Parenting on the Weekends (Young Kids)
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Anonymous
| I take time to exercise Saturday and Sundays but it's pretty go-go-go the rest of the time. My husband is a 100% participant. He spends a lot of time catching up on the things that need to be done around the house (fixing things etc.) and I do more outings with the kids. He's an extrovert and his job is stressful so for his mental health a couple hours alone is important, but he ends up doing chores most of the time (even though I tell him to relax!). I do better with the kids out of the house so I plan an outing somewhere for a couple of hours. They do an hour of quiet time, during which time I work or do chores. We do grocery pickup now, which helps. But we also enjoy cooking and make big batches of stuff for the week so we spend more time on that than people that just do 30 min meals. So....not a lot of downtime, unfortunately. Oh, kids are 4 and 6. |
Anonymous
Well, naturally. And the poor had nothing but work, and rarely interacted with their kids! |
Anonymous
| Zero. I’m a single mom (by choice). |
Anonymous
| I’m there with you OP, 15 mo and almost 5 yo. We are beat by Sunday night. I don’t know that either of us have an expectation of a certain amount of time to ourselves but we do take advantage of the grandparents who are nearby probably every other weekend. Otherwise the only break is during nap time for the baby and we’ll usually have our older one so quiet time during that period (either quiet play time by herself or a movie or reading to herself). I find that the weekends where we have something planned that gets us out of the house for part of the day seems to be easier than when we have nothing planned and then the kids are stuck at home. This is a hard age and Monday mornings when I drop them off at daycare are glorious too, as much as I enjoy my kids, they are exhausting at this age. |
Anonymous
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I would hire a sitter if you can, use movies without guilt during naptime, and also look into kid art classes or soccer lessons (things you have regularly scheduled on weekend mornings where you take the kid but can get some alone/errand time while the kid is in the class).
Your kids are at tough ages. They won't always be so wild and injury-prone. |
Anonymous
This happens for a while. You are in the thick of it. I used to love Mondays when I could go back to work. Now my twins are 7 so the weekends are much more relaxing (sometimes - now they have more activities, which can also be exhausting). One thing I'll say is that your 4 year old could/should go to bed earlier. My 7 year olds go to sleep an hour earlier than that and also wake up around 6:30/7. Those night time hours are my time (or our time, sometimes my husband and I spend them together, sometimes we spend them apart). |
Anonymous
I regularly think about putting my 4 year old to bed earlier, but he already is waking up at 6:30 most days and waiting patiently in his room until the ok to wake clock tells him he can go play at 7:00. He's getting to the age where he could probably go read quietly in his room starting at 7:45/8 and then do lights out at 8:30. In one sense, I do miss the days of having one child who went to bed at 7:00 pm. That extra hour and a half at night makes a WORLD of difference. |
Anonymous
Spending time with your children is what good parents do. You owe them you time. |
Anonymous
You know that sleep begets sleep, right? The later my kids go to bed, the earlier they seem to wake up. Try putting him to bed 15 minutes early every other night and by the end of the week you'll be back an hour. I bet he won't be waking up any earlier. He's four! |
Anonymous
GTFO with that mommy martyr BS. Women can't win. Of course Op spends time with her kids, she spends a LOT of time with them. But she's also a human who's allowed to have downtime to relax and recharge and pursue her own hobbies. You can't pour from an empty cup. What she OWES HER KIDS is a healthy mother. |
Anonymous
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I specifically remember thinking/saying "I need a weekend nanny," but we didn't really want to pay for that at the time. Kid was in day care during the weekdays. As I recall, other moms in my mom group did NOT understand. They were like, "Weekends are our special time together!"
I spent lots of time trying to figure out why things were harder for me. I think it was combo of 1) DH didn't do enough 2) Kid was especially active 3) I had undiagnosed ADHD. Really, it would have been better if I had hired weekend help. I could have done so, but it felt extravagant and I was too busy finding fault with myself. I really could have used a break. |
Anonymous
| This is why I hate being a SAHM. It's this, every day, until some magic day they go to school allegedly. |
Anonymous
| None during their waking hours |
Anonymous
| I think you are wound too tight. You should have areas in your home where your kids can safe6 play independently. Even at 1 years old. Baby proof. |
Anonymous
| 16 months and 3.5 year old - almost no time to myself and my husband and I try to do a fair amount of divide and conquer. Getting out of the house and going on outings helps a lot. We are always physically exhausted when we get back from day trips, but at least we've had a change of scenery, probably seen something new so psychologically that helps. Thank you to the parents with older kids who say it gets better! Kids' activities (classes, sports) are starting up in our area so I am excited to take the 3.5 year old to lessons, even if they are short and/or I have to be physically present. |