If your kid was a top student and didn’t get into a top college

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:i interview for a reasonably competitive college. i was very impressed with and tried to write really nice recommendations for most of the students this year. most of my interviewees were either denied or waitlisted. there are a very large number of talented students applying nationally.

My kid got a rave review from a HYP interviewer, who told my kid what she was going to recommend my kid highly. She was really impressed with my kid, who did not get in.

I think my kid is a typical high-achieving kid, great grades, test scores, ordinary ECs, nothing really making my kid stand out from all the other exceptional kids. Being smart isn't good enough for HYP these days.

DC is going to a match, got accepted to 9 schools and rejected by three reaches. Surprised me a lot, but this year was tough for "ordinary" smart kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's simple math, 30,000 HS in the US, 20,000 ivy seats, so even if only the val's are considered there are still 1/3 rejected.

Add in all the sal's, athletes, and other types of applicants and you realize even as the top student at your HS, admission to a top 20 school is incredibly good fortune (assuming you want that).

There is no shame in a top student not getting admitted, no flaw in application, nothing other than bad luck of a sort (even though painful).

Top students who have been rejected are still top students, with much to be proud of, and as every study shows, highly likely to remain successful in life regardless of their alma mater!

My kid was very disappointed in not getting into HYPSM. I tried to foam the runways, but there was no way to prevent the profound disappointment. The kids from my kid's high school who got into HYPSM are all minorities with excellent stats, ECs. Sorry if that sounds racist, it's just a fact, like it or not. DC is going to a terrific school, not as elite as desired, but that's life. DC's older sibling went to a HYPSM college, and DC has even better grades, etc. than older DC. BUT older DC is 10 years older, and that decade really changed things in college admissions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s roughly 400 kids graduating from DCs school this year. The top kids have been in the same classes all 4 years and know each other’s ranking and test scores. The top 2% of graduating class (8 kids) all had 4.0 uw and 1500+ SATs. This is how acceptances went for them:

1. Carnegie Mellon (shut out of Ivies)
2. UMD (shut out of Ivies and top SLACs)
3. UMD (shut out of Ivies)
4. Johns Hopkins (recruited athlete)
5. Yale (first gen)
6. UMD
7. Penn (first gen)
8. Princeton (URM)

All great, hard working, top scores, excellent EC kids, but like PP said there just isn’t enough room for all high achievers at the tippy top.

I'm confused. This is a list of 8 top colleges. Well, 6 since once is there 3 times. So, every kid in the top 2% of your kid's high school got into a top school.

[Anonymous]

UMD is in the 98.9th %ile of colleges and universities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:i interview for a reasonably competitive college. i was very impressed with and tried to write really nice recommendations for most of the students this year. most of my interviewees were either denied or waitlisted. there are a very large number of talented students applying nationally.

My child had two interviews and did not get accepted. Why would they waste your time interviewing if the students didn’t stand a chance?

[Anonymous]

The reality is there are generally a dozen, if not many more top students at each school and the top universities are only going to offer spots to so many at each school. So, going to a highly competitive, top high school many not be an advantage in college admissions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's simple math, 30,000 HS in the US, 20,000 ivy seats, so even if only the val's are considered there are still 1/3 rejected.

Add in all the sal's, athletes, and other types of applicants and you realize even as the top student at your HS, admission to a top 20 school is incredibly good fortune (assuming you want that).

There is no shame in a top student not getting admitted, no flaw in application, nothing other than bad luck of a sort (even though painful).

Top students who have been rejected are still top students, with much to be proud of, and as every study shows, highly likely to remain successful in life regardless of their alma mater!

My kid was very disappointed in not getting into HYPSM. I tried to foam the runways, but there was no way to prevent the profound disappointment. The kids from my kid's high school who got into HYPSM are all minorities with excellent stats, ECs. Sorry if that sounds racist, it's just a fact, like it or not. DC is going to a terrific school, not as elite as desired, but that's life. DC's older sibling went to a HYPSM college, and DC has even better grades, etc. than older DC. BUT older DC is 10 years older, and that decade really changed things in college admissions.

Well, all the kids from my kid’s high school who got into HYPSM were white or Asian. Should I try to generalize from that experience?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's simple math, 30,000 HS in the US, 20,000 ivy seats, so even if only the val's are considered there are still 1/3 rejected.

Add in all the sal's, athletes, and other types of applicants and you realize even as the top student at your HS, admission to a top 20 school is incredibly good fortune (assuming you want that).

There is no shame in a top student not getting admitted, no flaw in application, nothing other than bad luck of a sort (even though painful).

Top students who have been rejected are still top students, with much to be proud of, and as every study shows, highly likely to remain successful in life regardless of their alma mater!

My kid was very disappointed in not getting into HYPSM. I tried to foam the runways, but there was no way to prevent the profound disappointment. The kids from my kid's high school who got into HYPSM are all minorities with excellent stats, ECs. Sorry if that sounds racist, it's just a fact, like it or not. DC is going to a terrific school, not as elite as desired, but that's life. DC's older sibling went to a HYPSM college, and DC has even better grades, etc. than older DC. BUT older DC is 10 years older, and that decade really changed things in college admissions.

You’re not sorry.

URM populations at these schools is at the high end around 20% and in some cases, closer to 15%. Making the claim that URMs are the ones taking your precious kid’s spot is just ludicrous. I’m sure you know this but made the claim anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s roughly 400 kids graduating from DCs school this year. The top kids have been in the same classes all 4 years and know each other’s ranking and test scores. The top 2% of graduating class (8 kids) all had 4.0 uw and 1500+ SATs. This is how acceptances went for them:

1. Carnegie Mellon (shut out of Ivies)
2. UMD (shut out of Ivies and top SLACs)
3. UMD (shut out of Ivies)
4. Johns Hopkins (recruited athlete)
5. Yale (first gen)
6. UMD
7. Penn (first gen)
8. Princeton (URM)

All great, hard working, top scores, excellent EC kids, but like PP said there just isn’t enough room for all high achievers at the tippy top.

I'm confused. This is a list of 8 top colleges. Well, 6 since once is there 3 times. So, every kid in the top 2% of your kid's high school got into a top school.

Agree. This list by PP is impressive and doesn’t really illustrate the point OP was trying to make.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's simple math, 30,000 HS in the US, 20,000 ivy seats, so even if only the val's are considered there are still 1/3 rejected.

Add in all the sal's, athletes, and other types of applicants and you realize even as the top student at your HS, admission to a top 20 school is incredibly good fortune (assuming you want that).

There is no shame in a top student not getting admitted, no flaw in application, nothing other than bad luck of a sort (even though painful).

Top students who have been rejected are still top students, with much to be proud of, and as every study shows, highly likely to remain successful in life regardless of their alma mater!

My kid was very disappointed in not getting into HYPSM. I tried to foam the runways, but there was no way to prevent the profound disappointment. The kids from my kid's high school who got into HYPSM are all minorities with excellent stats, ECs. Sorry if that sounds racist, it's just a fact, like it or not. DC is going to a terrific school, not as elite as desired, but that's life. DC's older sibling went to a HYPSM college, and DC has even better grades, etc. than older DC. BUT older DC is 10 years older, and that decade really changed things in college admissions.

What school did DC end up at?

S/he can do well there and go to a better grad school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's simple math, 30,000 HS in the US, 20,000 ivy seats, so even if only the val's are considered there are still 1/3 rejected.

Add in all the sal's, athletes, and other types of applicants and you realize even as the top student at your HS, admission to a top 20 school is incredibly good fortune (assuming you want that).

There is no shame in a top student not getting admitted, no flaw in application, nothing other than bad luck of a sort (even though painful).

Top students who have been rejected are still top students, with much to be proud of, and as every study shows, highly likely to remain successful in life regardless of their alma mater!

My kid was very disappointed in not getting into HYPSM. I tried to foam the runways, but there was no way to prevent the profound disappointment. The kids from my kid's high school who got into HYPSM are all minorities with excellent stats, ECs. Sorry if that sounds racist, it's just a fact, like it or not. DC is going to a terrific school, not as elite as desired, but that's life. DC's older sibling went to a HYPSM college, and DC has even better grades, etc. than older DC. BUT older DC is 10 years older, and that decade really changed things in college admissions.

Well, all the kids from my kid’s high school who got into HYPSM were white or Asian. Should I try to generalize from that experience?

Athletes were the most successful at getting into Ivys from my kid’s high school. As far as I know the other Ivy admits are Caucasian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s roughly 400 kids graduating from DCs school this year. The top kids have been in the same classes all 4 years and know each other’s ranking and test scores. The top 2% of graduating class (8 kids) all had 4.0 uw and 1500+ SATs. This is how acceptances went for them:

1. Carnegie Mellon (shut out of Ivies)
2. UMD (shut out of Ivies and top SLACs)
3. UMD (shut out of Ivies)
4. Johns Hopkins (recruited athlete)
5. Yale (first gen)
6. UMD
7. Penn (first gen)
8. Princeton (URM)

All great, hard working, top scores, excellent EC kids, but like PP said there just isn’t enough room for all high achievers at the tippy top.

Thank you for posting this.

Interesting enough my DD was in a similar position when she graduated - top 2% - 1550 - etc.

Was similarly shut out and elected to attend our State Flagship.

I remember move in day - she was in the honors cohort - and the other students were similarly academically credentialed.

My own observations regarding college admissions have been:

student athletes punch way above their weight. On the performance scale - academics vs athletics - ie both 99 percentile - the athlete has a much better shot at a top tier admit.

students from elite privates (Dalton, etc) - very strong placement.

Students whose parents are well placed in business and full pay - very strong placement.

I think there is a reality to admissions that we have to acknowledge.

If you are wealthy and/or influential your DC is going to have an advantage.

If you are full pay your DC will have an advantage.

I am ok with the above - but then perhaps colleges should not be not-for-profit and they should be paying their fair share in taxes on their RE holdings and endowments. If Harvard is the bastion of the ultra wealthy then it really shouldn't be non profit.

I will admit the upper tier rejections were hard on my DD and while my DD had very nice offers from the tier below it was hard to say no to the offer from our state flagship. It basically worked out that DD was paying for room and board. Not a bad deal these days.

And I tell her - sometimes it takes a little longer - but cream rises.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s roughly 400 kids graduating from DCs school this year. The top kids have been in the same classes all 4 years and know each other’s ranking and test scores. The top 2% of graduating class (8 kids) all had 4.0 uw and 1500+ SATs. This is how acceptances went for them:

1. Carnegie Mellon (shut out of Ivies)
2. UMD (shut out of Ivies and top SLACs)
3. UMD (shut out of Ivies)
4. Johns Hopkins (recruited athlete)
5. Yale (first gen)
6. UMD
7. Penn (first gen)
8. Princeton (URM)

All great, hard working, top scores, excellent EC kids, but like PP said there just isn’t enough room for all high achievers at the tippy top.

I'm confused. This is a list of 8 top colleges. Well, 6 since once is there 3 times. So, every kid in the top 2% of your kid's high school got into a top school.

Agree. This list by PP is impressive and doesn’t really illustrate the point OP was trying to make.

Disagree - 37.5% attended the state flagship. And while UMD may be a great school it is not elite academically/socially/etc. A Princeton/Yale/Penn grad will have doors opened for them that a UMD grad will never experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:UMD is in the 98.9th %ile of colleges and universities.

That may be so - but it is not socially elite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:UMD is in the 98.9th %ile of colleges and universities.

That may be so - but it is not socially elite.

Yikes