Sorority rush - please make it sound appealing to me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD rushed last year and I was in a sorority.

I preface this all by saying, neither of us rushed in the South. That's a whole different ballgame that I know nothing about.

It also varies by school but for DD (VA Tech) They suggest what type of outfit to wear for each day of rush. It gets more formal the further you get into rush. After each round you list you get to drop a certain # and the sororities drop a certain #. It goes on like this each round until you get down to 2. You rank them 1 and 2 and the sororities do the same. Yes, you may not get your top choice. You may not even get your second choice but I think that's pretty rare. If you don't like the bid you end with you don't have to take it.

Rush is a stressful process because what ends up happening is that all the girls tend to be most attracted to the "top" houses, which are the sororities that mix with the "top" fraternities. The problem with your average college freshman is that in those houses, you need to have connections, usually people from your high school (usually private) who get you in. Even if you go in thinking you don't care and you don't even know if you want to pledge anywhere, you often will "fall in love" with a house because you liked the girls you spoke to or all your friends are hoping to go there too, and unfortunately they may not fall in love with you. My DD is happy where she ended up but it was hell to go through for sure. Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you look at it, she was dropped by all the houses she thought she loved after the first day, save one. When she called me in tears, I reminded her that she had called me after she met with this one house and asked me if Id ever heard of it before because she really loved the girls but just knew nothing about them. Since that was the only one she liked left, she really only focused on that one house to tell me how much she liked the girls. She just had never heard of them before so didn't know anything about them. The rest of rush ended up fine as that house is where she got a bid. It was heartbreaking for her and several of her friends to be cut from places they thought they had a good connection with but, if you asked all of them now, they ended up in the right house for them, and it really does usually work out that way. Today my DD would say she is so thankful that she didn't end up in the ones she thought were her first choice going in.

You do not need to accept a bid, and you can drop out of rush at any time. Even if you accept a bid, you can check it out and then drop if you don't like it.

Wow. I had two girls rush at UVA and it was not "stressful" for them at all. Not even a little.

I’m the pp and my kid did rush at Uva and it was stressful. She and 3-4 of her friends were crushed early on but then it worked out, her best friend got dropped on the last day from her moms house (uva legacy). So yeah tough, but then it’s over and it all worked out. I rushed at at Slac and it was fine, but I had friends in the house I wanted and it wasn’t nearly as competitive.

Would the roommate have been a good fit in moms sorority though honestly, looking back at it? Being a legacy is awesome but if you are (for instance) a vegan and moms sorority thinks vegans are dumb, that would be a long and unfun 4 years.

i dont' personally think she would and she LOVES the one that did pick her, but she almost dropped out when she got cut as a legacy. As I said, it always works out. She and all of my DD's friends are much happier where they ended up but the process had alot of tears.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you planning to rush or is your kid?

My first thought!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At UMD, some sororities also participated in “dirty rush” by telling PNMs to suicide their house (only rank that one house), knowing that they girls weren’t high enough to get a bid. Then they would contact them under the guise of COB (continuous open bidding) and snap them up. It was a way to ensure they got all of the girls they wanted. Unfortunately, some girls always went that route and then didn’t get the bid later on, and they were usually the ones who invested so much into that one particular house that there wasn’t another house interested.

I am so confused by this (and I was in a sorority in college!). I get the gist is that this is against the spirit of the rules and hurts the girls rushing, but I cannot follow this.

OP, where is your dd going to college? The process can be very different if you are talking Colgate vs UGA, for examples.

I went to a different college and this isnt what dirty rush meant at my school either. At the school that I attended, dirty rush was when sororities wouldnt follow the rules panhellinic set out for fairness during rush. For instance sorority members werent supposed to socialize w rushees outside of the rush process during rush, so that the whole process was fair to everyone—everyone pledging got a chance to meet every sorority in the same way everyone else did under the same time constraints of one hour/party/day. At my school AOPi was the sorority with the prettiest girls and they would often dirty rush other hot chicks. Make sure the hot chicks met everyone outside of formal rush process, etc.

Dirty rush as its used mostly means contact with houses prior to rush and possibly bid promising. The convoluted story about being told to suicide is not considered dirty rush but it is certainly against the rules. If you suicide bid and don't get a bid, then you are eligible for COB and snap bidding after the end of formal rush. So i bet there are houses that use that as a way to ensure they get everyone that they want but certainly it is not the way its supposed to be done.

Most of the time girls do not suicide bid, but if you end up getting a bid from the house you didn't want, you won't accept it but then you can't participate in rush again until the next year. If you suicide and get no bid, you can do COB immediately after bid day so alot of girls do do that because they think they might have a shot at COB and don't want to miss out on a whole year before they can rush again. At UVA for example, last year, most of the houses picked up several kids via COB. I think only one house didn't participate. My DD knows several friends who did COB and got into houses they had been dropped from during the formal rush process so it's a good option.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter will be a freshman in a couple of weeks and isn't sure if she's interested in going greek or not. I was never in a sorority (my college didn't have them), so I can't really advise either way. I told her to make friends freshman year and see what those friends are planning to do. She can decide to rush or not for sophomore year. It does sound like a huge time suck and pretty silly. OTOH, it could be a lot of fun.

My DD went into school not sold on rushing either but then everyone on her hall did and it seemed like fun to check it all out. It worked out and she loves her sorority and is excited to participate in some leadership positions this year. It is really not a big time suck, unless boys rush and pledging, it was an absolute breeze for her and all fun, once she got through rush itself. The only negative I saw is that her hall had been very close all fall and into spring but then when they rushed, they all ended up in different houses and they tended to go their separate ways. No one else on my DD's hall was in her sorority, so she felt a little sad that she lost that closeness with some of them as they got to know their new sisters, but in the end, they are still friends and I think that will continue this year (sophomore). Just a warning that that can happen and those great friends from freshman fall might end up spending less time there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Isn’t Greek life mostly a southern thing? The whole thing smacks of backwater.

In all honesty, before I rushed I tried to make friends with people just by talking about how superior I am to them in every way, but that didn’t work. Do you have any tips? Clearly condescension has worked so well for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At UMD, some sororities also participated in “dirty rush” by telling PNMs to suicide their house (only rank that one house), knowing that they girls weren’t high enough to get a bid. Then they would contact them under the guise of COB (continuous open bidding) and snap them up. It was a way to ensure they got all of the girls they wanted. Unfortunately, some girls always went that route and then didn’t get the bid later on, and they were usually the ones who invested so much into that one particular house that there wasn’t another house interested.

I am so confused by this (and I was in a sorority in college!). I get the gist is that this is against the spirit of the rules and hurts the girls rushing, but I cannot follow this.

OP, where is your dd going to college? The process can be very different if you are talking Colgate vs UGA, for examples.

I went to a different college and this isnt what dirty rush meant at my school either. At the school that I attended, dirty rush was when sororities wouldnt follow the rules panhellinic set out for fairness during rush. For instance sorority members werent supposed to socialize w rushees outside of the rush process during rush, so that the whole process was fair to everyone—everyone pledging got a chance to meet every sorority in the same way everyone else did under the same time constraints of one hour/party/day. At my school AOPi was the sorority with the prettiest girls and they would often dirty rush other hot chicks. Make sure the hot chicks met everyone outside of formal rush process, etc.

Dirty rush as its used mostly means contact with houses prior to rush and possibly bid promising. The convoluted story about being told to suicide is not considered dirty rush but it is certainly against the rules. If you suicide bid and don't get a bid, then you are eligible for COB and snap bidding after the end of formal rush. So i bet there are houses that use that as a way to ensure they get everyone that they want but certainly it is not the way its supposed to be done.

Most of the time girls do not suicide bid, but if you end up getting a bid from the house you didn't want, you won't accept it but then you can't participate in rush again until the next year. If you suicide and get no bid, you can do COB immediately after bid day so alot of girls do do that because they think they might have a shot at COB and don't want to miss out on a whole year before they can rush again. At UVA for example, last year, most of the houses picked up several kids via COB. I think only one house didn't participate. My DD knows several friends who did COB and got into houses they had been dropped from during the formal rush process so it's a good option.

I dont know what cob means, but when I rushed I was dropped by the sorority I really wanted and received a bid from one I did not want. I declined it, but the sorority I did want still had spots and I hadnt accepted the bid so I joined my pledge class that year, I didnt have to wait a year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At UMD, some sororities also participated in “dirty rush” by telling PNMs to suicide their house (only rank that one house), knowing that they girls weren’t high enough to get a bid. Then they would contact them under the guise of COB (continuous open bidding) and snap them up. It was a way to ensure they got all of the girls they wanted. Unfortunately, some girls always went that route and then didn’t get the bid later on, and they were usually the ones who invested so much into that one particular house that there wasn’t another house interested.

I am so confused by this (and I was in a sorority in college!). I get the gist is that this is against the spirit of the rules and hurts the girls rushing, but I cannot follow this.

OP, where is your dd going to college? The process can be very different if you are talking Colgate vs UGA, for examples.

I went to a different college and this isnt what dirty rush meant at my school either. At the school that I attended, dirty rush was when sororities wouldnt follow the rules panhellinic set out for fairness during rush. For instance sorority members werent supposed to socialize w rushees outside of the rush process during rush, so that the whole process was fair to everyone—everyone pledging got a chance to meet every sorority in the same way everyone else did under the same time constraints of one hour/party/day. At my school AOPi was the sorority with the prettiest girls and they would often dirty rush other hot chicks. Make sure the hot chicks met everyone outside of formal rush process, etc.

Dirty rush as its used mostly means contact with houses prior to rush and possibly bid promising. The convoluted story about being told to suicide is not considered dirty rush but it is certainly against the rules. If you suicide bid and don't get a bid, then you are eligible for COB and snap bidding after the end of formal rush. So i bet there are houses that use that as a way to ensure they get everyone that they want but certainly it is not the way its supposed to be done.

Most of the time girls do not suicide bid, but if you end up getting a bid from the house you didn't want, you won't accept it but then you can't participate in rush again until the next year. If you suicide and get no bid, you can do COB immediately after bid day so alot of girls do do that because they think they might have a shot at COB and don't want to miss out on a whole year before they can rush again. At UVA for example, last year, most of the houses picked up several kids via COB. I think only one house didn't participate. My DD knows several friends who did COB and got into houses they had been dropped from during the formal rush process so it's a good option.

I dont know what cob means, but when I rushed I was dropped by the sorority I really wanted and received a bid from one I did not want. I declined it, but the sorority I did want still had spots and I hadnt accepted the bid so I joined my pledge class that year, I didnt have to wait a year.

Yep that’s COB, “continuous open bidding” but it depends the sxhool if you turn down a bid when you can rush again or do COB.

[Anonymous]

Test

[Anonymous]

Can't believe this hasn't been posted yet.
This is from the University of Maryland. Apparently, this is from the chair of a 'lower tier, very awkward sorority' that's been matched up with a 'pretty good frat' for Greek Week."


"If you just opened this like I told you to, tie yourself down to whatever chair you're sitting in, because this email is going to be a rough f++g ride.

For those of you that have your heads stuck under rocks, which apparently is the majority of this chapter, we have been F$&-+G UP in terms of night time events and general social interactions with Sigma Nu. I've been getting texts on texts about people LITERALLY being so f-ng AWKWARD and so f++g BORING. If you're reading this right now and saying to yourself "But oh em gee [first name redacted], I've been having so much fun with my sisters this week!", then punch yourself in the face right now so that I don't have to f&6&ng find you on campus to do it myself.". Link to full letter doesn't seem I can link it. Google, sorority girl letter deadspin

[Anonymous]

To be honest I was vaguely horrified when my DD told me she was going to give Rush a try. I stayed far away from that in college and assumed she would too just because of her general sensibilities. She is at a Northern/urban school and Greek life isn’t a particularly big deal but some people do seem to take rush very seriously. Anyway she ended up getting a bid at a sorority that she thought she had zero interest in but it’s one that’s working very hard to change its “exclusive” image and has actively become much more diverse in multiple ways in recent years. Her Rush experience was this past Jan/Feb and so was virtual due to covid surge at that time. For her that was a good thing, all the “rounds” were easier to manage than if she had had to run around to a lot of events. I think the reason it wasn’t especially stressful for her (or for me by extension) is she really approached it from the point of view of just being curious and didn’t really care about the outcome. I don’t imagine being in the sorority is going to be a central part of her identity, she’s just seeing it as a way to continue to build social and professional networks. But fortunately she hasn’t spent any money at all on outfits or any of that nonsense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To be honest I was vaguely horrified when my DD told me she was going to give Rush a try. I stayed far away from that in college and assumed she would too just because of her general sensibilities. She is at a Northern/urban school and Greek life isn’t a particularly big deal but some people do seem to take rush very seriously. Anyway she ended up getting a bid at a sorority that she thought she had zero interest in but it’s one that’s working very hard to change its “exclusive” image and has actively become much more diverse in multiple ways in recent years. Her Rush experience was this past Jan/Feb and so was virtual due to covid surge at that time. For her that was a good thing, all the “rounds” were easier to manage than if she had had to run around to a lot of events. I think the reason it wasn’t especially stressful for her (or for me by extension) is she really approached it from the point of view of just being curious and didn’t really care about the outcome. I don’t imagine being in the sorority is going to be a central part of her identity, she’s just seeing it as a way to continue to build social and professional networks. But fortunately she hasn’t spent any money at all on outfits or any of that nonsense.

If she is at a Northern school, even if it wasnt virtual, I imagine that she wouldnt have to get a whole new wardrobe for rush. I remember buying a new dress or two for the last few nights but otherwise I just wore what I already owned and it was fine. That said, Im not the kind of person to, for example, regularly do keratin treatments or use bronzer/highlighter as part of my makeup routine. So the houses that catered to women more interested in makeup and fashion were like that werent interested in me, nor me them, no matter whether I had a new outfit or not.

[Anonymous]

Sorority girls are the ultimate “pick me” girls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can't believe this hasn't been posted yet.
This is from the University of Maryland. Apparently, this is from the chair of a 'lower tier, very awkward sorority' that's been matched up with a 'pretty good frat' for Greek Week."


"If you just opened this like I told you to, tie yourself down to whatever chair you're sitting in, because this email is going to be a rough f++g ride.

For those of you that have your heads stuck under rocks, which apparently is the majority of this chapter, we have been F$&-+G UP in terms of night time events and general social interactions with Sigma Nu. I've been getting texts on texts about people LITERALLY being so f-ng AWKWARD and so f++g BORING. If you're reading this right now and saying to yourself "But oh em gee [first name redacted], I've been having so much fun with my sisters this week!", then punch yourself in the face right now so that I don't have to f&6&ng find you on campus to do it myself.". Link to full letter doesn't seem I can link it. Google, sorority girl letter deadspin

I just googled---that was in 2012.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The whole thing is a laughingstock to the rest of the world who care to know of its existence. Which would be funny if the participants weren't so convinced of their own superiority, which ultimately makes the whole thing a bit sad. "We're laughing at you, not with you," as it were. I would personally avoid.

This. And people on DCUM trip over themselves to defend it, because being in an idiotic sorority was the highlight of their sad little lives and they still cling to it 20-30 years later.

Never fails to make me laugh at comments like this on a site where so many are obsessed with the inane nonsense that is travel sports.

[Anonymous]

Nothing appealing about it except maybe they have to learn social skills in a trial by fire.

I went through rush at a big school and pledged but then managed to avoid rush as an active because it was so stupid. I did pay fines.