Just got yelled at for leaving my kid alone in in the car while I went to the pharmacy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I don’t care if you leave your kid in the car. It’s not my kid so why would I care? I mean, I also wouldn’t care if he drove off and crashed into the building killing you and himself. Again, not my kid. What I do find unbelievable, is that you, as an adult, a parent, does not have a child that listens to you. I am not bribing my kid to get out of the damn car. I said get out, you get out. I just can’t wrap my head around it….

💯

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

OP left the engine running. Dumb.

What does that have to do with anything? If a carjacker accidentally stole a car with a kid in it, they would either park the car and get out or dump the kid somewhere. Kidnapping is a much more serious crime than car theft. If the criminal was sexually motivated, he can just as easily snatch a kid off a bike, so the car means nothing. OP could have left the doors locked too.

There have been cases where carjackers stole a car with a child and the child ended up being seriously injured or killed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

OP left the engine running. Dumb.

What does that have to do with anything? If a carjacker accidentally stole a car with a kid in it, they would either park the car and get out or dump the kid somewhere. Kidnapping is a much more serious crime than car theft. If the criminal was sexually motivated, he can just as easily snatch a kid off a bike, so the car means nothing. OP could have left the doors locked too.

That kind of trauma is the character building you’re looking for? When OP was upset because the security guard talked to her kid?

Mmm hmm.

Turn off the engine. Why is that so hard for you?

A neurotic high-strung mother is also traumatizing

NO TIMMY GET OUT OF THE CAR *RIGHT NOW* I CAN'T LEAVE YOU FOR TEN MINUTES over an entire childhood causes trauma

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

OP left the engine running. Dumb.

What does that have to do with anything? If a carjacker accidentally stole a car with a kid in it, they would either park the car and get out or dump the kid somewhere. Kidnapping is a much more serious crime than car theft. If the criminal was sexually motivated, he can just as easily snatch a kid off a bike, so the car means nothing. OP could have left the doors locked too.

That kind of trauma is the character building you’re looking for? When OP was upset because the security guard talked to her kid?

Mmm hmm.

Turn off the engine. Why is that so hard for you?

A neurotic high-strung mother is also traumatizing

NO TIMMY GET OUT OF THE CAR *RIGHT NOW* I CAN'T LEAVE YOU FOR TEN MINUTES over an entire childhood causes trauma

You sound high-strung, pp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

OP left the engine running. Dumb.

What does that have to do with anything? If a carjacker accidentally stole a car with a kid in it, they would either park the car and get out or dump the kid somewhere. Kidnapping is a much more serious crime than car theft. If the criminal was sexually motivated, he can just as easily snatch a kid off a bike, so the car means nothing. OP could have left the doors locked too.

There have been cases where carjackers stole a car with a child and the child ended up being seriously injured or killed.

It was recently in the news near me that police chased an alcohol shoplifter in a car, the thieves drove the wrong way up a highway ramp and killed 3 people in a head-on. Does that mean we should stop enforcing shoplifting laws? Where does the what-ifs end?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

OP left the engine running. Dumb.

What does that have to do with anything? If a carjacker accidentally stole a car with a kid in it, they would either park the car and get out or dump the kid somewhere. Kidnapping is a much more serious crime than car theft. If the criminal was sexually motivated, he can just as easily snatch a kid off a bike, so the car means nothing. OP could have left the doors locked too.

That kind of trauma is the character building you’re looking for? When OP was upset because the security guard talked to her kid?

Mmm hmm.

Turn off the engine. Why is that so hard for you?

A neurotic high-strung mother is also traumatizing

NO TIMMY GET OUT OF THE CAR *RIGHT NOW* I CAN'T LEAVE YOU FOR TEN MINUTES over an entire childhood causes trauma

You sound high-strung, pp.

I am. And I realize it is a personality flaw. Even I think it is crazy to agonize about leaving a 7 year old in a car for 10 minutes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

OP left the engine running. Dumb.

What does that have to do with anything? If a carjacker accidentally stole a car with a kid in it, they would either park the car and get out or dump the kid somewhere. Kidnapping is a much more serious crime than car theft. If the criminal was sexually motivated, he can just as easily snatch a kid off a bike, so the car means nothing. OP could have left the doors locked too.

There have been cases where carjackers stole a car with a child and the child ended up being seriously injured or killed.

It was recently in the news near me that police chased an alcohol shoplifter in a car, the thieves drove the wrong way up a highway ramp and killed 3 people in a head-on. Does that mean we should stop enforcing shoplifting laws? Where does the what-ifs end?

What does that have to do with leaving your child in the car?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

It was ten minutes.

You weren't there so you don't actually know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, this thread.

I am curious what the security guard's behavior would have been if OP was a man.

I also used to read in the car at this age while my mom ran errands. She generally gave me a choice. She would not have left the car running so the choice would have been "stay in the uncomfortably hot car and read or come on the boring errand with AC." I usually chose car because I like being warm and love reading.

Some of you are overstating the risk of carjacking. Also isn't the security guard there to prevent carjacking?

I do this sometimes when I need to run in the house to grab something (we live in an apartment building). If I know it will only be a couple minutes, and I can look out the window to check on DC if I need to. DC knows how to get out of the car and come in the building on their own if they needed to.

It's actually good for kids to earn some independence and trust as they get older. It's good parenting to give them opportunities to be alone in public spaces in small doses. In a few years my kid will be in middle school and will be riding a public bus to school on their own. How will they reach the point where that is possible if they are never left alone in public for even a few minutes before the age of 10?

“She would not have left the car running…”

OP left the car running. OP created an unnecessary risk to her child and others.

OP is an idiot.

PP here. Agree I wouldn't leave the car running.

But if OP had turned the car off and cracked windows people would be yelling that she'd risked hot car death (by leaving a child old enough to get out if the car and come find her inside in a car with open windows for a few minutes).

If we had more sane attitudes about supervision of kids this age OP could have just cracked the windows and this would be socially confined. Heck, In a functional society OP should have been able to tell her son "if there's an emergency, talk to that security guard over there" and then let the guard know her son was in the car and the guard would be like "cool, thanks for letting me know."

But we live in a non functional society where leaving a 7 year old who can walk and talk and read and write alone for a few minutes is "child neglect." Meanwhile there are actual cases of child neglect that never get prosecuted because most neglect happens in private homes.

It's idiotic. Did you know in Denmark parents routinely leave babies in strollers outside store and restaurants so they can finish naps? Because they have a social agreement that children are a collective responsibility. They are happier and more well adjusted people than we are

We are not in Denmark. The couple from Denmark who did this in nyc got in big trouble.

Crimes against children are not wildly different between the US and Denmark and in both countries the offender is usually known to the victim

You comment has nothing to do with what I said. Please read carefully and slowly. Everything I said was factual. Here is the story:

https://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/danish-om-still-stung-by-97-arrest-for-leaving-baby-in-nyc/353952/

It has everything to do with what you said. It only makes sense to compare Denmark to the US if they have wildly divergent rates of crimes against children. They do not. We are being hysterical and it makes society miserable.

No, we are not talking about being 'hysterical'. We are talking about societal norms in the US and leaving your kid with the car running whether legal or illegal is not the 'norm' anymore. The person from Denmark forgot they were not in Denmark. Leaving a baby outside while you have drinks inside in NYC is not the norm. So she and her partner got called out. When in Rome act like Romans!

Look, you can fight the system but, if you lose than you lose your whining rights. Jaywalk and get hit by a car? You lose because you aren't going to win against a car. Leave your kid outside in the car instead of dragging his butt inside? Someone might notice and call you out.

Well thank you for admitting its about one-upsman-ship and not safety!

Well if that's what you got from what I said it seems that you mom or dad left you in a hot car and fried a bit of your brain!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

OP left the engine running. Dumb.

What does that have to do with anything? If a carjacker accidentally stole a car with a kid in it, they would either park the car and get out or dump the kid somewhere. Kidnapping is a much more serious crime than car theft. If the criminal was sexually motivated, he can just as easily snatch a kid off a bike, so the car means nothing. OP could have left the doors locked too.

That kind of trauma is the character building you’re looking for? When OP was upset because the security guard talked to her kid?

Mmm hmm.

Turn off the engine. Why is that so hard for you?

A neurotic high-strung mother is also traumatizing

NO TIMMY GET OUT OF THE CAR *RIGHT NOW* I CAN'T LEAVE YOU FOR TEN MINUTES over an entire childhood causes trauma

You sound high-strung, pp.

I am. And I realize it is a personality flaw. Even I think it is crazy to agonize about leaving a 7 year old in a car for 10 minutes.

OP agonized over being yelled at by a security guard for leaving her 7 year-old son alone in a car. In MD, it is against the law. Will she do it again? Probably not if she was upset enough to post on a parenting forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

It was ten minutes.

You weren't there so you don't actually know.

That is what OP stated. You are correct that she could have estimated wrong. The parents that are busted usually underestimate the time they left their child alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More than anything I am afraid this thread illustrates why women are underrepresented in positions of power, authority, and responsibility. Anyone judging OP for this is devoid of critical thinking skills, fundamental logic, and the ability to appropriately assess risk. I would be willing to bet the average Dad wouldn’t think twice about this and would be utterly confused as to why the hell anyone would think a normally developing second grader is incapable of sitting in a car for a short time. It’s a hysterical and illogical overreaction to, dare I say, a nothing-burger.

What OP did was fine. I would not let those of you bashing her be in charge of a deep fryer at McDonald’s, and I certainly wouldn’t take any advice you might have to offer up on child rearing.

OP left the engine running. Dumb.

What does that have to do with anything? If a carjacker accidentally stole a car with a kid in it, they would either park the car and get out or dump the kid somewhere. Kidnapping is a much more serious crime than car theft. If the criminal was sexually motivated, he can just as easily snatch a kid off a bike, so the car means nothing. OP could have left the doors locked too.

There have been cases where carjackers stole a car with a child and the child ended up being seriously injured or killed.

It was recently in the news near me that police chased an alcohol shoplifter in a car, the thieves drove the wrong way up a highway ramp and killed 3 people in a head-on. Does that mean we should stop enforcing shoplifting laws? Where does the what-ifs end?

What does that have to do with leaving your child in the car?

I am giving a counter example demonstrating the absurdity of your degree of "what-if-ism" and how it would lead to absurd conclusions

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, this thread.

I am curious what the security guard's behavior would have been if OP was a man.

I also used to read in the car at this age while my mom ran errands. She generally gave me a choice. She would not have left the car running so the choice would have been "stay in the uncomfortably hot car and read or come on the boring errand with AC." I usually chose car because I like being warm and love reading.

Some of you are overstating the risk of carjacking. Also isn't the security guard there to prevent carjacking?

I do this sometimes when I need to run in the house to grab something (we live in an apartment building). If I know it will only be a couple minutes, and I can look out the window to check on DC if I need to. DC knows how to get out of the car and come in the building on their own if they needed to.

It's actually good for kids to earn some independence and trust as they get older. It's good parenting to give them opportunities to be alone in public spaces in small doses. In a few years my kid will be in middle school and will be riding a public bus to school on their own. How will they reach the point where that is possible if they are never left alone in public for even a few minutes before the age of 10?

“She would not have left the car running…”

OP left the car running. OP created an unnecessary risk to her child and others.

OP is an idiot.

PP here. Agree I wouldn't leave the car running.

But if OP had turned the car off and cracked windows people would be yelling that she'd risked hot car death (by leaving a child old enough to get out if the car and come find her inside in a car with open windows for a few minutes).

If we had more sane attitudes about supervision of kids this age OP could have just cracked the windows and this would be socially confined. Heck, In a functional society OP should have been able to tell her son "if there's an emergency, talk to that security guard over there" and then let the guard know her son was in the car and the guard would be like "cool, thanks for letting me know."

But we live in a non functional society where leaving a 7 year old who can walk and talk and read and write alone for a few minutes is "child neglect." Meanwhile there are actual cases of child neglect that never get prosecuted because most neglect happens in private homes.

It's idiotic. Did you know in Denmark parents routinely leave babies in strollers outside store and restaurants so they can finish naps? Because they have a social agreement that children are a collective responsibility. They are happier and more well adjusted people than we are

We are not in Denmark. The couple from Denmark who did this in nyc got in big trouble.

Crimes against children are not wildly different between the US and Denmark and in both countries the offender is usually known to the victim

You comment has nothing to do with what I said. Please read carefully and slowly. Everything I said was factual. Here is the story:

https://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/danish-om-still-stung-by-97-arrest-for-leaving-baby-in-nyc/353952/

It has everything to do with what you said. It only makes sense to compare Denmark to the US if they have wildly divergent rates of crimes against children. They do not. We are being hysterical and it makes society miserable.

No, we are not talking about being 'hysterical'. We are talking about societal norms in the US and leaving your kid with the car running whether legal or illegal is not the 'norm' anymore. The person from Denmark forgot they were not in Denmark. Leaving a baby outside while you have drinks inside in NYC is not the norm. So she and her partner got called out. When in Rome act like Romans!

Look, you can fight the system but, if you lose than you lose your whining rights. Jaywalk and get hit by a car? You lose because you aren't going to win against a car. Leave your kid outside in the car instead of dragging his butt inside? Someone might notice and call you out.

Well thank you for admitting its about one-upsman-ship and not safety!

Well if that's what you got from what I said it seems that you mom or dad left you in a hot car and fried a bit of your brain!

You literally wrote it's about cultural norms. How do you people function on a daily basis? Just admit you're a busybody and you get off on it.

[Anonymous]

Good, you are a bad parent.

[Anonymous]

Next thing you know, kid messes at the front seat, gets the car going and smashed into other cars, injuries himself and ton of other people.
What the hell i wrong with some people?