Law school hook up culture?
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
|
Any relatively recent law school grads (like within the last 10 years or so) on this board? If so, do you also notice how casual "dating" has become the norm in law schools? I am a 1L and, while I was very aware of the hook up lifestyle in college, I had hoped law school would be different. But people are so stressed and busy and have such tight schedules that they don't seem to prioritize relationships. Onle a few people have become actual boyfriend/girlfriend in my 1L class and I know for a fact that one couple is cheating on each other. The upperclassmen at my law school seem to participate in this hook up scene too, and I can think of very few relationships - maybe 3 off the top of my head.
I have a friend at UVA and he says the same thing. Is this common? |
Anonymous
| This is everywhere. |
Anonymous
| Yes, very common, unfortunately. There are some exceptions. I know several serious couples who got together in law school, and this was recently. |
Anonymous
|
Law students are a pathetic sub-species unfortunately (I was one once) and thus it's predictable that catch-as-catch-can may rule at various points.
Some couples have lasted but that's the exception IMO. |
Anonymous
|
OP here. I'm just a little sad because it looks like all the men I like don't actually want to date me (just sleep with me) and because they have so many casual sex options because the other women seem to want casual sex, I don't get a chance at a relationship.
|
Anonymous
This is a collective action problem. Women need to stop having sex with men who don't want relationships. Except for the small percentage of women who want no strings attached se , most women hook up with guys in higher hopes the guy will decide he wants a relationship. Women should instead only hook up with men who treat them as if they are dating, which means a prearranged one on one outing like dinner, a movie, etc. wait until you are in a relationship before having sex with the guy. Do not have sex with a guy in the hopes that the hook up will turn into a relationship. Millennial women and younger need to stop putting up with this bs! |
Anonymous
+1 Especially to bolded. |
Anonymous
You need to read hookingupsmart by susan walsh. Let me guess, you are chasing the top 20% of men, and you are not a top 20% woman on the smv distribution. However, men at your level that would love to date you respectfully - well these men are ones you don't want. Do not blame men - you have to assess the market place and game plan accordingly. This is what happens to most women like you. In your teens and 20's you will chase and fuck alphas, but most won't put a ring on it because they know that 8's,9's, and 10's are their level and they WILL marry those girls. at 28+, you'll start to date and end up with someone closer, equal, or slightly below your SMV. That guy you end up with long term is the same dude you have ZERO interest in right now. |
Anonymous
Major major assumption here. Law school is no different from college kids who are just looking to have fun and explore. So in my experience, many girls equally want NSA sex making it the majority of women as well. |
Anonymous
It isn't a collective action problem though. The high end of the female dating pool doesn't care if 5's, 6's, and 7's are giving it up easier because they'll still have guys at their SMV level at their beck and call. The 5's, 6's, and 7's have to use sex to snag higher value women because they know they can' compete with higher value women otherwise. The reason they have sex with a guy in the hopes of it turning into a relationship is because they instinctively know without it they have a tough time competing for the same men higher value women compete for. If you look at the data, while men are ageist in who they find attractive (men as a whole find peak women attractiveness is at 22), women have zero sense of distribution. What I mean by this is for any given age slice, women think 80% of the guys are 'below average' in attractiveness. So it is completely understanable why 5's, 6's, and 7's give it up to top 20% guys easily. In fact given that that segment of women are out chasing a smaller slice of men, 5's/6's/7's who are less promiscuous should actually have their pick of the litter WITHIN the male population of similar value as not every 5,6,7 girl is chasing men of equal value. http://www.hookingupsmart.com/ http://www.hookingupsmart.com/2013/02/12/hookinguprealities/the-most-attractive-women-have-the-least-casual-sex/ "the most attractive women have the least casual sex" |
Anonymous
| The idea of the market value of women makes me want to upchuck. Revolting and a crick if sh-t. |
Anonymous
it isn't a woman only concept. men have a market value too. market value doesn't literally mean dollars and cents. it is a place holder of how competitive you are in the dating pool in relation to others. If you don't think competition exists in the dating pool, you are deluding yourself. It is better to get smart and educated so you can optimize your mating strategy over being naive. |
Anonymous
| Same as to the rankings of men. Top 20% ? Defined how? Ugh. |
Anonymous
| Don't date a lawyer... all lawyer are douches. |
Anonymous
| As a woman, not just a former law student, I find this question and thread offensive. Women can do what they want with their bodies. If your crush doesn't want to date you, that's isn't the fault of every woman in your class. |