Why is separation/divorce so awful? I am a wreck and don't know where to turn...

[Anonymous]

We have been talking divorce for 4 years and I don't regret the decision. But it is just churning me up inside to see him moving on to a serious relationship in just 2 months, and she's much younger and prettier, of course, than me. My teen son is with him half the time and my husband makes far more money than I ever could, so my son wants to be at his dad's house. How do people get through this? I'm nauseous, teary, distracted and not taking care of myself, I just can't bear it.

[Anonymous]

First of all, you are seeing a rebound relationship; I don't know the statistics but I don't think odds are on it working out long term. But never mind that, why are you even giving a moments thought to him and his way of coping. You're lucky you have no regrets. Now put that resolve to work and realize how great that the agony of staying in a relationship that made you both unhappy is over. You are a goddess in your own way. You need to find the true sources of your happiness. Maybe it is making others' lives better in some way.

[Anonymous]

Also, let your son cope in his own way and support it. He will always be our son.

[Anonymous]

Your son (!)

[Anonymous]

I am right there with you. A complete wreck.

[Anonymous]

Should have pleased your husband better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Should have pleased your husband better.

You are not helping asshole.

[Anonymous]

Just be glad he's not a pos deadbeat and your kid will never want for anything. As for the dating ? Remember why you are divorcing and smile because his new squeeze gets that too.

[Anonymous]

Someone just told me about this: http://www.newbeginningsusa.org/

Maybe a support group is the way to go. Looks kind of interesting.

Ive heard over and over that men almost always move on FAST and with a younger woman. It seems being on their own is harder for them. Your son will figure out what is going on eventually. Im so sorry. Im just new to separation too and its surreal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Should have pleased your husband better.

You are not helping asshole.

I disagee. Though not the best articulation this poster Makes a fair point.

[Anonymous]

Men most always move onto pretty and younger and thinner women. They have a second chance And they have the opportunity.

[Anonymous]

It is not equal or fair. Men get divorced and upgrade. Most women get divorced and are alone.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry. It must be tough. I know a couple where the wife initiated the divorce, moved in with a new guy, and it fizzled pretty quickly. The husband was the one who wanted to work things out. He ultimately met a younger woman and happily remarried. More money, nicer house.

[Anonymous]

No advice, but if you were my real life friend, I'd take you out for girl time. Best to you. It will get better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is not equal or fair. Men get divorced and upgrade. Most women get divorced and are alone.

Women are often too quick to initiate divorces (and they initiate the majority of them). The grass is always greener.