MIL vs. Me - Is it wrong to tell an 11yo and 7yo how much luxury items they desire cost?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think they’re too young, but I also lean toward thinking that talking about money is vulgar, so .. shrug. I’m probably closer in age to your MIL though too.

Talking about cost and budgeting with your family is not vulgar. Your notion is antiquated.

It’s such a weird notion, “vulgar”. How can one teach their children about good money management practices without talking about money?

Well you can’t, but I’m assuming the “vulgar” poster is a woman who went from her daddy paying bills to her rich husband paying bills. In that case the whole notion is strange to her.

[Anonymous]

I teach my kids how much things cost and to be grateful for what we have but I think probably what MIL is getting at and which I also agree with is that kids should not feel the financial insecurity of a household (if that exists). You don’t want your kids to feel guilty about asking for new shoes when theirs are worn out because they know you’re stressed about the grocery bill. But you do want them to understand what an extra pair of shoes that is being purchased just for fun costs and you want them to have gratitude for what they have and perspective for the way other people live.

I think that is the key differentiator. You want to be teaching them about fiscal responsibility to prepare them for the world without putting the burden of your own finances on their shoulders

[Anonymous]

Op- How were you raised? Did your parents talk to you about money?

My parents never let me “keep up with the Jones” growing up and I’m pretty grateful for it now. I’m intending to do the same w my dc though he’s too young so far- but differences between needs and wants etc. My parents have some real money and were dead set on me and my siblings not internalizing the wrong values. But I think it’s important bc as an adult there are going to be (a lot) of times you want things that are out of reach financially (hello, housing market) or that your friends have and you need the tools to process that.