Anyone facing jealous friends now that your kids are in private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As someone who admits to being jealous about all sorts of money things from travel to car to home renovations I can 1000 percent say private does not make the list. I have also found the teachers are better on balance in public, esp after learning a very average classmate of mine got a job teaching at sidwell with no prior experience. (Years ago) No doubt smaller class sizes, personal attention/coddling and better facilities come with private, and there’s the occasional bad teacher in public. I’m just one of those people who has different values including socioeconomic diversity, and feels my public is more than good enough to educated kids. And I’m not alone judging by all the Uber educated and wealthy families in our local public.

All the Uber educated and wealthy families at your local public? Thanks for the laugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not that they are jealous, it's that they feel defensive that maybe they should be doing something else with their kids. Try to see it that way, and try to frame your discussion as a decision you made for your own particular individual reasons.

People get sensitive and often feel a need to justify their decisions…
- To attend a public at taxpayer rate and how it works wel for their child
- To attend a private at $X a year, and how it works well for their child
- To home school and how it works well for their child

Same thing happens with colege decisions.

[Anonymous]

I probably would have been jealous in 1993 when top privates around here were like a golden ticket college wise but not anymore.

[Anonymous]

I’m really not sure what I’m supposed to be jealous of. My kids are very happy in public. But then again, I’m also happy with my life so I am not jealous of other people.

[Anonymous]

We often get a "why did you send your kids to Private School?" from our public school friends. I think it's a combination of curiosity and FOMO. We just have to be careful about not saying we like this better and that better at the privates as we don't want to hurt feelings. Honestly, everything is better at the private school: the families, the teachers, the kids, the sports, the facilities, the food, you name it... We hide our enthusiasm though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As someone who admits to being jealous about all sorts of money things from travel to car to home renovations I can 1000 percent say private does not make the list. I have also found the teachers are better on balance in public, esp after learning a very average classmate of mine got a job teaching at sidwell with no prior experience. (Years ago) No doubt smaller class sizes, personal attention/coddling and better facilities come with private, and there’s the occasional bad teacher in public. I’m just one of those people who has different values including socioeconomic diversity, and feels my public is more than good enough to educated kids. And I’m not alone judging by all the Uber educated and wealthy families in our local public.

As someone who lives in a mediocre school district and who has put a kid in both public and private schools, I get tired of hearing UMC parents brag about how they send their kids to public because they value "socio-economic diversity." There needs to be a reality check about these claims. UMC parents are able to send their kids to high-performing public schools which are largely shielded from the kind of socio-economic diversity that really matters in terms of outcomes. There is a huge difference between schools in wealthy areas and schools in poorer areas. Moreover, within the schools themselves, there is differentiation in terms of the highest-performing students, who usually form their own largely homogeneous group, and low-performing students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We often get a "why did you send your kids to Private School?" from our public school friends. I think it's a combination of curiosity and FOMO. We just have to be careful about not saying we like this better and that better at the privates as we don't want to hurt feelings. Honestly, everything is better at the private school: the families, the teachers, the kids, the sports, the facilities, the food, you name it... We hide our enthusiasm though.

Same. We chalk it up to smaller classes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We often get a "why did you send your kids to Private School?" from our public school friends. I think it's a combination of curiosity and FOMO. We just have to be careful about not saying we like this better and that better at the privates as we don't want to hurt feelings. Honestly, everything is better at the private school: the families, the teachers, the kids, the sports, the facilities, the food, you name it... We hide our enthusiasm though.

Same. We chalk it up to smaller classes.

You two are exactly why we didn’t want to go private. The families and kids are better…🤮

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]We often get a "why did you send your kids to Private School?" from our public school friends. I think it's a combination of curiosity and FOMO. We just have to be careful about not saying we like this better and that better at the privates as we don't want to hurt feelings. Honestly, everything is better at the private school: the families, the teachers, the kids, the sports, the facilities, the food, you name it... We hide our enthusiasm though.[/quote]

Yes exactly. People are so competitive here, and DMV people generally lack social skills - so many parents can’t help but directly ask why private. When I get asked this, I think they already know the answer: because we want to and somehow can manage to pay for it. Isn’t that the answer for everything in life you have to buy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We often get a "why did you send your kids to Private School?" from our public school friends. I think it's a combination of curiosity and FOMO. We just have to be careful about not saying we like this better and that better at the privates as we don't want to hurt feelings. Honestly, everything is better at the private school: the families, the teachers, the kids, the sports, the facilities, the food, you name it... We hide our enthusiasm though.

If the families and kids are better at private, why are you still friends with those tawdry public school plebs?

/s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We often get a "why did you send your kids to Private School?" from our public school friends. I think it's a combination of curiosity and FOMO. We just have to be careful about not saying we like this better and that better at the privates as we don't want to hurt feelings. Honestly, everything is better at the private school: the families, the teachers, the kids, the sports, the facilities, the food, you name it... We hide our enthusiasm though.

They're just asking because they want information so they can make the best informed decision for their own kids. Who wouldn't want this info?

[Anonymous]

Would you rather have your kids hang out with and learn from kids that extend their hands and say "Hello, nice to see you Mrs. xxxx" or kids with pants hanging below their Arses and trying to fight other kids for no apparent reason as is the case in our high school. No thanks. Yes, IN GENERAL, the kids are better and come from better families in private schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who admits to being jealous about all sorts of money things from travel to car to home renovations I can 1000 percent say private does not make the list. I have also found the teachers are better on balance in public, esp after learning a very average classmate of mine got a job teaching at sidwell with no prior experience. (Years ago) No doubt smaller class sizes, personal attention/coddling and better facilities come with private, and there’s the occasional bad teacher in public. I’m just one of those people who has different values including socioeconomic diversity, and feels my public is more than good enough to educated kids. And I’m not alone judging by all the Uber educated and wealthy families in our local public.

All the Uber educated and wealthy families at your local public? Thanks for the laugh.

Reminds me of the joke about the person being given a tour of heaven who asked about the big curtained off area. St Peter replied “Those are the Southern Baptists. They don’t know that the rest of you are here.”

We’re a 2 PhD family of researchers with a fair amount of national accolades in our fields. We still have happy hours with parents from our public, including the current president of a large national, frequently in the news national scientific association, a frequent CNN contributor who has been running a DC think tank since he stopped teaching at Harvard, a senior state department official, a senior IC person, and a much cited national journalist.

I’m sure the parents of private school kids are lovely, and I would never presume to make blanket statements about them.

[Anonymous]

Just hop over to the MCPS forum and read the threads about the recent high school brawl that sent kids to the hospital, or the questions about middle school bathroom policies to prevent assault and drug use but also keep children from using bathrooms, or the severe shortage of personnel in certain positions. Our neighbors have asked us why we spend so much money on private school when our W school is so excellent and I just think they have no idea how different our daily experience is, but I’m not going to tell them because then I’m the snob.

[Anonymous]

Either it’s the same private school parent repeatedly responding, or private school parents in general are a whole lot more defensive than their public counterparts