Son wants all-boys birthday party

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

No, the mom can drop the boy off and then go do something 1:1 with her daughter. On her own dime. She doesn't need to impose on the party hosts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son wants an all-boys birthday party but he has a friend whose mom drags the little sister to all the parties.

She’s a sweetheart but we have a limited headcount and she would be the only girl at the party.

Should I just let her tag along anyway or should I tell the mom we only want boys?

The party involves an activity similar to laser tag.

I don't see what her gender has to do with it.

Surely, if your kid is old enough to play laser tag, then it's a drop off party right? Just say "Just a heads up that we can't accommodate siblings due to the headcount, but feel free to drop off!"

I agree. He is being a misygonistic jerk about this.

He's a little boy who wants a boys only party just like girls want only "girls" party! He has lots of time before he can be accused of misygonistic jerk!

Misogyny starts early. He probably gets it from his father.

What’s your take on girls who have girl-only spa parties?

[Anonymous]

Why can’t she just drop son off?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

Of course She doesn’t want to pay for the girl - she is not a guest that her son wants at *his* birthday party.

I am one of the kindest, “more the merrier” people when it fits, but really - “a kindness to the other mother”? What about a kindness to her son, who wants an all boy party with his peers on his birthday? Like to hear it or not, a three year younger sister changes the whole dynamic. It’s all a kindness to her son to set a boundary that allows him to experience his birthday the way he would like. This isn’t a random playground play date.

But can’t you see how the son’s misogyny and male sexism are behind excluding this child based solely on her gender?!?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 2 boys and a girl. Both boys have had all boy birthday parties since second grade.

I have had parents sometimes bring a sibling to drop off or pick up and sibling does not participate. I have thrown multiple laser tag and recently a paintball party. I can’t think of one time a younger sibling joined the arena. I have held laser tag parties both at a venue and in my backyard. One party some people played arcades with siblings. One time we had a backyard laser tag party. Two parents stayed with younger siblings. Oddly everyone else dropped off except the ones who stayed with the siblings. You would think the ones with the siblings would be the ones to leave. Anyways, both younger siblings did not play laser tag and sat in our backyard with their moms.

This is absolutely atrocious horrible parenting because it only promotes gun violence and directly causes school shootings.

I am pp. my kids don’t even play shooting video games. They did love nerf guns and laser tag, which is why we hosted those parties when they were 8-10. We did the paintball in late elementary. Both boys not interested in nerf, laser tag or paintball and have not played since.

I think we will do bowling or top golf this year.

My boys are sweet non violent kids. I am not worried in the slightest about gun violence.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

You’re dragging OP for not wanting to pay for the girl to play laser tag? Of course she doesn’t, the girl isn’t her kid’s friend and isn’t invited.

But, hey, if you like paying for random kids to do stuff, you can do me a kindness by paying my kid’s hockey fees and while you’re at it, you can drive him to his practices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

Of course She doesn’t want to pay for the girl - she is not a guest that her son wants at *his* birthday party.

I am one of the kindest, “more the merrier” people when it fits, but really - “a kindness to the other mother”? What about a kindness to her son, who wants an all boy party with his peers on his birthday? Like to hear it or not, a three year younger sister changes the whole dynamic. It’s all a kindness to her son to set a boundary that allows him to experience his birthday the way he would like. This isn’t a random playground play date.

But can’t you see how the son’s misogyny and male sexism are behind excluding this child based solely on her gender?!?

The birthday boy is 3 years older than the girl. I think it is fine to want all bot/ girl party with friends your own age. Not younger sib

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

Of course She doesn’t want to pay for the girl - she is not a guest that her son wants at *his* birthday party.

I am one of the kindest, “more the merrier” people when it fits, but really - “a kindness to the other mother”? What about a kindness to her son, who wants an all boy party with his peers on his birthday? Like to hear it or not, a three year younger sister changes the whole dynamic. It’s all a kindness to her son to set a boundary that allows him to experience his birthday the way he would like. This isn’t a random playground play date.

But can’t you see how the son’s misogyny and male sexism are behind excluding this child based solely on her gender?!?

The way to view this issue is through the lens of gender equity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 2 boys and a girl. Both boys have had all boy birthday parties since second grade.

I have had parents sometimes bring a sibling to drop off or pick up and sibling does not participate. I have thrown multiple laser tag and recently a paintball party. I can’t think of one time a younger sibling joined the arena. I have held laser tag parties both at a venue and in my backyard. One party some people played arcades with siblings. One time we had a backyard laser tag party. Two parents stayed with younger siblings. Oddly everyone else dropped off except the ones who stayed with the siblings. You would think the ones with the siblings would be the ones to leave. Anyways, both younger siblings did not play laser tag and sat in our backyard with their moms.

This is absolutely atrocious horrible parenting because it only promotes gun violence and directly causes school shootings.

No, it doesn’t. But, most of the school shooters do seem to have weirdo parents who are clueless about kids. 🤔

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

Of course She doesn’t want to pay for the girl - she is not a guest that her son wants at *his* birthday party.

I am one of the kindest, “more the merrier” people when it fits, but really - “a kindness to the other mother”? What about a kindness to her son, who wants an all boy party with his peers on his birthday? Like to hear it or not, a three year younger sister changes the whole dynamic. It’s all a kindness to her son to set a boundary that allows him to experience his birthday the way he would like. This isn’t a random playground play date.

But can’t you see how the son’s misogyny and male sexism are behind excluding this child based solely on her gender?!?

Good grief. The son doesn’t want the girl there because she is 3 years younger, not his friend, and not invited. It sounds like his current closest friends happen to be boys. No where does it say he has anything against girls in general. Elementary kids wanting their friends at their party for their desired activity is not new. Tons of girls want American Girl parties or other traditionally female parties and they don’t want a sibling’s younger brother there either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

Of course She doesn’t want to pay for the girl - she is not a guest that her son wants at *his* birthday party.

I am one of the kindest, “more the merrier” people when it fits, but really - “a kindness to the other mother”? What about a kindness to her son, who wants an all boy party with his peers on his birthday? Like to hear it or not, a three year younger sister changes the whole dynamic. It’s all a kindness to her son to set a boundary that allows him to experience his birthday the way he would like. This isn’t a random playground play date.

But can’t you see how the son’s misogyny and male sexism are behind excluding this child based solely on her gender?!?

Well that and the huge age gap. You need to just let this go. Nobody is buying what you're selling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

Of course She doesn’t want to pay for the girl - she is not a guest that her son wants at *his* birthday party.

I am one of the kindest, “more the merrier” people when it fits, but really - “a kindness to the other mother”? What about a kindness to her son, who wants an all boy party with his peers on his birthday? Like to hear it or not, a three year younger sister changes the whole dynamic. It’s all a kindness to her son to set a boundary that allows him to experience his birthday the way he would like. This isn’t a random playground play date.

But can’t you see how the son’s misogyny and male sexism are behind excluding this child based solely on her gender?!?

🙄

It’s not misogyny to want a boy only party or a girl only party or have a ladies night or have a guys night out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

You’re dragging OP for not wanting to pay for the girl to play laser tag? Of course she doesn’t, the girl isn’t her kid’s friend and isn’t invited.

But, hey, if you like paying for random kids to do stuff, you can do me a kindness by paying my kid’s hockey fees and while you’re at it, you can drive him to his practices.

Did you read the part where the OP said the child’s father isn’t involved and that is why sister goes along everywhere? Omg you people are ruthless and I hope you are treated with the same cruelty you offer others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one kid, regardless of gender. It sounds like you don’t want to pay for her tbh. My son had an all-boys party and two boys brought their sisters (whom we paid for). Think of it as a kindness to the mom.

You’re dragging OP for not wanting to pay for the girl to play laser tag? Of course she doesn’t, the girl isn’t her kid’s friend and isn’t invited.

But, hey, if you like paying for random kids to do stuff, you can do me a kindness by paying my kid’s hockey fees and while you’re at it, you can drive him to his practices.

Did you read the part where the OP said the child’s father isn’t involved and that is why sister goes along everywhere? Omg you people are ruthless and I hope you are treated with the same cruelty you offer others.

A younger sibling should not be tagging along elementary school parties.

My DH is involved but I have 3 kids. I have never invited a sibling along. I have taken a sibling many times to drop off or pick up.

My son is invited to a laser tag party later this month. I will be out of town. DH will likely take our daughter to drop off son at laser tag. DH will likely take daughter to nearby mall for an hour. We are friendly with family. I am sure they will offer Dh and my daughter pizza and cake. Dh will likely feed daughter at mall.

This is really not that hard.

I once had a laser tag party for my son in first grade. We invited our neighbor. Mom RSVPd for one child. It was a public venue so mom brought older daughter. I want to say she was 10 or 11 at the time. I think the mom had already paid for her separately. I would have been totally fine paying for her. She lives 2 doors from us. The older neighbor ended up having the highest score of the whole thing. Older girl did not join for cake or pizza. I don’t know if she kept playing more laser tag or mom left with her and came back to pick up younger child who was part of our party.

There are ways to bring siblings without being rude.

My kindergarten child was invited to a Chuck E. Cheese party. I took my 7yo too. I asked another friend to join him. Birthday mom said my older child could join the party but I said he is having a play date with a friend. He had his own table with pizza with his friend.

Another church e cheese party I had brought younger kid planning to just pay for him. I didn’t rsvp for younger kid. Parent handed him tokens and he just participated in the party.

[Anonymous]

What's weird is people's focus on how it needs to be an "all-boy" party. The birthday boy may be calling it that, but what it really is a party with a limited number of spaces that will be filled by the invited guests and not their siblings.

If it's a public place, there's no way to stop the mother and sister from staying, but it's absolutely legitimate to say "Yes, it's a drop-off party and no, sorry, we can't accommodate siblings this time"