Lessons learned: 2025-2026

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:1) Don't ED to a school that no one at your HS matriculates to.

2) Don't ED to a very small SLAC if a significant number of ED admissions are essentially pre-admitted through pre-reads for recruited athletes. The ED admission rate is very misleading but when you take out athletes (who are essentially pre-admitted at 100% by pre-reads and full coach support) and leave some spaces for institutional priorities (First Gen, Low-income, rural, legacy, donor), there is actually very little space left!

3) If you must ED to a reach, emphasize that it is a very long shot, and DC should keep working on applications with the expectation they will NOT get into ED. That will help them bounceback from a deferral or decline.

4) Do NOT panic and ED2 to a lesser choice just because DC is feeling panic/fear/worry about not getting in admitted to their true 1st choice ED1. Let them work through their disappointment, focus on the colleges in the RD pool and while they are writing essays they will fall back in love with their other options.

5) Your DC is still growing/developing through senior year. Over holiday break, DC thinks they may want a bigger, more urban campus (the opposite of their ED1) and also is rethinking major! While they may have been happy with getting into ED1 and being "done" with the process over holiday break (a true bonus), I suspect in the long run not getting in and having more options to consider over the course of the year will be better for them.

Just know, you won't be getting in Rd, where there's 10-12x the amount of competition and not that many more seats available.


Just stop. You keep saying that on every thread.

My own kid got into 2 Ivies, Hopkins and Pomona RD after getting deferred from Georgetown. Friends similarly did better RD, or were WL and got off WLs RD in May.

Quit trying to scare everyone.

No, I said this on this thread, responding to a comment. More than 1 person can hold an opinion you don't agree with. I love how you casually mention getting into Pomona RD as if your kid didn't also get into 2 ivies-no duh! But if a student is applying Pomona ED and doesn't get acceptance/deferred, good luck getting into Williams or Amherst or Carleton RD.


After Georgetown’s deferral, we were worried the app was weak was my point. Early round rejection or deferral doesn’t necessarily mean RD results will be bad.


This was true for us too but it was also motivation to improve essays for RD. So glad dc applied early even though it didn’t work out, because it was a useful data point.
Anonymous
This post has some helpful information (and it appears that what we've all been saying resonates there too):

https://www.reddit.com/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/1sqvr32/vibe_check/
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any other lessons especially from those who went through the process for the second time or more ?


From our 2nd time around, I'd say stay open-minded and give space for kid 2 to approach it differently from kid 1. My kids are completely different. The only commonality in their college search was neither liked urban schools. #1 wanted big rah-rah schools, didn't want to do many visits, liked VT and so we just focused on finding a few alternatives similar to it in case that didn't work out (fortunately, it did). #2 wanted to do visits and developed a pretty detailed list of preferences. Applied to a lot of schools (LACs) and had no interest in in-state publics but included a couple because we insisted on an in-state safety.


I still remember my mom saying "Your sister really likes UVA, so you would too." We are very different people. (And we weren't even from Virginia!). I ended up at a SLAC.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Advice specifically for those applying to T20 schools:

(1) You can not treat these schools as if they're the same. Each T20 school thinks of themselves as a special snowflake - they're in love with what they consider their own unique strengths, values, sense of community, and institutional personality.

They each have a story about what exactly makes them great, and they each expect applicants to do their homework to understand what makes their school special. And then it's up to your kid to find ways to articulate that in their supplemental essays.

So encourage your kid to invest every ounce of energy they possibly can in tailoring their applications and essays to fit each T20 school individually.

Of course, their odds of getting into those schools is VERY low, but their only chance of admittance is to demonstrate to the schools how well they know them and how exactly they will take advantage of their unique resources and contribute to their community in a way that they value.

It's an absolute PITA. Not gonna lie. And it won't make up for low stats or average ECs etc. But, assuming they have all the other qualifications they need for a school, this extra effort will help a lot.

(2) AND again, there are no guarantees that it will work. Absolutley none. The statistics are clear on this. Even the very best, most "perfect" applicant - the kid that everyone who's ever met them thinks of as a superstar who will surely get into X school - is unlikely to get into that school. It's just statistics. And many such kids don't get into any T20s at all.

(3) We've seen A LOT of mis-matches this year in the T20 space. Kids who applied to 6-8 T-20 schools, were rejected by the ones they loved but accepted by one or two they felt meh about. Which is a special kind of weird place to be.

Specifically, we know two kids who are in to each other's dream school but feeling meh about it. Again, it's not the end of the world in any way, of course. These are excellent schools. But it's odd to see who the schools choose . . . .

(4) So encourage your kid to give it their all in the fall - crush those supplemental essays - but then be ready to pivot hard in late March and April, depending on the results.

"Bloom where you're planted" is a very real thing. But it requires kids and families to let go of their previous hopes and dreams in order to make space for new ones.

Good luck. Reaching for a T20 school is NOT for the faint of heart.


I think we learned the opposite lesson which is that it was totally unpredictable which top schools worked out and it seemed to have little to do with knowing anything about the school. The wild last minute no research apps panned out! I will say that the more internally coherent apps did better - where the various parts reinforced the same points. But it was pretty random.

+1 same

My lesson learned was that college vine seemed wildly optimistic to me but it actually under-predicted my kid’s outcomes.
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