My 15 year old admitted to trying pot

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're overreacting. He's just going to want to do it more.

+1

[Anonymous]

Op here. I am so depressed.

[Anonymous]

OP no reason to be depressed. This is not the end of the world. I wouldn't tell him about the ADD correlation to scare him, but more to explain why you are worried. If you get beneath your anger, you'll see what's really behind it is worry. If you convey that in a caring way, it may be more effective than harsh punishment. That may just alienate him. I've always knows of a connection btwn impulsivity and addiction (drugs, gambling, etc.--but this doesn't happen to everybody so don't worry!) so I don't have a specific article in mind but I just googled impulsivity addiction and got this list--go through it and find something straightforward and appropriate to share: https://www.google.com/search?q=impulsivity+addiction&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8 The UCLA page is interesting. I would also discuss with him what he thinks the consequences of getting caught doing that at school would be. I would worry about the school's response if he got caught smoking pot at school. Pot is not as much a drug of addiction as other drugs, as I understand it, but you could share a concern about pot being a gateway to drugs that are addicting and his potential vulnerability due to impulsivity. I've explained to my impulsive 13 y.o. that he will have to be more careful than the average person if he ever experiments with drugs or drinks alcohol (at any age) because of these risks.

[Anonymous]

Depressed? Why would you be depressed, OP?

Your kid did something lots of kids do. He tried pot. He didn't even like it. Sounds pretty normal to me.

That said, the mistake he made is that he tried it at school. My nephew was caught with a joint in his pocket his senior year on school grounds and was expelled, which caused his college to rescind his acceptance and delay his college plans by a year. He absolutely deserved his expulsion, especially since he knew the school's zero tolerance policy.

Of course, he survived and is now a senior in college and is not a pothead living in my sister's basement.

Rescind the privilege of leaving campus as a consequence of his poor judgment and move on. Don't worry so much about the experimentation. Kids do that. They drink, they smoke, and they do stupid things. That's what kids do. He'll be fine.

[Anonymous]

I'd give him a choice between rescinding his off campus permission or weekly drug tests. If the latter, do it every week on the same day. Marijuana can take two weeks to clear the system, so it should be positive early on. Buy tests off the internet--much cheaper than CVS. Sometimes kids need an excuse not to do pot with friends. My parents drug test me is an excellent one.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, but I am still having trouble with the whole "leaving campus" thing. What school allows this? Why would parents want their kids leaving school grounds, especially when they aren't old enough to drive themselves to appointments, or whatever reason it is that they have?
Nothing good comes from leaving campus. They're doing drugs.

[Anonymous]

I am a male with adhd adult. Smoked a lot of weed beginning in HS but survived, graduated went to college, smoked more there and now many years later have 3 kids and wife and job. Quit in early 20's.

It's not necessarily end of world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd give him a choice between rescinding his off campus permission or weekly drug tests. If the latter, do it every week on the same day. Marijuana can take two weeks to clear the system, so it should be positive early on. Buy tests off the internet--much cheaper than CVS. Sometimes kids need an excuse not to do pot with friends. My parents drug test me is an excellent one.

Any recommendations for a brand of drug tests?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry, but I am still having trouble with the whole "leaving campus" thing. What school allows this? Why would parents want their kids leaving school grounds, especially when they aren't old enough to drive themselves to appointments, or whatever reason it is that they have?
Nothing good comes from leaving campus. They're doing drugs.

Kids leave campus because this is a small school and there is no on site cafeteria.

I went to a catholic high school, everyone left for lunch. Heck, even kids in grade eight leave for lunch.

[Anonymous]

OP here, he now told me that when he tried pot, it was right after he did bad on his math test. So, i guess that's how he dealt with a bad math test.

This worries me more......

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, he now told me that when he tried pot, it was right after he did bad on his math test. So, i guess that's how he dealt with a bad math test.

This worries me more......

If he takes meds for ADHD? Smoking pot with those meds is a disaster.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd give him a choice between rescinding his off campus permission or weekly drug tests. If the latter, do it every week on the same day. Marijuana can take two weeks to clear the system, so it should be positive early on. Buy tests off the internet--much cheaper than CVS. Sometimes kids need an excuse not to do pot with friends. My parents drug test me is an excellent one.

Any recommendations for a brand of drug tests?

iCup--multiple sources on the internet.

[Anonymous]

I'd be more worried about the lying.

Take away the off campus privilege.

Explain to your son he is already working at a deficit with ADHD and he is playing with fire. He can mess any more with his brain.

http://time.com/61940/recreational-pot-use-harmful-to-young-peoples-brains/

I would have an extra punishment for lying. Take away his phone and tv for a week. Make him clean a toilet or 2.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, he now told me that when he tried pot, it was right after he did bad on his math test. So, i guess that's how he dealt with a bad math test.

This worries me more......

If he takes meds for ADHD? Smoking pot with those meds is a disaster.

He refuses to take meds, he says he doesn't want to mess with his brain. Yes, seriously.
I think he needs them.


And to the PP, yes the lying is what has upset me the most.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, he now told me that when he tried pot, it was right after he did bad on his math test. So, i guess that's how he dealt with a bad math test.

This worries me more......

If he takes meds for ADHD? Smoking pot with those meds is a disaster.

He refuses to take meds, he says he doesn't want to mess with his brain. Yes, seriously.
I think he needs them.


And to the PP, yes the lying is what has upset me the most.

You need to chill. If I were your son, I would experiment too. Stop watching him like a hawk. He probably feels like a criminal. He smoked pot for getting a bad grade and more than likely because he was deathly afraid of disappointing you. Poor kid.