Thoughts on Rives or Sutton for APS SB?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the child is worried about some kind of violence from the parents, wouldn't mandatory reporter rules kick in and the school would have to take steps to protect the kid regardless. If the kid just thinks their parents would disapprove, I am not so sure. Some people may think it is bad that I would take steps to prevent my kids from playing tackle football and disapprove of the sport. Does that mean the school should let my kids be on the team without telling me because my kids fear what my reaction would be? I realize these things are not the same, but I do think reasonable people can disagree about the nuance here and I would be open to voting for someone for SB who would draw the line in a slightly different place than me.

They absolutely should kick in, but they won't. The pronouns crowd wants to have it both ways. They want us to believe that huge swaths of kids are under threat of violence at home, but they don't plan to do anything else about that threat.

They do this because they know that a pronoun disagreement isn't enough to prove parental incompetence in a court of law, and if they even tried to assert that, the political blowback would be extreme.

So instead they just pretend that parental notification is tantamount to violence, and hope that's enough to intimidate people into silent acquiescence.

I haven't heard anyone say they think those numbers are huge, but do go ahead and rely on exaggeration to make your point. Super-credible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the child is worried about some kind of violence from the parents, wouldn't mandatory reporter rules kick in and the school would have to take steps to protect the kid regardless. If the kid just thinks their parents would disapprove, I am not so sure. Some people may think it is bad that I would take steps to prevent my kids from playing tackle football and disapprove of the sport. Does that mean the school should let my kids be on the team without telling me because my kids fear what my reaction would be? I realize these things are not the same, but I do think reasonable people can disagree about the nuance here and I would be open to voting for someone for SB who would draw the line in a slightly different place than me.

Yes, that's why we have child support statutes.

If you polled APS parents, a majority would vote that parents should polled for the school to call them by different pronouns or a different name or to use a different bathroom. And this is the most liberal or second-most liberal school district in the state.

The people on this board wanting to cut parents out are out of touch with APS parents, the State of VA and the US.

Cut parents out of what? Schools have kids for a couple of hours a day for 180 days a year. They aren't replacing parents. If a kid wants to be called something else, what difference does it make?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the child is worried about some kind of violence from the parents, wouldn't mandatory reporter rules kick in and the school would have to take steps to protect the kid regardless. If the kid just thinks their parents would disapprove, I am not so sure. Some people may think it is bad that I would take steps to prevent my kids from playing tackle football and disapprove of the sport. Does that mean the school should let my kids be on the team without telling me because my kids fear what my reaction would be? I realize these things are not the same, but I do think reasonable people can disagree about the nuance here and I would be open to voting for someone for SB who would draw the line in a slightly different place than me.

DCUM is not exactly a community of reasonable people who understand or accept nuance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the child is worried about some kind of violence from the parents, wouldn't mandatory reporter rules kick in and the school would have to take steps to protect the kid regardless. If the kid just thinks their parents would disapprove, I am not so sure. Some people may think it is bad that I would take steps to prevent my kids from playing tackle football and disapprove of the sport. Does that mean the school should let my kids be on the team without telling me because my kids fear what my reaction would be? I realize these things are not the same, but I do think reasonable people can disagree about the nuance here and I would be open to voting for someone for SB who would draw the line in a slightly different place than me.

Yes, that's why we have child support statutes.

If you polled APS parents, a majority would vote that parents should polled for the school to call them by different pronouns or a different name or to use a different bathroom. And this is the most liberal or second-most liberal school district in the state.

The people on this board wanting to cut parents out are out of touch with APS parents, the State of VA and the US.

Cut parents out of what? Schools have kids for a couple of hours a day for 180 days a year. They aren't replacing parents. If a kid wants to be called something else, what difference does it make?

Pleading the alternative: Schools need the right to keep it a secret in case parents are abusive, but also it's no big deal that makes little difference.

If it's not a big deal, then why reserve the right to keep it a secret?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 for nuance

It's so hard as a society to discuss some of this stuff right now. For example, I see the role of parents of elementary kids as very different from those of HS students. If an ES wants to change pronouns, I do think the parents should be told. In HS, that's a different conversation. But it's very hard to say such things publicly because anything not 100% in lockstep gets accused of being hateful.

Always? And how often? If the parents are told and declare that everyone must use a particular pronoun for their child, and the student comes to school and says, "Mommy and Daddy are really mad at me. I wish I could just be Poppy," what then? Do the parents have a right to know? What if you know the parents are fans of reeducation camps for gay kids? Do you still have to tell them?

I'm not a teacher, but I'm guessing lots of parents do things at home that you don't agree with. That could be rules on screens, religious views, diet, bedtimes, etc. But fundamentally, these are still ES kids, and yes, I think parents should know what is going on at school. School counselor could offer to meet with the family, etc. But if my 3rd grader wanted to be called a different name at school, I was a parent would want to know, yes.

DP. How/why is this conversation different than the school catching kids/knowing kids are having sex? Do the schools tell the parents? are they required to? Girl is pregnant and goes to their trusted teacher....now what? Are any of these things fundamentally different?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He didn't seem anti-trans. He seemed anti-AAP.

So he’s against pediatric physicians who are pro-trans. Got it.

He's a psychiatrist who is against the AAP. No thanks!

Pay attn to the AAP. They’ve lost a lot of credibility, unfortunately. I’m voting Rives because I’m also against one party rule. Rives views were much more nuanced than “anti-trans” and anyone claiming that is partisan and playing tribal politics. I do like Bethany and she’s done great work for APS but I don’t see her bringing any added value to the board.

I think that’s fair regarding both of them. Has he provided any updates views? Both medical and social opinion on gender identity has evolved since his 2019 statements. I’m still voting for Sutton but I’m not going to paint him with a broad brush on that 2 minute comment from 3 years ago

Yes he's as anti trans as ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Nuance" is how "anti" groups attempt to veil their biases. But if you ask certain churches that claim "all are welcome" if they have gay people in leadership roles or if they would perform a wedding for a couple in which one member is nonbinary, you find out the truth pretty fast, assuming you can pry a yes-no answer out of them.

Does Rives think a school's first duty is to the well-being of the student, or should parental preferences outweigh that?

I see it as the other way around. Any attempt at a nuanced answer that isn’t lock-step with the prevailing ideas results in accusations of someone being anti trans/racist/whatever. This is done to shut down any true back and forth conversation & maintain control of the preferred narrative.

or maybe you're also anti trans but afraid to come right out and say it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the child is worried about some kind of violence from the parents, wouldn't mandatory reporter rules kick in and the school would have to take steps to protect the kid regardless. If the kid just thinks their parents would disapprove, I am not so sure. Some people may think it is bad that I would take steps to prevent my kids from playing tackle football and disapprove of the sport. Does that mean the school should let my kids be on the team without telling me because my kids fear what my reaction would be? I realize these things are not the same, but I do think reasonable people can disagree about the nuance here and I would be open to voting for someone for SB who would draw the line in a slightly different place than me.

mandatory report of what? that you *think* the parents *might* be violent? don't you need more than that to report?

also there's a lot parents can do to their kids short of actual violence.

[Anonymous]

With the exception of one-off counselors who admit to “forging parental consent” - I think most teachers/staff see parents as essential partners - particularly where it comes to serious issues a student may be nagvigating. I just don’t even see how school leadership wants the liability related to concealing such important information from a parent. Work to make sure a student is protected and safe - definitely. Cut parents out and hide info? I don’t see that going well
for schools.

[Anonymous]

This thread has gotten off track. I choose the candidate who seems more focused on academics and less focused on things like trans issues/CRT/etc. In my opinion, that person in this race is Rives. School should primarily be about teaching children. The social issues are a distraction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread has gotten off track. I choose the candidate who seems more focused on academics and less focused on things like trans issues/CRT/etc. In my opinion, that person in this race is Rives. School should primarily be about teaching children. The social issues are a distraction.

While this is a non-partisan race, only one party is politicizing those issues, and it isn't the Democrats.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread has gotten off track. I choose the candidate who seems more focused on academics and less focused on things like trans issues/CRT/etc. In my opinion, that person in this race is Rives. School should primarily be about teaching children. The social issues are a distraction.

So the candidate who's a longtime volunteer and known in her school community is not focused on teaching children? Gotcha.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread has gotten off track. I choose the candidate who seems more focused on academics and less focused on things like trans issues/CRT/etc. In my opinion, that person in this race is Rives. School should primarily be about teaching children. The social issues are a distraction.

Thank you! I only watched one forum and Sutton was stronger. Did you watch any of the forums? Curious why you think Rives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread has gotten off track. I choose the candidate who seems more focused on academics and less focused on things like trans issues/CRT/etc. In my opinion, that person in this race is Rives. School should primarily be about teaching children. The social issues are a distraction.

While this is a non-partisan race, only one party is politicizing those issues, and it isn't the Democrats.

+1

I'm going to vote for the candidate who is focused on the teaching, not GOP propaganda.

[Anonymous]

My neighbor replaced her Trump sign with a Rives sign, fitting in nicely with her numerous Lipsman and anti-missing middle signs. She has to be more than 90 years old. It’s great to see she’s so invested in choosing future school board members.