Friend attributing my DD's acceptance to her "feeder school"

[Anonymous]

PP. You are so right. This OP is really negative. I hope it's not a parent who is going to end up in my school. We have enough of those already.

[Anonymous]

OP seems fine. It's the friend I was talking about re venting. First reactions to disappointment are bound to be emotional. But it should get better over time and it sounds like this is getting worse.

[Anonymous]

I know that when I am feeling disappointed about the actions/words of a friend, I turn to anonymous posters on DCUM for support and counsel ...

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you for your comments. True, I am venting to an anonymous group, which certainly isn't my usual response to a problem with a friend. I didn't want to tell anyone "real" about it, though, for fear of it becoming a catty gossip item, and it seemed that people on this board may have recently experienced something similar. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

13:56 here. I apologize for my unnecessary and snarky response, OP. I must be having one of those days ... in the future, I'll try to only post when I have something of actual consequence to say!

[Anonymous]

quote]

Yes, inside I would be ticked too...nobody wants to have their child's successes be trivialized, etc. But you have to look deeper here....her friend is trying to make sense of her child's loss. THis is traumatic for her. OP just needs to be patient and hopefully the comments will settle down in due time. Her friend will eventually find a good fit for her DD and life will go on.

Her kid's loss? How can you lose something you never had? And traumatic? Really? You've apparently never experienced a true trauma in your life - otherwise your trauma bar wouldn't be set so low.

OP, your friend is pissed and jealous, and therefore making inappropriate comments. Ask her to stop, then tell her to stop, and if she doesn't, say goodbye.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:quote]

Yes, inside I would be ticked too...nobody wants to have their child's successes be trivialized, etc. But you have to look deeper here....her friend is trying to make sense of her child's loss. THis is traumatic for her. OP just needs to be patient and hopefully the comments will settle down in due time. Her friend will eventually find a good fit for her DD and life will go on.

Her kid's loss? How can you lose something you never had? And traumatic? Really? You've apparently never experienced a true trauma in your life - otherwise your trauma bar wouldn't be set so low.

OP, your friend is pissed and jealous, and therefore making inappropriate comments. Ask her to stop, then tell her to stop, and if she doesn't, say goodbye.

Actually, I lost my mother at a young age so have quite a bit of perspective on the matter. Anways, I was just trying to convey that her friend is feeling a sense of loss on some level. Maybe I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. People get ugly sometimes when they are upset but it doesn't mean they are bad people and not worthy of your friendship. But, you're right...her friend is pissed and jealous and making in appropriate comments.

OP, I think maybe if she brings it up again you can just say, "I think we need to move on from the school topics....it's making us both upset". HOpefully she'll get the message.

[Anonymous]

I had to read the OP three times before I realized that the school her child got into was an *elementary school*. I had assumed we were talking about college.

Yikes. The OP's friend is gonna have a long hard life if she's already freaking out about this kind of thing.

[Anonymous]

I wanted to point out that there are no guarantees that the feeder school would have accepted her friend's DD to begin with. Those preschools can be competitive in their own right!