Screamer toddler and screens

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every time any of my kids scream they are put outside. Even the 15 month old. They sit on the porch or very safe fenced in yard. If you act like you’re playing outside, outside you go.

Rain, snow, wind. Outside. Stops the screaming.

I have no tolerance for screaming in our tiny house.

Smart

No, sounds like it’s unacceptable to have big feelings…an 18 month old has no way of using words to say what they need/what’s wrong. Sending them outside to manage anything on their own tells them YOU can’t handle it and can’t be trusted to help them sort it out.

God, you bIg fEeliNgS people are so absurd. You can have feelings. Since you are not a wordless infant, SCREAMING (not normal crying) is an unacceptable way to communicate those feelings. If you persist, your life will be made very boring until you stop.

And before you bother, yes, I have multiple kids, from a freshman in college to upper elementary. Yes, we have good relationships. Yes, they would tell you the same. Have we covered all the predictable retort bases?

Stop raising coddled children. The world doesn’t need more coddled adults.

new pp - I disagree. I hear you that some parents take "gentle" parenting to a place it is not intended (forgetting the boundaries piece), but that isn't how it should be and it isn't what people are telling the op to do. it's not coddling to not give a kid what they want when they scream but also choose not to put them outside alone. That is a huge jump to say you will raise coddled children unless you're willing to put them outside alone when they do something you don't like/want to stop - if the child isn't given what they want it's not coddling. Its a different approach to stay with the child while they are upset but it still holds the same boundary that you are holding.

Your tone is dismissive, rude, and talking to other people like they are an idiot - all things I don't want to teach my kid to do when they disagree with someone so it really is tainting the advice you are giving.

NP. I didn’t find her tone dismissive or rude (talking to other people like an idiot is covered under dismissive and rude, bless your heart). But I’m sure your kids suck based on your post and I’d rather be around hers.

You're sure my kids suck because I said I don't let them scream or give them the thing they want, but personally don't prefer to have them put outside alone as a punishment for it? I truly don't understand the vitriol for stating I disagree with the assertion your kids will be coddled unless you use the posters approach and disagree with the tone with which the poster is responding. There isn't a lot of gray area in whether a post is dismissive when it starts with "God, you bIg fEeliNgS people are so absurd."

I can acknowledge that some gentle parenting has gone way too far, as I did in my post. And I still think there is a middle ground. I also believe that ops kids are probably fine! If there were lots of other moments of connection in the day, I personally don't think that is going to ruin everything. But it's not a choice I would make and that doesn't make me a bad parent either or mean my kids are coddled, or suck. It can't feel good to spend your time leaving mean posts on dcum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every time any of my kids scream they are put outside. Even the 15 month old. They sit on the porch or very safe fenced in yard. If you act like you’re playing outside, outside you go.

Rain, snow, wind. Outside. Stops the screaming.

I have no tolerance for screaming in our tiny house.

Smart

No, sounds like it’s unacceptable to have big feelings…an 18 month old has no way of using words to say what they need/what’s wrong. Sending them outside to manage anything on their own tells them YOU can’t handle it and can’t be trusted to help them sort it out.

God, you bIg fEeliNgS people are so absurd. You can have feelings. Since you are not a wordless infant, SCREAMING (not normal crying) is an unacceptable way to communicate those feelings. If you persist, your life will be made very boring until you stop.

And before you bother, yes, I have multiple kids, from a freshman in college to upper elementary. Yes, we have good relationships. Yes, they would tell you the same. Have we covered all the predictable retort bases?

Stop raising coddled children. The world doesn’t need more coddled adults.

+1. I get really tired of that phrase on here. It's important to teach kids they can't do things like screaming when they are upset and that they need to calm down and use words to communicate.

Some of us are able to teach our kids boundaries and emotional regulation without throwing them outside like dogs. That you equate empathy with weakness says a lot about you.

Nothing wrong to give space to children to calm down. Are you stupid? They give space to kids with tantrums in daycares and centers too. No ONE can ca lm down a tantrum. Be mindful just like adults, kids will learn to calm down by themselves

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every time any of my kids scream they are put outside. Even the 15 month old. They sit on the porch or very safe fenced in yard. If you act like you’re playing outside, outside you go.

Rain, snow, wind. Outside. Stops the screaming.

I have no tolerance for screaming in our tiny house.

Smart

No, sounds like it’s unacceptable to have big feelings…an 18 month old has no way of using words to say what they need/what’s wrong. Sending them outside to manage anything on their own tells them YOU can’t handle it and can’t be trusted to help them sort it out.

God, you bIg fEeliNgS people are so absurd. You can have feelings. Since you are not a wordless infant, SCREAMING (not normal crying) is an unacceptable way to communicate those feelings. If you persist, your life will be made very boring until you stop.

And before you bother, yes, I have multiple kids, from a freshman in college to upper elementary. Yes, we have good relationships. Yes, they would tell you the same. Have we covered all the predictable retort bases?

Stop raising coddled children. The world doesn’t need more coddled adults.

new pp - I disagree. I hear you that some parents take "gentle" parenting to a place it is not intended (forgetting the boundaries piece), but that isn't how it should be and it isn't what people are telling the op to do. it's not coddling to not give a kid what they want when they scream but also choose not to put them outside alone. That is a huge jump to say you will raise coddled children unless you're willing to put them outside alone when they do something you don't like/want to stop - if the child isn't given what they want it's not coddling. Its a different approach to stay with the child while they are upset but it still holds the same boundary that you are holding.

Your tone is dismissive, rude, and talking to other people like they are an idiot - all things I don't want to teach my kid to do when they disagree with someone so it really is tainting the advice you are giving.

Thank you for your input, Tone Police. Since your name is not Jeff and you are not a moderator, I will give it all the consideration it deserves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every time any of my kids scream they are put outside. Even the 15 month old. They sit on the porch or very safe fenced in yard. If you act like you’re playing outside, outside you go.

Rain, snow, wind. Outside. Stops the screaming.

I have no tolerance for screaming in our tiny house.

Smart

No, sounds like it’s unacceptable to have big feelings…an 18 month old has no way of using words to say what they need/what’s wrong. Sending them outside to manage anything on their own tells them YOU can’t handle it and can’t be trusted to help them sort it out.

God, you bIg fEeliNgS people are so absurd. You can have feelings. Since you are not a wordless infant, SCREAMING (not normal crying) is an unacceptable way to communicate those feelings. If you persist, your life will be made very boring until you stop.

And before you bother, yes, I have multiple kids, from a freshman in college to upper elementary. Yes, we have good relationships. Yes, they would tell you the same. Have we covered all the predictable retort bases?

Stop raising coddled children. The world doesn’t need more coddled adults.

+1. I get really tired of that phrase on here. It's important to teach kids they can't do things like screaming when they are upset and that they need to calm down and use words to communicate.

Some of us are able to teach our kids boundaries and emotional regulation without throwing them outside like dogs. That you equate empathy with weakness says a lot about you.

That you pretend coddling is “empathy” says a lot about you. Guess we’re even. Shrug.