school but didn't get in or didn't go for a variety of reasons - including money - but the simple fact is that every elite school rejects a dozen or more qualified kids for every kid they accept. They have to, they don't have room for all the qualified kids. And those qualified kids go somewhere... like UMD.

[Anonymous]

OP, I don't get a sense that your DD wants to go to Emory for any other reason than "the name" - you haven't mentioned if there's a particular program at Emory that she wants to do that is way better than at UMD. If that is so, then UMD is an excellent choice and you shouldn't be sad if she does that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was in this position when I was your DD's age. I wound up going to the state school and have mixed feelings about it. My parents did not have as much money saved as you do, but we did not qualify for financial aid. So attending the SLAC would have required loans and that is the primary reason I attended the state school. I am really, really glad I did not incur undergrad loans. However, I did feel overwhelmed and a bit lost at my huge state school, never really fit in with the culture, and didn't enjoy my college experience very much. Now, it's been decades and I don't often sit around thinking about how I didn't enjoy college that much -- it was a long time ago and I have a great life.

However, from a career standpoint, I do sometimes wish I had a stronger network from undergrad, or really any network from undergrad, because I can see how that is really beneficial. I also envy people with close friends from college -- I have a couple friends I've stayed in touch with but no one I'm close to because I was honestly never that close to people in college. In retrospect, I was almost certainly depressed and struggling, but I think it was hard for people to recognize that (and I wonder if the large school environment contributed to that as well).

I don't think it was the "wrong" choice to go to a state school. I did in fact wind up going to grad school (though would I have done that if I'd had a better undergrad experience and felt less adrift? hard to say). Again, no debt is huge. But you have the money to send your DD to Emory without incurring debt. There's no guarantee she'll go to grad school, and there are ways to do grad school affordably (do a fully funded program, don't do law or business school unless it's a top program and you are fully committed to working in a high-pay job until loans are paid off).

I think if I were in your position, given my own experience, I would let her decide and a major factor would be personality and whether that state flagship would be the right fit for this particular student. She's obviously worked hard in school to gain admission to a school like Emory, I think there is an argument that pushing her towards the state school to save money, especially if attending a huge school might not work for her, could be a mistake.

I think we need a new thread on students at highly selective schools who turned down full tuition scholarships at state universities. I bet there will be few takers because highly selective students/parents usually don't come to DCUM. They are probably too busy.

[Anonymous]

My BFF went to Emory. It is no better a college than UMD. The financial differential between $27k / yr and $85k/yr is huge. I think it's a no brainer and would choose UMD

[Anonymous]

If your child has plans for law school, med school or any other type of grad school that will require tuition, go to UMD and save the money for post-graduate education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My BFF went to Emory. It is no better a college than UMD. The financial differential between $27k / yr and $85k/yr is huge. I think it's a no brainer and would choose UMD

We are talking Emory here. I know it has improved but it’s not Harvard. The opportunity cost of not getting an Emory degree doesn’t seem brutally high. I too have heard of current students not liking it that much. If money is tight and UMD seems appealing to the student, seems like a pretty reasonable decision to go to UMD

[Anonymous]

This is a tricky one for me because there’s a list of schools I would pay for (because of the experience and fit as well as the name/network) but I don’t know enough about Emory to assess. It’s sort of a cipher, and not necessarily a slac. Can you be explicit about what she likes about the school? Visits? Specific fields of study or profs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MY DD has been accepted to Emory University and total costs will be close to $85,000. We received no merit. She was also accepted to UMD - College Park and we are in state.

If she goes to Emory, she will use her entire 529 College Fund leaving nothing for graduate school.

Of course, if she goes to UMD, she will have $ left.

I am rather sad for her but it doesn't seem like a wise move financially to go with Emory and we are leaning towards UMD College Park.

Anyone else in this situation? Accepted to competitive college or top 20 college and cannot justify such a high cost?

She's lucky she has these options. What are her career goals?

Don't be sad to send your kid to UMD over Emory. You know your child, if they will thrive at UMD it will be fine. If they need to leave the nest and go further to a smaller school and you can make that happen without financial hardship do that. Don't worry about the rankings and being judged.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me say that I think UMD is a fantastic school and anyone who gets in - which is a much tougher admit than it used to be - can get a great education. And in general, smart, ambitious, determined kids can go anywhere from any school.

Still for us, my immigrant husband who won't spend a dime on anything other than education felt VERY strongly about ensuring that our kids could go to the best possible school that they could get into. His argument was that their horizons will be exponentially wider if they are at a competitive school with peers from all over the country and all over the world.

That is true in my own experience - I lucked into an Ivy back when an ordinary smart kid could do that. It exposed me to ideas and people whom I would have never met at my state flagship, even though it is/was a fine school.

At UMD you will meet "peers from all over the country and all over the world". There is a large cohort of kids at UMD (or any big flagship) who had the intelligence and academic chops to succeed at a T20 school but didn't get in or didn't go for a variety of reasons - including money - but the simple fact is that every elite school rejects a dozen or more qualified kids for every kid they accept. They have to, they don't have room for all the qualified kids. And those qualified kids go somewhere... like UMD.

+1 after a certain threshold, admissions to those schools becomes like a lottery. Those who don't win the lottery end up at schools like UMD with a lot of merit aid.

Someone listed the college acceptance/attendance for Richard Montgomery IB magnet cohort for the last 3 years -- some 30% to 40% went to UMD. I know that several other magnet students from other MCPS HS end up at UMD, too. It's a very large school, and there is a cohort of very high achieving kids there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was in this position when I was your DD's age. I wound up going to the state school and have mixed feelings about it. My parents did not have as much money saved as you do, but we did not qualify for financial aid. So attending the SLAC would have required loans and that is the primary reason I attended the state school. I am really, really glad I did not incur undergrad loans. However, I did feel overwhelmed and a bit lost at my huge state school, never really fit in with the culture, and didn't enjoy my college experience very much. Now, it's been decades and I don't often sit around thinking about how I didn't enjoy college that much -- it was a long time ago and I have a great life.

However, from a career standpoint, I do sometimes wish I had a stronger network from undergrad, or really any network from undergrad, because I can see how that is really beneficial. I also envy people with close friends from college -- I have a couple friends I've stayed in touch with but no one I'm close to because I was honestly never that close to people in college. In retrospect, I was almost certainly depressed and struggling, but I think it was hard for people to recognize that (and I wonder if the large school environment contributed to that as well).

I don't think it was the "wrong" choice to go to a state school. I did in fact wind up going to grad school (though would I have done that if I'd had a better undergrad experience and felt less adrift? hard to say). Again, no debt is huge. But you have the money to send your DD to Emory without incurring debt. There's no guarantee she'll go to grad school, and there are ways to do grad school affordably (do a fully funded program, don't do law or business school unless it's a top program and you are fully committed to working in a high-pay job until loans are paid off).

I think if I were in your position, given my own experience, I would let her decide and a major factor would be personality and whether that state flagship would be the right fit for this particular student. She's obviously worked hard in school to gain admission to a school like Emory, I think there is an argument that pushing her towards the state school to save money, especially if attending a huge school might not work for her, could be a mistake.

No tight friends? No alumni network? You are blaming the large school but it’s not the school....

PP didn't blame the school, she said it wasn't a good fit for her so she was depressed and struggling and so didn't reap these benefits from the school. She wonders if her situation would be different at a smaller school which it very well could have been. I think you should never "push" a kid to an option--you lay out the financial reality and what you are able/willing to pay and let them decide. There might be more options to consider besides these two and the kid is the one who has to own and live through the decision.

My DS wound up depressed, struggling and anxious at an elite SLAC. He transferred to a big state school and did much better. Plus it was a hell of a lot cheaper for me, so that was a win-win.

SLAC can be isolating for some kids. My kid chose a state school after being in small HS. So far he likes it and has met very smart kids from all over. Among his friends who chose LAC, the kids who seem to like it the most are those who play sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My parents' philosophy was they would pay for the best college we could get into. I don't know if I share that viewpoint now that I'm a parent myself. I tend to think if your kid is a strong enough student to get into Emory then she'll do well no matter where she goes and UMD is a great school too. If she goes to UMD and excels there, she will likely have no trouble getting into a good grad school and/or starting a great career. Emory has more prestige and overall it may offer a better college experience but I think for most kids the benefits of going to Emory over UMD would be marginal. Lots of very successful and smart people go to state schools and get great educations.

My parents was--go in-state and we will pay in full and you will have zero loans (and they).

I didn't even apply out of state or private. I ended up get a stipend/tuition paid for my Master's degree by being a TA in the lab.

I saw friends saddled with student loan debt and my husband worked his butt off and made a ton of sacrifices to pay them off before we got married.

I am doing very well. 28-year career at same level as many Ivy and top private university grads. I can't see it harmed me in anyway.

[Anonymous]

Emory is a good school, but I don't think it is worth it. I'd go in-state and use that saved $ for professional degree or grad degree if needed/wanted.

If it were Harvard or Yale or MIT or Princeton, I might make a different decision, but not for Emory.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My BFF went to Emory. It is no better a college than UMD. The financial differential between $27k / yr and $85k/yr is huge. I think it's a no brainer and would choose UMD

It’s a totally different school that attracts different kinds of students. So of course it will be better or worse depending on the person. Otherwise you can argue stats and rankings, etc. and Emory will come out ahead in most cases (also shown in rankings), but it comes down to thriving in the environment. If this need is met you can get a good education at either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me say that I think UMD is a fantastic school and anyone who gets in - which is a much tougher admit than it used to be - can get a great education. And in general, smart, ambitious, determined kids can go anywhere from any school.

Still for us, my immigrant husband who won't spend a dime on anything other than education felt VERY strongly about ensuring that our kids could go to the best possible school that they could get into. His argument was that their horizons will be exponentially wider if they are at a competitive school with peers from all over the country and all over the world.

That is true in my own experience - I lucked into an Ivy back when an ordinary smart kid could do that. It exposed me to ideas and people whom I would have never met at my state flagship, even though it is/was a fine school.

At UMD you will meet "peers from all over the country and all over the world". There is a large cohort of kids at UMD (or any big flagship) who had the intelligence and academic chops to succeed at a T20 school but didn't get in or didn't go for a variety of reasons - including money - but the simple fact is that every elite school rejects a dozen or more qualified kids for every kid they accept. They have to, they don't have room for all the qualified kids. And those qualified kids go somewhere... like UMD.

Yes, as I said in my post, there are tons of smart kids at UMD and there are people from all over the country and the world as well. But attending a state flagship that draws 3/4 of its undergraduates from in-state is not an identical experience to going to a highly competitive private school like Emory. If the OP's kid is going to turn down Emory just to keep the money in the bank in case it's needed for grad school, they should know what they're missing. There's no way I would be doing what I'm doing today if I had gone to my state flagship.

[Anonymous]

Which major? I can't see any reason to choose Emory unless they have something UMD doesn't have