Your childhood memories of vacation, food, and going out to eat? Are you resentful?

[Anonymous]

Resentful? My parents did the best they could with the money they had. We only went out to eat for celebration events (birthdays/good grades) but my mom was an amazing cook. We typically only went on vacations that involved camping but I have some great childhood memories from that.

My kids memories are going to be totally different. Lots of travel and eating out. Sometimes I wish we were raising them in a simpler way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was growing up, we went to a restaurant on special occasions like birthdays. It was festive and good training for how to behave in that environment. My parents were invariably respectful to the staff and that taught me to be the same.

On vacation, it depended on where we were. Many trips were to visit family so of course we just ate in. The adults would go out to a restaurant one time per trip. Mainly to get away from us, I think! We would also road trip and pack breakfast food for the motel and lunches for the road. Again, once per trip, we would go to a fancy restaurant in the place we were visiting to get a better feel for the place according to my parents. We camped a good deal and learned to make dinner over a camp stove and an open fire.

No, I’m not resentful that I ate a lot of cereal in motel rooms and sandwiches in the station wagon or at a rest stop. My parents knew how to have fun without spending a lot of money. I think it’s a lost art for so many people.

We’ve don’t ever stop for fast food on road trips. I hate feeling awful while confined to a car. I always pack picnics to eat at rest stops, parks, etc. My kids are teens now and we have so many great random picnic memories.

Agreed. I would much rather be out at a park with a healthy lunch. Places are so easy to find these days with Google maps, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My aunt always felt resentful that we only went out to eat once to a nice restaurant. And maybe ordered pizza out. We cooked the rest of the time. It didn't feel like a vacation to her.

Your aunt sounds like an incredibly ungrateful brat. I hope her sense of entitlement wore off as she got older?

My aunt, my mother, and my grandmother were the ones doing all the cooking on vacation when we were kids. That was my point. I didn't feel resentment at going out to one nice restaurant a week or ordering pizza. She felt resentment having to cook during a vacation. LoL.

[Anonymous]

My parents never had much money while we were growing up but they did their best to give us nice things. We would go on vacation but skimp on restaurants. I can’t remember what we ate but I do remember where we went and what we did. Why would I resent my parents for this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My aunt always felt resentful that we only went out to eat once to a nice restaurant. And maybe ordered pizza out. We cooked the rest of the time. It didn't feel like a vacation to her.

Your aunt sounds like an incredibly ungrateful brat. I hope her sense of entitlement wore off as she got older?

My aunt, my mother, and my grandmother were the ones doing all the cooking on vacation when we were kids. That was my point. I didn't feel resentment at going out to one nice restaurant a week or ordering pizza. She felt resentment having to cook during a vacation. LoL.

If all the men are sitting around drinking beers on the deck while the women are expected to do all the cooking (happens on my ILs beach vacations) I don't blame your aunt one bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I saw something recently, an article that mentioned someone resenting that their parents never took them out and always brought food from home when they went on vacations.

I’ve been on here about 13/14 years now and see that people still do bring foods to cook while on vacations. I never traveled as a child but I’ve done this as an adult to my own children never realizing this can be a negative memory. Not for every meal but I have taken things like oatmeal, cereal for quick breakfasts in the hotel room.

I did not go out to eat often as a child either, we had little money, single mom household and I loved every second and have fond memories of those times. I could count them on one hand but they were throughly appreciated. I even remember what I ordered.

Ah, the Opression Olympics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was growing up, we went to a restaurant on special occasions like birthdays. It was festive and good training for how to behave in that environment. My parents were invariably respectful to the staff and that taught me to be the same.

On vacation, it depended on where we were. Many trips were to visit family so of course we just ate in. The adults would go out to a restaurant one time per trip. Mainly to get away from us, I think! We would also road trip and pack breakfast food for the motel and lunches for the road. Again, once per trip, we would go to a fancy restaurant in the place we were visiting to get a better feel for the place according to my parents. We camped a good deal and learned to make dinner over a camp stove and an open fire.

No, I’m not resentful that I ate a lot of cereal in motel rooms and sandwiches in the station wagon or at a rest stop. My parents knew how to have fun without spending a lot of money. I think it’s a lost art for so many people.

We’ve don’t ever stop for fast food on road trips. I hate feeling awful while confined to a car. I always pack picnics to eat at rest stops, parks, etc. My kids are teens now and we have so many great random picnic memories.

Picnics? Eff that. I'm not packing some basket, finding a rest stop and setting up a buffet. I'll take my family to McDonalds for $20 and save two hours of drive time.

To each his own. McDonald's is gross. Much rather enjoy fresh air and healthy food than eat crap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My aunt always felt resentful that we only went out to eat once to a nice restaurant. And maybe ordered pizza out. We cooked the rest of the time. It didn't feel like a vacation to her.

Your aunt sounds like an incredibly ungrateful brat. I hope her sense of entitlement wore off as she got older?

My aunt, my mother, and my grandmother were the ones doing all the cooking on vacation when we were kids. That was my point. I didn't feel resentment at going out to one nice restaurant a week or ordering pizza. She felt resentment having to cook during a vacation. LoL.

If all the men are sitting around drinking beers on the deck while the women are expected to do all the cooking (happens on my ILs beach vacations) I don't blame your aunt one bit.

Yes. That was pretty much the picture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was growing up, we went to a restaurant on special occasions like birthdays. It was festive and good training for how to behave in that environment. My parents were invariably respectful to the staff and that taught me to be the same.

On vacation, it depended on where we were. Many trips were to visit family so of course we just ate in. The adults would go out to a restaurant one time per trip. Mainly to get away from us, I think! We would also road trip and pack breakfast food for the motel and lunches for the road. Again, once per trip, we would go to a fancy restaurant in the place we were visiting to get a better feel for the place according to my parents. We camped a good deal and learned to make dinner over a camp stove and an open fire.

No, I’m not resentful that I ate a lot of cereal in motel rooms and sandwiches in the station wagon or at a rest stop. My parents knew how to have fun without spending a lot of money. I think it’s a lost art for so many people.

We’ve don’t ever stop for fast food on road trips. I hate feeling awful while confined to a car. I always pack picnics to eat at rest stops, parks, etc. My kids are teens now and we have so many great random picnic memories.

Picnics? Eff that. I'm not packing some basket, finding a rest stop and setting up a buffet. I'll take my family to McDonalds for $20 and save two hours of drive time.

DP. A picnic isn't necessarily a buffet. We make sandwhiches ahead of time and just get them out along with a bag of chips. Finding a rest stop isn't hard, it's right there off the highway, plenty of signs and it always has bathrooms. It also doesn't take 2 hours, is a lot cheaper (how big/old is your family that you only spend $20?!) and is efficient.

[Anonymous]

No. I have done the opposite from my parents as an adult: when we traveled we always went out to eat, and my mom loved to go out to eat once a week and not have to cook when were at home.

When I gained weight as an adult I had to unlearn all those habits of eating out and now take food with us on vacation and cook at home the majority of the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I saw something recently, an article that mentioned someone resenting that their parents never took them out and always brought food from home when they went on vacations.

I’ve been on here about 13/14 years now and see that people still do bring foods to cook while on vacations. I never traveled as a child but I’ve done this as an adult to my own children never realizing this can be a negative memory. Not for every meal but I have taken things like oatmeal, cereal for quick breakfasts in the hotel room.

I did not go out to eat often as a child either, we had little money, single mom household and I loved every second and have fond memories of those times. I could count them on one hand but they were throughly appreciated. I even remember what I ordered.

Depends on the family dynamics, OP. If emotional abuse or even favoritism is involved, “togetherness” could have a very negative connotation, sometimes for life, sadly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My aunt always felt resentful that we only went out to eat once to a nice restaurant. And maybe ordered pizza out. We cooked the rest of the time. It didn't feel like a vacation to her.

Your aunt sounds like an incredibly ungrateful brat. I hope her sense of entitlement wore off as she got older?

My aunt, my mother, and my grandmother were the ones doing all the cooking on vacation when we were kids. That was my point. I didn't feel resentment at going out to one nice restaurant a week or ordering pizza. She felt resentment having to cook during a vacation. LoL.

If all the men are sitting around drinking beers on the deck while the women are expected to do all the cooking (happens on my ILs beach vacations) I don't blame your aunt one bit.

Yes. That was pretty much the picture.

NP. I totally get it. I just went on a trip where we got an Airbnb and I spent a not unsignificant amount of time grocery shopping, cooking, and doing laundry. I won't do it again if I'm thinking I will relax and will only stay in hotels where someone can bring me lunch and a drink by the pool.

[Anonymous]

I got to take some great trips as a kid, but most were to relatives’ houses. We ate fast food on the drive then mostly cooked/ate at the house where we were staying. If we went somewhere like a beach condo, we mostly bought grocery & ate there, but we’d go out once or twice for a nice meal. I’m definitely not resentful of any of that… I really didn’t care where/what we ate; that wasn’t what I enjoyed or mostly remember about the trips.

[Anonymous]

My only good vacation memories are when friends invited me with their families. They were not fancy vacations with fancy good, but we were allowed to be kids and have fun and the parents were kind and got along.

I went on trips to Europe with my parents and mom guilt tripped us constantly about how lucky we were. The menu scared me because if I didn't order the cheapest thing they were livid so at least among appetizers I had more choice. We had to wake at 5am because we were lucky and had to see and do everything. It was all about what they wanted to see and do and again if I didn't say thank you 12 times that day I was in ingrate. And they argued constantly so it was stressful too.

[Anonymous]

Resentful? What a brat. I grew up going on budget family vacations, which often meant we ate most of our meals in a cheap, off season beach house or if we did go out, it was for pizza or one early bird meal.

Now I have kids of my own and can spend whatever I want, and guess what, we still do most of our cooking at home. I don’t want to leave the beach hours early to haul two overtired kids out for a meal. With staffing being what it is, meals out are just more stress than the food is worth. I let my crockpot do the work all day, or I buy simple foods, like chicken tenders and corn on the cob, that can be grilled up quickly while everyone gets showered and changed.