Should I tell my DD to not be pre-med?
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Anonymous
OP, we have a written contact with our kid. What we do. What our expectations are of him. It’s a lot more nuanced than “get 3.0 and don’t get into trouble”. He needs to be on a path where he leaves college more employable than he entered. He needs to articulate his current realistic post-college plan (which can change, and in fact has changed). He needs to be taking steps to get there. Etc. We will revisit mid year if necessary. In our house, we’d sit down and re-visit. We’d tell him the grades concern us for med school admission and discuss alternate paths. We’d also discuss supports available to improve grades. And we’d require our kid meet with the president-med advisor at the college who has almost certainly seen this a dozen times this year alone. Two things: First sophomore year isn’t too late to change courses in many cases. Lots of kids start college as MDs and change their mind. Also, ADHD girls compensate well— until they can’t. A high achieving woman with accelerating demands who suddenly drops all the balls she’s juggling is a pattern common in ADHD— and very treatable. So, consider whether that could be an issue. |
Anonymous
Wow. |
Anonymous
+1 I mean seriously, what a way to destroy your kid. |
Anonymous
+2. You’re a horrible parent, OP. The truth is out. No wonder your poor daughter is suffering. |
Anonymous
+3 stay out of this op. You are awful and your kid will do better navigating it without you. |
Anonymous
OP here. How am I the "bad" one here. $70,000 is a lot for a degree in public health if all she decides she wants to work in health policy or epidemiology. We know there is no money there. I just want my DD to have a well-paying, stable job and if she goes all "social justice warrior" on me, what we're paying for Hopkins won't be worth it. I have supported her every step of the way, but I know my DD is in that stage where she believes she can "change the world" and that's not real life. |
Anonymous
OP no need to defend you parenting to strangers. They are not in your shoes. I'd focus on getting your DD back on track. |
Anonymous
College is enough of a pressure cooker without the added pressure of your parent threatening to upend your entire life if you don't fit in a narrow category of what you think they should do. Smashing a square peg into a round hole isn't going to result in a lucrative career for her. And it certainly will destroy your relationship, if not your daughter. |
Anonymous
| Threatening that a sophomore will need to transfer as a a junior is awful OP. She is already established there, successfully got in, has friends etc. you’d really stop paying simply because she may not be able to stay on the pre med path?? |
Anonymous
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Doctor here.
I sometimes wish I had tanked orgo. Then I wouldn’t be stuck working 60 hours a week and dealing with insane administrators who just urge us to “work smarter” so that we can see more patients and the admin can get a raise. I am so burned out. And I don’t see it getting any better nor do I see a way out: There are many paths to happiness. Medicine is a mess right now. |
Anonymous
| She might supplement and get into Med School later on as an older student but she's not getting in right out of college, not with those grades. |
Anonymous
I appreciate you saying this. Really. |
Anonymous
| Damn OP you a helicopter psycho |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| Transfer to UMD from Hopkins. Let her do public policy. It is insane to pay $70K per year for Hopkins for public policy. |