The college essay

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I always enjoy posters that get the vapors over a parent writing an essay and “harming other kids” while paying an essay “consultant” for their own kid. I love this place.

I’m the “cheater” and I think it’s funny too. I also like how they hire consultants to help with applications, deadlines, etc. It’s all so hypocritical. All I did was heavily edit a bs essay. There is not a single poster on this thread without “sin.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d bet my bottom dollar that the large majority of the sanctimonious parents on this thread chiding those of us who had heavy hands in their kids’ essays are paying for private schools and SAT prep courses and doing everything else that their money can buy to better position their kids for college admissions. Essays, in contrast, are just a bs requirement that nobody really cares about unless you have a truly compelling personal story.

In my kids’ case, I didn’t “brainstorm” with my kids for ideas like many of you say you did. We all know that “brainstorm” means “plant the idea in my kid’s head on what to write, then claim it was their idea.” Basically my kids showed me their essays, and I was like “no, no, no” and edited the hell out of it. That’s what I mean when I said I “basically” wrote it. Whatever.

Public school. Yes, paid for SAT prep.

Each one of us has a compelling personal story (you're telling yours here).
I think the essay is a good college entrance requirement since they'll be writing more of those when they get there.

No, they won’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Every poster on this thread is too involved and invested in their kid’s college applications. I’m just the only one being honest.

DP. Nope, you are wrong. Most of us didn’t “basically” write our kids’ essays. You are a cheater doing gymnastics to rationalize it, like cheaters do. Do you cheat on your spouse, too? No way your character defect is limited to college applications.

I am not doing any “gymnastics” at all. I am being brutally and 100% honest: I heavily edited an essay that my kid wrote after choosing her own topic with no help from me. And I have no quibbles or guilty feelings about it. Another poster was horrified at the idea I did that, suggesting that she only “pointed out things for her applicant to fix.“ What the hell is the difference? The other kid would not have known there was anything to fix if the mother hadn’t pointed it out. What’s the difference between saying “fix this“ and just fixing it yourself?

You’re all splitting hairs and trying to paint yourselves as morally superior but you ain’t. I didn’t send my kid to private school, I didn’t pay for SAT preps, I didn’t pick their classes and I didn’t hide no damned consultants or fill out their applications. I edited their unimportant essays to cut them a break. I was less involved in their applications than the vast majority of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your DC asked for help, then give some help. Having them read it out loud to you goes a long way for finding things that are awkward. Fix the worst grammar errors or point out places to improve flow. That’s what the English teacher would be doing. Don’t suggest lots of wording changes or restructure it completely - you’ll lose DC’s voice. For most colleges, it really won’t be the most important thing.

And to PP who said they wrote most of it for 2 kids - I salute you. The only place that I really think the essays matter is for very selective schools. This is where I think it’s most important for students to write their own essay, and also where I’m sure the most paid for essays are submitted. My DC1 wrote a crappy 1st cut essay that he refused to edit and got into state flagship on strength of SAT scores. DC2 wrote amazing essays that I never saw and was accepted at several top schools. Writing is the current bane of DC3. Has difficulty starting because they have a bazillion ideas and can’t pick one. Then, if left on own will produce 3 times as much writing as needed and then can’t edit down. Did I sit down this weekend and ask them a series of questions, typing their answers, to get something outlined as a start? Yes. They are supposed to do some more editing in the next week. Will I likely be sitting down again to help refine? Yes. They aren’t applying to top schools, the essay is a BS requirement generally IMO, and I’m over it.

+1M

Well, it's a BS requirement but not because of what you think but because most are never read. The readers first cull through the applications sorting for GPA, rigor, test scores, ECs, POC, URM, first-generation and so on. The average applicaiton to a slac gets a six minute read. Only the very best make it to the regional coordinators who actually might read the essay.

I’m PP who said the essay was a BS requirement, and I meant it for the reasons you state. DS1 got into state flagship purely on his SAT score. His 3.5 GPA, non-existent ECs, and poor essay certainly didn’t do it. And yes, he had friends with better GPA and ECs, but lower SAT scores who did not get in. That fact taught me a lot about the process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d bet my bottom dollar that the large majority of the sanctimonious parents on this thread chiding those of us who had heavy hands in their kids’ essays are paying for private schools and SAT prep courses and doing everything else that their money can buy to better position their kids for college admissions. Essays, in contrast, are just a bs requirement that nobody really cares about unless you have a truly compelling personal story.

In my kids’ case, I didn’t “brainstorm” with my kids for ideas like many of you say you did. We all know that “brainstorm” means “plant the idea in my kid’s head on what to write, then claim it was their idea.” Basically my kids showed me their essays, and I was like “no, no, no” and edited the hell out of it. That’s what I mean when I said I “basically” wrote it. Whatever.

Public school. Yes, paid for SAT prep.

Each one of us has a compelling personal story (you're telling yours here).
I think the essay is a good college entrance requirement since they'll be writing more of those when they get there.

No, they won’t.

Did your kids not write essays in college? What did they do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d bet my bottom dollar that the large majority of the sanctimonious parents on this thread chiding those of us who had heavy hands in their kids’ essays are paying for private schools and SAT prep courses and doing everything else that their money can buy to better position their kids for college admissions. Essays, in contrast, are just a bs requirement that nobody really cares about unless you have a truly compelling personal story.

In my kids’ case, I didn’t “brainstorm” with my kids for ideas like many of you say you did. We all know that “brainstorm” means “plant the idea in my kid’s head on what to write, then claim it was their idea.” Basically my kids showed me their essays, and I was like “no, no, no” and edited the hell out of it. That’s what I mean when I said I “basically” wrote it. Whatever.

Public school. Yes, paid for SAT prep.

Each one of us has a compelling personal story (you're telling yours here).
I think the essay is a good college entrance requirement since they'll be writing more of those when they get there.

No, they won’t.

Did your kids not write essays in college? What did they do?

I’m sure they did. I never asked. I’m not obsessed with my kids’ college classes and am not much of a helicopter parent. But it’s not like their college essays were the only thing they wrote in high school (or didn’t write lol).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d bet my bottom dollar that the large majority of the sanctimonious parents on this thread chiding those of us who had heavy hands in their kids’ essays are paying for private schools and SAT prep courses and doing everything else that their money can buy to better position their kids for college admissions. Essays, in contrast, are just a bs requirement that nobody really cares about unless you have a truly compelling personal story.

In my kids’ case, I didn’t “brainstorm” with my kids for ideas like many of you say you did. We all know that “brainstorm” means “plant the idea in my kid’s head on what to write, then claim it was their idea.” Basically my kids showed me their essays, and I was like “no, no, no” and edited the hell out of it. That’s what I mean when I said I “basically” wrote it. Whatever.

Public school. Yes, paid for SAT prep.

Each one of us has a compelling personal story (you're telling yours here).
I think the essay is a good college entrance requirement since they'll be writing more of those when they get there.

No, they won’t.

Did your kids not write essays in college? What did they do?

I’m sure they did. I never asked. I’m not obsessed with my kids’ college classes and am not much of a helicopter parent. But it’s not like their college essays were the only thing they wrote in high school (or didn’t write lol).

You aren't much of a helicopter parent except for when you are writing their college application essay! Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I secretly wanted to write my kid’s essays but both absolutely refused my input. Glad they did it on their own . . . both of them wrote killer essays in their own voice and were very proud of themselves. My best advice is back off and let them shine (or not) on their own. You don’t want to send the message that they aren’t capable of doing this thing. Plus there’s the bigger issue of integrity and honesty.

Very good points.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d bet my bottom dollar that the large majority of the sanctimonious parents on this thread chiding those of us who had heavy hands in their kids’ essays are paying for private schools and SAT prep courses and doing everything else that their money can buy to better position their kids for college admissions. Essays, in contrast, are just a bs requirement that nobody really cares about unless you have a truly compelling personal story.

In my kids’ case, I didn’t “brainstorm” with my kids for ideas like many of you say you did. We all know that “brainstorm” means “plant the idea in my kid’s head on what to write, then claim it was their idea.” Basically my kids showed me their essays, and I was like “no, no, no” and edited the hell out of it. That’s what I mean when I said I “basically” wrote it. Whatever.

Public school. Yes, paid for SAT prep.

Each one of us has a compelling personal story (you're telling yours here).
I think the essay is a good college entrance requirement since they'll be writing more of those when they get there.

No, they won’t.

Did your kids not write essays in college? What did they do?

I’m sure they did. I never asked. I’m not obsessed with my kids’ college classes and am not much of a helicopter parent. But it’s not like their college essays were the only thing they wrote in high school (or didn’t write lol).

You aren't much of a helicopter parent except for when you are writing their college application essay! Lol.

Ha ha other than that! I’m ok with myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on the kid. For one or two of mine, I basically wrote their essays. Whatever. They have very little impact on college admissions for most kids.

I think I know your kid. Cheated when she could in college. Basically had a friend writing her thesis for her the night before graduation. The parents were there in town to celebrate and pretended not to see what was going on.
Your kid got a job thru the recommendation of a friend. Job was low profile, essentially admin work. Once the recession hit and she was in her late 30s she was laid off with no career advancement to show for her time at low level job. Best she could hope for was a hubby to lean on.

[Anonymous]

My SIL in India is a media professional. She was in need for extra cash and was given the task of writing essays (completely made up BS) for students in Middle East who were applying to US college. She was appalled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Every poster on this thread is too involved and invested in their kid’s college applications. I’m just the only one being honest.

DP. Nope, you are wrong. Most of us didn’t “basically” write our kids’ essays. You are a cheater doing gymnastics to rationalize it, like cheaters do. Do you cheat on your spouse, too? No way your character defect is limited to college applications.

I am not doing any “gymnastics” at all. I am being brutally and 100% honest: I heavily edited an essay that my kid wrote after choosing her own topic with no help from me. And I have no quibbles or guilty feelings about it. Another poster was horrified at the idea I did that, suggesting that she only “pointed out things for her applicant to fix.“ What the hell is the difference? The other kid would not have known there was anything to fix if the mother hadn’t pointed it out. What’s the difference between saying “fix this“ and just fixing it yourself?

You’re all splitting hairs and trying to paint yourselves as morally superior but you ain’t. I didn’t send my kid to private school, I didn’t pay for SAT preps, I didn’t pick their classes and I didn’t hide no damned consultants or fill out their applications. I edited their unimportant essays to cut them a break. I was less involved in their applications than the vast majority of you.

It might have been better to not get involved in the children's essays given the evident challenges with grammar here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends on the kid. For one or two of mine, I basically wrote their essays. Whatever. They have very little impact on college admissions for most kids.

I think I know your kid. Cheated when she could in college. Basically had a friend writing her thesis for her the night before graduation. The parents were there in town to celebrate and pretended not to see what was going on.
Your kid got a job thru the recommendation of a friend. Job was low profile, essentially admin work. Once the recession hit and she was in her late 30s she was laid off with no career advancement to show for her time at low level job. Best she could hope for was a hubby to lean on.

Nice try! But wrong. The kids are great and have very good jobs thanks to the college education that they received and that would have happened whether or not I wrote their essays.

Sorry to disappoint!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Every poster on this thread is too involved and invested in their kid’s college applications. I’m just the only one being honest.

DP. Nope, you are wrong. Most of us didn’t “basically” write our kids’ essays. You are a cheater doing gymnastics to rationalize it, like cheaters do. Do you cheat on your spouse, too? No way your character defect is limited to college applications.

I am not doing any “gymnastics” at all. I am being brutally and 100% honest: I heavily edited an essay that my kid wrote after choosing her own topic with no help from me. And I have no quibbles or guilty feelings about it. Another poster was horrified at the idea I did that, suggesting that she only “pointed out things for her applicant to fix.“ What the hell is the difference? The other kid would not have known there was anything to fix if the mother hadn’t pointed it out. What’s the difference between saying “fix this“ and just fixing it yourself?

You’re all splitting hairs and trying to paint yourselves as morally superior but you ain’t. I didn’t send my kid to private school, I didn’t pay for SAT preps, I didn’t pick their classes and I didn’t hide no damned consultants or fill out their applications. I edited their unimportant essays to cut them a break. I was less involved in their applications than the vast majority of you.

It might have been better to not get involved in the children's essays given the evident challenges with grammar here.

When all else fails, be the grammar police. I’m dictating on my phone from my second home without proofreading. I’m not writing a college essay at the moment so no worries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My SIL in India is a media professional. She was in need for extra cash and was given the task of writing essays (completely made up BS) for students in Middle East who were applying to US college. She was appalled.

As well she should have been. That’s a far different thing than I did.