Being single and seeing my friends get married and have kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dog + independence is amazing. Getting sperm donor is always an option. When you feel the need dozens of men are available in hookup apps for quickie.

Feminism won, we’ve arrived ladies.

The average woman can’t afford to raise kids on her own.

Thats what child support is for. Go after the deadbeat.

How do you do that with an anonymous donor?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dog + independence is amazing. Getting sperm donor is always an option. When you feel the need dozens of men are available in hookup apps for quickie.

Feminism won, we’ve arrived ladies.

The average woman can’t afford to raise kids on her own.

Thats what child support is for. Go after the deadbeat.

How do you do that with an anonymous donor?

That’s not the only way to have children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dog + independence is amazing. Getting sperm donor is always an option. When you feel the need dozens of men are available in hookup apps for quickie.

Feminism won, we’ve arrived ladies.

The average woman can’t afford to raise kids on her own.

Thats what child support is for. Go after the deadbeat.

How do you do that with an anonymous donor?

That’s not the only way to have children.

So women should have children with a deadbeat (or any random sperm donor) on purpose and then put him on child support. Just for independence’s sake. Huh. That might be one of the dumbest things I’ve read on DCUM. You guys really, really hate men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. The grass is always greener.

This. Marriage and kids are great. But they also can come with crazy twists, turns, and tragedies. And then you’re deep in it with no easy solution. Grass is def always greener.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dog + independence is amazing. Getting sperm donor is always an option. When you feel the need dozens of men are available in hookup apps for quickie.

Feminism won, we’ve arrived ladies.

The average woman can’t afford to raise kids on her own.

Thats what child support is for. Go after the deadbeat.

How do you do that with an anonymous donor?

That’s not the only way to have children.

So women should have children with a deadbeat (or any random sperm donor) on purpose and then put him on child support. Just for independence’s sake. Huh. That might be one of the dumbest things I’ve read on DCUM. You guys really, really hate men.

I know two women who wanted to be single mothers, but not raise their children without resources, so they went on sites where married men seek affairs. They still pay child support but neither wants custody (I believe in both cases the man’s wife is in the dark to this day).

Not saying it’s “right” but it does happen. Which should be yet another cautionary tale for men not to cheat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dog + independence is amazing. Getting sperm donor is always an option. When you feel the need dozens of men are available in hookup apps for quickie.

Feminism won, we’ve arrived ladies.

The average woman can’t afford to raise kids on her own.

Thats what child support is for. Go after the deadbeat.

How do you do that with an anonymous donor?

That’s not the only way to have children.

So women should have children with a deadbeat (or any random sperm donor) on purpose and then put him on child support. Just for independence’s sake. Huh. That might be one of the dumbest things I’ve read on DCUM. You guys really, really hate men.

I know two women who wanted to be single mothers, but not raise their children without resources, so they went on sites where married men seek affairs. They still pay child support but neither wants custody (I believe in both cases the man’s wife is in the dark to this day).

Not saying it’s “right” but it does happen. Which should be yet another cautionary tale for men not to cheat.

I doubt this is true. Any woman that would do this is so conniving that I doubt you have personally come across two such psychopaths.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dog + independence is amazing. Getting sperm donor is always an option. When you feel the need dozens of men are available in hookup apps for quickie.

Feminism won, we’ve arrived ladies.

The average woman can’t afford to raise kids on her own.

Thats what child support is for. Go after the deadbeat.

How do you do that with an anonymous donor?

That’s not the only way to have children.

So women should have children with a deadbeat (or any random sperm donor) on purpose and then put him on child support. Just for independence’s sake. Huh. That might be one of the dumbest things I’ve read on DCUM. You guys really, really hate men.

I know two women who wanted to be single mothers, but not raise their children without resources, so they went on sites where married men seek affairs. They still pay child support but neither wants custody (I believe in both cases the man’s wife is in the dark to this day).

Not saying it’s “right” but it does happen. Which should be yet another cautionary tale for men not to cheat.

I doubt this is true. Any woman that would do this is so conniving that I doubt you have personally come across two such psychopaths.

Why would it be any worse or more conniving than the man having an affair?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do other ladies here who are single get sad because they see their friends getting married and having kids? I know it sounds lame but I get depressed and sad because I can’t find anyone. Mid 30s and single and each guy I meet, they are either talking to multiple women, divorced with kids, or either jobless or have a blue-collar job…not that I have anything against that, but I’m looking for a family soon.

What do you do to cope and meet guys? I try to go to yoga classes, bookstores like Barnes and noble, I’m even trying kickball leagues this spring.

You sound like a classic case of you need to relax your standards. Honestly, the only deal-breaker on that list of yours is "talking to multiple women." And even THAT is to be expected -- even acceptable -- when you're just getting to know each other.

I mean, read what you wrote again. You say you don't "have anything against" men with blue-collar jobs, "but" you're "looking for a family soon." So, what, a blue-collar worker can't be a family man?

And, I hate to break it to you, sister, but you're in your mid-30s now. The dating pool is absolutely 100% going to contain divorced men. Why is this a problem for you? Damaged goods?

You're looking for a unicorn. Your frustration with being single is an unforced error. Let go of the myth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do other ladies here who are single get sad because they see their friends getting married and having kids? I know it sounds lame but I get depressed and sad because I can’t find anyone. Mid 30s and single and each guy I meet, they are either talking to multiple women, divorced with kids, or either jobless or have a blue-collar job…not that I have anything against that, but I’m looking for a family soon.

What do you do to cope and meet guys? I try to go to yoga classes, bookstores like Barnes and noble, I’m even trying kickball leagues this spring.

I get depressed and sad when I see beautiful, thin, young women who are still full of life and vitality and have the freedom to do whatever they want and still think life will be full of joy. Then I go home to an H that would rather watch basketball than talk to me, a kid that tells me I'm the worst mom ever because I won't make chicken nuggets, and a 2 month old that shrieks like a banshee every time I set her down to take a dump so I just hold it in for days because it's easier. As I finally get a chance to sit on the toilet and push out 3 days' worth a crap from a butthole that is still healing from tearing during childbirth, I look in the mirror and just see the shell of the woman I used to be, beaten down by life, bags under my eyes and lines on my face, shackled to a family that probably wouldn't even notice if I died because they're too busy on their screens, until the pantry held nothing but crumbs and an inch thick layer of filth covered everything, and then they'd finally look up from their devices and wonder....what happened to the magic that used to do all of this for us?

How raw.

[Anonymous]

i would not full stop rule out divorced men with kid(s). some of them might be toxic and some might not want more kids. you do not need to relax your standards but you do need to throw out the checklist (superficial and material qualities like a certain job or income etc. are ultimately the wrong ones).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do other ladies here who are single get sad because they see their friends getting married and having kids? I know it sounds lame but I get depressed and sad because I can’t find anyone. Mid 30s and single and each guy I meet, they are either talking to multiple women, divorced with kids, or either jobless or have a blue-collar job…not that I have anything against that, but I’m looking for a family soon.

What do you do to cope and meet guys? I try to go to yoga classes, bookstores like Barnes and noble, I’m even trying kickball leagues this spring.

I get depressed and sad when I see beautiful, thin, young women who are still full of life and vitality and have the freedom to do whatever they want and still think life will be full of joy. Then I go home to an H that would rather watch basketball than talk to me, a kid that tells me I'm the worst mom ever because I won't make chicken nuggets, and a 2 month old that shrieks like a banshee every time I set her down to take a dump so I just hold it in for days because it's easier. As I finally get a chance to sit on the toilet and push out 3 days' worth a crap from a butthole that is still healing from tearing during childbirth, I look in the mirror and just see the shell of the woman I used to be, beaten down by life, bags under my eyes and lines on my face, shackled to a family that probably wouldn't even notice if I died because they're too busy on their screens, until the pantry held nothing but crumbs and an inch thick layer of filth covered everything, and then they'd finally look up from their devices and wonder....what happened to the magic that used to do all of this for us?

How raw.

Oh lord. PP needs to pull it together. Really cannot find 10 minutes to use the bathroom? The baby presumably sleeps for at least a couple hours in a row. If your kid talks to you like that, put an immediate stop to it. Don't be a wimp about it. Obviously, harder to know what to do about the marriage, but steps need to be taken. It's hard having an infant and being sleep deprived, but this isn't "raw" anything other than raw sadsackery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dog + independence is amazing. Getting sperm donor is always an option. When you feel the need dozens of men are available in hookup apps for quickie.

Feminism won, we’ve arrived ladies.

The average woman can’t afford to raise kids on her own.

Thats what child support is for. Go after the deadbeat.

How do you do that with an anonymous donor?

That’s not the only way to have children.

So women should have children with a deadbeat (or any random sperm donor) on purpose and then put him on child support. Just for independence’s sake. Huh. That might be one of the dumbest things I’ve read on DCUM. You guys really, really hate men.

I know two women who wanted to be single mothers, but not raise their children without resources, so they went on sites where married men seek affairs. They still pay child support but neither wants custody (I believe in both cases the man’s wife is in the dark to this day).

Not saying it’s “right” but it does happen. Which should be yet another cautionary tale for men not to cheat.

Oh yeah the wives will never suspect the thousands a month missing from their husbands paycheck to pay for child support.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dog + independence is amazing. Getting sperm donor is always an option. When you feel the need dozens of men are available in hookup apps for quickie.

Feminism won, we’ve arrived ladies.

The average woman can’t afford to raise kids on her own.

Thats what child support is for. Go after the deadbeat.

How do you do that with an anonymous donor?

That’s not the only way to have children.

So women should have children with a deadbeat (or any random sperm donor) on purpose and then put him on child support. Just for independence’s sake. Huh. That might be one of the dumbest things I’ve read on DCUM. You guys really, really hate men.

I know two women who wanted to be single mothers, but not raise their children without resources, so they went on sites where married men seek affairs. They still pay child support but neither wants custody (I believe in both cases the man’s wife is in the dark to this day).

Not saying it’s “right” but it does happen. Which should be yet another cautionary tale for men not to cheat.

Oh yeah the wives will never suspect the thousands a month missing from their husbands paycheck to pay for child support.

In an adequate wealthy family? $36,000 or so a year could easily be disguised in investment accounts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do other ladies here who are single get sad because they see their friends getting married and having kids? I know it sounds lame but I get depressed and sad because I can’t find anyone. Mid 30s and single and each guy I meet, they are either talking to multiple women, divorced with kids, or either jobless or have a blue-collar job…not that I have anything against that, but I’m looking for a family soon.

What do you do to cope and meet guys? I try to go to yoga classes, bookstores like Barnes and noble, I’m even trying kickball leagues this spring.

You sound like a classic case of you need to relax your standards. Honestly, the only deal-breaker on that list of yours is "talking to multiple women." And even THAT is to be expected -- even acceptable -- when you're just getting to know each other.

I mean, read what you wrote again. You say you don't "have anything against" men with blue-collar jobs, "but" you're "looking for a family soon." So, what, a blue-collar worker can't be a family man?

And, I hate to break it to you, sister, but you're in your mid-30s now. The dating pool is absolutely 100% going to contain divorced men. Why is this a problem for you? Damaged goods?

You're looking for a unicorn. Your frustration with being single is an unforced error. Let go of the myth.

This post is toxic. It’s the person who, if you post in five years that you are worried about lost income while on bed rest/unhappy you can’t afford to live in a good school district/stressed over the cost of a Disney vacation will snarkily tell you to make more money and didn’t your husband earn a low income when you met him???

This is the person who, is you post about drama with an ex, will ask you didn’t you know he was divorced when you married him??

Your standards are not unreasonable, and none of your deal breakers are out of line. People here just hate to see women know their worth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dog + independence is amazing. Getting sperm donor is always an option. When you feel the need dozens of men are available in hookup apps for quickie.

Feminism won, we’ve arrived ladies.

The average woman can’t afford to raise kids on her own.

Thats what child support is for. Go after the deadbeat.

How do you do that with an anonymous donor?

That’s not the only way to have children.

So women should have children with a deadbeat (or any random sperm donor) on purpose and then put him on child support. Just for independence’s sake. Huh. That might be one of the dumbest things I’ve read on DCUM. You guys really, really hate men.

I know two women who wanted to be single mothers, but not raise their children without resources, so they went on sites where married men seek affairs. They still pay child support but neither wants custody (I believe in both cases the man’s wife is in the dark to this day).

Not saying it’s “right” but it does happen. Which should be yet another cautionary tale for men not to cheat.

Oh yeah the wives will never suspect the thousands a month missing from their husbands paycheck to pay for child support.

In an adequate wealthy family? $36,000 or so a year could easily be disguised in investment accounts.

Doesn’t child support scale linearly with income? So it will always be a significant factor. I recall a friend making 750-1M a year owing 60k a year in child support. Kinda difficult to hide.