Am I doing my 5yo a disservice by not having him in activities?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's an issue at all to keep a 5 year old out of activities. My kids have never made lasting friendships from sports teams. They are friendly and play with others during the season, but we've never carried that relationship beyond the team. I don't think sports teams are good for making lasting friends in this area.

Regarding talent, you could sit out one year and be fine. But, yes, you will be behind other kids who play continuously. But, at that age, if he starts playing again next year, and he is truly somewhat talented, he'll pick it back up really easy. I think you have until about age 9 to try different sports before needing to stick with one if you intend to try and make high school teams.

This may be true for rec sports but once your kid does travel, you'll see how close they become with those friends. FWIW--my kid is on a competitive travel team in a sport they'd never tried till 3rd grade. Sports are good but sitting out K year is fine.

It will also ensure that your kid has no friends who aren’t travel sport friends which makes for a dull kid and locks them into that activity. It also ensures that the family builds their life around the kid and their activities which is oh so healthy. Oh and if you have another child they will have to: join the same sport (for efficiency sake), be dragged every weekend to their siblings activity or grow up with a family that is rarely together as a unit because of Larla’s travel team (especially if child #2 chooses a different path).

Not PP but this is absurd. My travel sport kid has friends from his neighborhood, school, church and yes, his sports team. He also plays in the orchestra and performs monthly community service. We still do all the family things - vacations, board game nights, pumpkin patches. And yes, he has siblings who also have their time consuming activities, none of which involve the same sport he does. It’s all good but yes, busy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes kids age out of playground in the next few years.

This is very true. For us it was around 2nd grade. Enjoy the prek through 2 years at the playground though! We were there nearly every day after school and it was the best - fresh air, play and friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes kids age out of playground in the next few years.

This is very true. For us it was around 2nd grade. Enjoy the prek through 2 years at the playground though! We were there nearly every day after school and it was the best - fresh air, play and friends.

Plenty of things kids can do to stay active and have fun that do not involve a playground.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. It’s better for kids not to be in structured activities before age of 7.

https://www.edweek.org/teaching-learning/study-too-many-structured-activities-may-hinder-childrens-executive-functioning/2014/07?fbclid=IwAR1TQlJckfXLFd3y-dHSuXZl6Jb1ql2M1YqG_YR98bFoXZFqwvaUWJyADlA

I might make an exception if my child really wanted to do something but absent that will not be signing her up for any.

No. It's better for kids not to be overwhelmed with structured activities. Nothing there says that rec soccer with 1 practice and 1 game per week is going to hinder your kid.

Still they are completely unnecessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's an issue at all to keep a 5 year old out of activities. My kids have never made lasting friendships from sports teams. They are friendly and play with others during the season, but we've never carried that relationship beyond the team. I don't think sports teams are good for making lasting friends in this area.

Regarding talent, you could sit out one year and be fine. But, yes, you will be behind other kids who play continuously. But, at that age, if he starts playing again next year, and he is truly somewhat talented, he'll pick it back up really easy. I think you have until about age 9 to try different sports before needing to stick with one if you intend to try and make high school teams.

This may be true for rec sports but once your kid does travel, you'll see how close they become with those friends. FWIW--my kid is on a competitive travel team in a sport they'd never tried till 3rd grade. Sports are good but sitting out K year is fine.

It will also ensure that your kid has no friends who aren’t travel sport friends which makes for a dull kid and locks them into that activity. It also ensures that the family builds their life around the kid and their activities which is oh so healthy. Oh and if you have another child they will have to: join the same sport (for efficiency sake), be dragged every weekend to their siblings activity or grow up with a family that is rarely together as a unit because of Larla’s travel team (especially if child #2 chooses a different path).

You don't need to do travel (abd all the money and time it requires) to still enjoy and be good at a sport.

DD, now 11, has been playing rec league soccer since Kindergarten. She likes the standard weekday practice + local Sat game b/c it allows ger to still do other things. And so do I (especially since we have subsequent kids in tow).

I don't get the hype around or the presumption that your kid will play travel-level sport just b/c he's registered to play a rec league in kindergarten.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's an issue at all to keep a 5 year old out of activities. My kids have never made lasting friendships from sports teams. They are friendly and play with others during the season, but we've never carried that relationship beyond the team. I don't think sports teams are good for making lasting friends in this area.

Regarding talent, you could sit out one year and be fine. But, yes, you will be behind other kids who play continuously. But, at that age, if he starts playing again next year, and he is truly somewhat talented, he'll pick it back up really easy. I think you have until about age 9 to try different sports before needing to stick with one if you intend to try and make high school teams.

This may be true for rec sports but once your kid does travel, you'll see how close they become with those friends. FWIW--my kid is on a competitive travel team in a sport they'd never tried till 3rd grade. Sports are good but sitting out K year is fine.

It will also ensure that your kid has no friends who aren’t travel sport friends which makes for a dull kid and locks them into that activity. It also ensures that the family builds their life around the kid and their activities which is oh so healthy. Oh and if you have another child they will have to: join the same sport (for efficiency sake), be dragged every weekend to their siblings activity or grow up with a family that is rarely together as a unit because of Larla’s travel team (especially if child #2 chooses a different path).

You don't need to do travel (abd all the money and time it requires) to still enjoy and be good at a sport.

DD, now 11, has been playing rec league soccer since Kindergarten. She likes the standard weekday practice + local Sat game b/c it allows ger to still do other things. And so do I (especially since we have subsequent kids in tow).

I don't get the hype around or the presumption that your kid will play travel-level sport just b/c he's registered to play a rec league in kindergarten.

Because that's what alot of parents will do whether their kids wants to or not. They wabt their kids to play sports no matter what. Also, rec sports end super early. It's like older kids are less deserving of fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Learning to swim is important. Reading also. Otherwise let him enjoy some time as a child.

This. Year-round swim lessons until a strong, confident swimmer (whatever the age) is non-negotiable. So is reading. Everything else is gravy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's an issue at all to keep a 5 year old out of activities. My kids have never made lasting friendships from sports teams. They are friendly and play with others during the season, but we've never carried that relationship beyond the team. I don't think sports teams are good for making lasting friends in this area.

Regarding talent, you could sit out one year and be fine. But, yes, you will be behind other kids who play continuously. But, at that age, if he starts playing again next year, and he is truly somewhat talented, he'll pick it back up really easy. I think you have until about age 9 to try different sports before needing to stick with one if you intend to try and make high school teams.

This may be true for rec sports but once your kid does travel, you'll see how close they become with those friends. FWIW--my kid is on a competitive travel team in a sport they'd never tried till 3rd grade. Sports are good but sitting out K year is fine.

It will also ensure that your kid has no friends who aren’t travel sport friends which makes for a dull kid and locks them into that activity. It also ensures that the family builds their life around the kid and their activities which is oh so healthy. Oh and if you have another child they will have to: join the same sport (for efficiency sake), be dragged every weekend to their siblings activity or grow up with a family that is rarely together as a unit because of Larla’s travel team (especially if child #2 chooses a different path).

You don't need to do travel (abd all the money and time it requires) to still enjoy and be good at a sport.

DD, now 11, has been playing rec league soccer since Kindergarten. She likes the standard weekday practice + local Sat game b/c it allows ger to still do other things. And so do I (especially since we have subsequent kids in tow).

I don't get the hype around or the presumption that your kid will play travel-level sport just b/c he's registered to play a rec league in kindergarten.

Because that's what alot of parents will do whether their kids wants to or not. They wabt their kids to play sports no matter what. Also, rec sports end super early. It's like older kids are less deserving of fun.

In my area, rec soccer ends in third grade. Travel and year round only after that point, it’s ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's an issue at all to keep a 5 year old out of activities. My kids have never made lasting friendships from sports teams. They are friendly and play with others during the season, but we've never carried that relationship beyond the team. I don't think sports teams are good for making lasting friends in this area.

Regarding talent, you could sit out one year and be fine. But, yes, you will be behind other kids who play continuously. But, at that age, if he starts playing again next year, and he is truly somewhat talented, he'll pick it back up really easy. I think you have until about age 9 to try different sports before needing to stick with one if you intend to try and make high school teams.

This may be true for rec sports but once your kid does travel, you'll see how close they become with those friends. FWIW--my kid is on a competitive travel team in a sport they'd never tried till 3rd grade. Sports are good but sitting out K year is fine.

It will also ensure that your kid has no friends who aren’t travel sport friends which makes for a dull kid and locks them into that activity. It also ensures that the family builds their life around the kid and their activities which is oh so healthy. Oh and if you have another child they will have to: join the same sport (for efficiency sake), be dragged every weekend to their siblings activity or grow up with a family that is rarely together as a unit because of Larla’s travel team (especially if child #2 chooses a different path).

Not PP but this is absurd. My travel sport kid has friends from his neighborhood, school, church and yes, his sports team. He also plays in the orchestra and performs monthly community service. We still do all the family things - vacations, board game nights, pumpkin patches. And yes, he has siblings who also have their time consuming activities, none of which involve the same sport he does. It’s all good but yes, busy!

Then you are either early days or travel lite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's an issue at all to keep a 5 year old out of activities. My kids have never made lasting friendships from sports teams. They are friendly and play with others during the season, but we've never carried that relationship beyond the team. I don't think sports teams are good for making lasting friends in this area.

Regarding talent, you could sit out one year and be fine. But, yes, you will be behind other kids who play continuously. But, at that age, if he starts playing again next year, and he is truly somewhat talented, he'll pick it back up really easy. I think you have until about age 9 to try different sports before needing to stick with one if you intend to try and make high school teams.

This may be true for rec sports but once your kid does travel, you'll see how close they become with those friends. FWIW--my kid is on a competitive travel team in a sport they'd never tried till 3rd grade. Sports are good but sitting out K year is fine.

It will also ensure that your kid has no friends who aren’t travel sport friends which makes for a dull kid and locks them into that activity. It also ensures that the family builds their life around the kid and their activities which is oh so healthy. Oh and if you have another child they will have to: join the same sport (for efficiency sake), be dragged every weekend to their siblings activity or grow up with a family that is rarely together as a unit because of Larla’s travel team (especially if child #2 chooses a different path).

Not PP but this is absurd. My travel sport kid has friends from his neighborhood, school, church and yes, his sports team. He also plays in the orchestra and performs monthly community service. We still do all the family things - vacations, board game nights, pumpkin patches. And yes, he has siblings who also have their time consuming activities, none of which involve the same sport he does. It’s all good but yes, busy!

Then you are either early days or travel lite.

LOL no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's an issue at all to keep a 5 year old out of activities. My kids have never made lasting friendships from sports teams. They are friendly and play with others during the season, but we've never carried that relationship beyond the team. I don't think sports teams are good for making lasting friends in this area.

Regarding talent, you could sit out one year and be fine. But, yes, you will be behind other kids who play continuously. But, at that age, if he starts playing again next year, and he is truly somewhat talented, he'll pick it back up really easy. I think you have until about age 9 to try different sports before needing to stick with one if you intend to try and make high school teams.

This may be true for rec sports but once your kid does travel, you'll see how close they become with those friends. FWIW--my kid is on a competitive travel team in a sport they'd never tried till 3rd grade. Sports are good but sitting out K year is fine.

It will also ensure that your kid has no friends who aren’t travel sport friends which makes for a dull kid and locks them into that activity. It also ensures that the family builds their life around the kid and their activities which is oh so healthy. Oh and if you have another child they will have to: join the same sport (for efficiency sake), be dragged every weekend to their siblings activity or grow up with a family that is rarely together as a unit because of Larla’s travel team (especially if child #2 chooses a different path).

You don't need to do travel (abd all the money and time it requires) to still enjoy and be good at a sport.

DD, now 11, has been playing rec league soccer since Kindergarten. She likes the standard weekday practice + local Sat game b/c it allows ger to still do other things. And so do I (especially since we have subsequent kids in tow).

I don't get the hype around or the presumption that your kid will play travel-level sport just b/c he's registered to play a rec league in kindergarten.

Because that's what alot of parents will do whether their kids wants to or not. They wabt their kids to play sports no matter what. Also, rec sports end super early. It's like older kids are less deserving of fun.

In my area, rec soccer ends in third grade. Travel and year round only after that point, it’s ridiculous.

I'm pretty sure rec here goes through high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seems like you have a happy, healthy child.

+1

[Anonymous]

My rising second grader took tennis and then soccer each for a session in pre-K and it was challenging (nerves, freaking out with a substitute instructor etc). Then covid hit so he didn't do anything for a while, and frankly, wasn't interested. He loves running around outside, biking etc. and had anxiety around sports.

But, ever season I just asked if he wanted to try a sport. Last spring he said he wanted to try basketball. He was the worst on the team but it was very welcoming and he learned a lot. Right now we're discussing the fall. Possibly tennis, possibly flag football. He's trying a lot of stuff over the summer and swimming a ton.

I'm only doing 1 sport a season, and it has to be on the weekend. Weekdays are too busy and after a very structured day at school I want unstructured time for them. Also we're trying not to forget other less obvious sports like rock climbing, hiking, and fencing.

I don't believe in pressure at this age. My daughter started ballet at 4 because she really wanted to. I'm letting them try whatever they want (if the logistics work) and we'll see if something sticks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd join something to make sure you get to meet other families and he gets to know kids from school. Networks start to form in kindergarten and you don't want to be entirely left out. If you don't meet other families you'll be left off of birthday party invites and other social gatherings.

Scouts is a great way to get to know other kids and families. It tends to be 1-2 times a month and is very social.

Our rec soccer teams are also by elementary school and are another great way to make friends. My daughter doesn't even like soccer, but loves her rec team. It most of her friends in her grade and they are awful but have a fabulous time.

Another option in some communities is attending church.

He goes to school. That is his social network. It’s plenty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's an issue at all to keep a 5 year old out of activities. My kids have never made lasting friendships from sports teams. They are friendly and play with others during the season, but we've never carried that relationship beyond the team. I don't think sports teams are good for making lasting friends in this area.

Regarding talent, you could sit out one year and be fine. But, yes, you will be behind other kids who play continuously. But, at that age, if he starts playing again next year, and he is truly somewhat talented, he'll pick it back up really easy. I think you have until about age 9 to try different sports before needing to stick with one if you intend to try and make high school teams.

This may be true for rec sports but once your kid does travel, you'll see how close they become with those friends. FWIW--my kid is on a competitive travel team in a sport they'd never tried till 3rd grade. Sports are good but sitting out K year is fine.

Travel sports are way overrated. No thanks. Your kid isn’t going to be a star soccer player and now you wasted countless years worth of weekends “traveling” for a sport they would have been just as fulfilled playing on a red team causally