My 15 year old admitted to trying pot

[Anonymous]

I picked him up from school, he seemed weird. I told him I was taking him for his bloodwork, he had a physical the day before. This was just a regular blood test. He flipped and refused to have the blood test. I then got suspicious. He totally denied it.

His friend at school smokes pot at school often. My son is open with me about this. My son always said it was dumb. Fast forward to today, he admitted to his brother that he tried pot once AT school. His brother told us. Son totally denied it for hours. He said he lied to his brother about it just to see his reaction. Then later he admitted it to his brother again and we heard. He still denied it to us until hours later.

I am livid about his lying and the drug use.
FWIW, he said he wanted to see what it was like and he didn't like it.
Son has adhd. I am so disappointed.

I may refuse to let him leave the school for breaks. He needs written permission to leave.
What should the punishment be?

[Anonymous]

OP here. I am also thinking of drug testing at home.

[Anonymous]

Do not allow him to leave school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do not allow him to leave school.

I signed a form at the start of the year allowing him to leave, he says everyone leaves.
He says he will never try it again.
Should I take this privilege away?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do not allow him to leave school.

I signed a form at the start of the year allowing him to leave, he says everyone leaves.
He says he will never try it again.
Should I take this privilege away?

"Everyone's doing it" is the oldest line in the book. Tell him you're going to see for yourself. He'll quickly back off from that lie.

Yes, withdraw your permission. There should be no reason for him to go out.

How well do you know his friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do not allow him to leave school.

I signed a form at the start of the year allowing him to leave, he says everyone leaves.
He says he will never try it again.
Should I take this privilege away?

"Everyone's doing it" is the oldest line in the book. Tell him you're going to see for yourself. He'll quickly back off from that lie.

Yes, withdraw your permission. There should be no reason for him to go out.

How well do you know his friends?

Are you the PP?

He also tried smoking once. I have met this one fried a few times. They don't hang out off of school property.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do not allow him to leave school.

I signed a form at the start of the year allowing him to leave, he says everyone leaves.
He says he will never try it again.
Should I take this privilege away?

"Everyone's doing it" is the oldest line in the book. Tell him you're going to see for yourself. He'll quickly back off from that lie.

Yes, withdraw your permission. There should be no reason for him to go out.

How well do you know his friends?

Are you the PP?

He also tried smoking once. I have met this one fried a few times. They don't hang out off of school property.

Yes, I am 19:22. BTDT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do not allow him to leave school.

I signed a form at the start of the year allowing him to leave, he says everyone leaves.
He says he will never try it again.
Should I take this privilege away?

I would immediately rescind that privilege. I would tell him that he had shown I couldn't trust him to use good judgement when unsupervised, based on the drug use and all of the lying, so he would lose the leaving school on breaks privilege indefinitely. That certainly seems logical given what happened here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do not allow him to leave school.

I signed a form at the start of the year allowing him to leave, he says everyone leaves.
He says he will never try it again.
Should I take this privilege away?

I would immediately rescind that privilege. I would tell him that he had shown I couldn't trust him to use good judgement when unsupervised, based on the drug use and all of the lying, so he would lose the leaving school on breaks privilege indefinitely. That certainly seems logical given what happened here.

19:22 here. I agree with the above.

[Anonymous]

I once read an article or blog about this kid and ever since I've vowed that if my kid ever confessed to drug use to take very aggressive steps immediately. I'm sure there are true experimenter but seems like it could spiral out of control.

http://henrysfundonline.org/henrys-story/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I once read an article or blog about this kid and ever since I've vowed that if my kid ever confessed to drug use to take very aggressive steps immediately. I'm sure there are true experimenter but seems like it could spiral out of control.

http://henrysfundonline.org/henrys-story/

So what do you suggest?

[Anonymous]

You're overreacting. He's just going to want to do it more.

[Anonymous]

Good for him!! It's the future.

[Anonymous]

I would let this be a warning that if it ever happens again you will rescind the off-campus privileges. I believe in second chances and believe that kids should know consequences in advance. That way they make informed decisions. I would also speak with him about ADHD and the correlation between impulsivity and addiction of any kind and that he is basically at risk so he has to be extra careful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would let this be a warning that if it ever happens again you will rescind the off-campus privileges. I believe in second chances and believe that kids should know consequences in advance. That way they make informed decisions. I would also speak with him about ADHD and the correlation between impulsivity and addiction of any kind and that he is basically at risk so he has to be extra careful.

I haven't come across this literature. Do you have a link I can show him?