Do you judge other women’s engagement rings?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All my friends with the biggest rings were the last to get married and have families in mid to late 30s. So that’s what I think of when I see big rings. I got engaged to my college sweetheart when I was 23 when we were dirt poor in law school and my ring shows it, ha. I don’t care bc I can wear it everyday. I know so many women with big diamonds that only wear for special occasions, and wear only their bands.

I got married in my 30s and opted for a small ring for the same reason you like your ring from when you were 23. I didn't view my engagement ring as a showy jewelry item. I wanted it to fit in with other daily jewelry, like the delicate gold chain I wear with a small gold flower pendant, and my little gold hoops. I own and wear bigger, showier jewelry, but to me an engagement ring and wedding band are about having that reminder and carrying a little piece of my marriage with me whatever I do. I never worry about traveling with my ring or wearing it in bad neighborhoods or anything really.

I think for some people they think of it differently and like the showiness of a ring as a way to more loudly communicate their relationship status. Which is also fine. With lab stones, that look is now very accessible, which is great for everyone.

I do not think about or judge people for how expensive (or not) their ring looks. I have a small ring that was pretty pricy because we had the money and for me it was more about quality of materials and using a jeweler I really loved, but I am sure most people assume my ring was cheaper. It doesn't matter. The price of a ring is irrelevant to the commitment or love between the couple. That's a separate, practical matter that is none of my business.

So most people I know that were able to afford a really obviously expensive ring also cared about quality and sentimental value. Again, unlike on dcum, this false dichotomy does not exist in the real world. Rich people are also very selective and careful. Crazy!

I wasn't drawing a dichotomy between people who can afford an expensive ring and people who can't. I was drawing a dichotomy between people who want a large ring and people who want a smaller ring that might be more versatile and easier to wear. I opted for the latter even though I could afford a bigger ring because I just don't like wearing a large stone daily. My ring is more expensive than it looks. But the cost of my ring is not relevant. That's the point I was making -- the cost of anyone's ring is not relevant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

Go ahead and see what someone will give you for your diamond. Sure, they’ll turn around and sell it for a good amount but YOU won’t get much at all for it. It’s the biggest shake down in an industry that’s the ultimate shakedown to begin with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

Go ahead and see what someone will give you for your diamond. Sure, they’ll turn around and sell it for a good amount but YOU won’t get much at all for it. It’s the biggest shake down in an industry that’s the ultimate shakedown to begin with.

Oh I get that. But a lab Diamond is scrap. Nobody would ever take it to resell it. You wouldn’t pass it down. Etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is classic dcum. I don’t judge unless it’s big! Then u judge endlessly. Mine is huge. Original was stolen. Years later DH makes a lot of $, and I wanted a bigger one. It’s not a lab. I don’t care what anyone thinks of it, I love.

If you didn't care what anyone thinks, you wouldn't have a ring at all. The whole thing is a pop culture fad made to prop up a gross industry and perpetuated by people who want people to think certain things about them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lol. This is such a dumb American thing invented by DeBeers. So many cultures in the world don't even have engagement rings, and Americans never even wore them before the 20th century.

We don't even wear wedding bands. Definitely didn't want to piss away thousands of dollars on stupid carbon that's the same thing as in charcoal and pencil lead. Really stupid brainwashing. Much better using that money to buy a house or invest.

Americans are so dumb. Blowing tens of thousands in debt to buy a ring and have a big wedding. Nothing like staring out life in massive amounts of debt on top of studentoans all because you both got into the studios wedding industry's propaganda that you need engagement rings and weddings.

This is so comically pathetic. Tell us how very much you care about this without actually telling us...

PP needs to state their case in short declarative sentences and not repeat the use of a certain word like "dumb" because this shows their are not educated.

besides no one cares what she thinks. She can say "Americans are dumb" as long as she wants.

My 20 year anniversary gift is a 4.7 emerald cut diamond with large emerald cut side stones. VVS. F. Yes, my husband loves me a lot

A large ring usually makes up for other... *cough* shortcomings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

Go ahead and see what someone will give you for your diamond. Sure, they’ll turn around and sell it for a good amount but YOU won’t get much at all for it. It’s the biggest shake down in an industry that’s the ultimate shakedown to begin with.

I agree with this. If I was looking to buy a diamond now, I would only consider lab… you might not be able to resell for a lot, but you’re also not paying a crazy amount. With mined diamonds they are so expensive and then you don’t get much back anyway if you try to sell. The total financial loss end up being greater.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

Go ahead and see what someone will give you for your diamond. Sure, they’ll turn around and sell it for a good amount but YOU won’t get much at all for it. It’s the biggest shake down in an industry that’s the ultimate shakedown to begin with.

Oh I get that. But a lab Diamond is scrap. Nobody would ever take it to resell it. You wouldn’t pass it down. Etc.

I would the same as I would mined. In a nice setting, why not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

Go ahead and see what someone will give you for your diamond. Sure, they’ll turn around and sell it for a good amount but YOU won’t get much at all for it. It’s the biggest shake down in an industry that’s the ultimate shakedown to begin with.

Oh I get that. But a lab Diamond is scrap. Nobody would ever take it to resell it. You wouldn’t pass it down. Etc.

I got my ring way before the lab diamond shift but... why couldn't you pass it down? People pass down costume jewelry. And there's nothing wrong with a lab diamond, it's just not as "special" as a mined diamond. It's still pretty (sometimes prettier because they are perfect). Plus a ring is more than a diamond, there's the band as well.

If my mother had a lab diamond ring and it was a pretty ring and she left it to me, I don't think I'd care that it was a lab diamond. I really don't. It's not like it is going to crumble to dust. It's a diamond.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

Go ahead and see what someone will give you for your diamond. Sure, they’ll turn around and sell it for a good amount but YOU won’t get much at all for it. It’s the biggest shake down in an industry that’s the ultimate shakedown to begin with.

Oh I get that. But a lab Diamond is scrap. Nobody would ever take it to resell it. You wouldn’t pass it down. Etc.

I got my ring way before the lab diamond shift but... why couldn't you pass it down? People pass down costume jewelry. And there's nothing wrong with a lab diamond, it's just not as "special" as a mined diamond. It's still pretty (sometimes prettier because they are perfect). Plus a ring is more than a diamond, there's the band as well.

If my mother had a lab diamond ring and it was a pretty ring and she left it to me, I don't think I'd care that it was a lab diamond. I really don't. It's not like it is going to crumble to dust. It's a diamond.

Hmmm, I don’t jnow. The cost just keeps dropping like crazy. I was just looking to replace a lost ring and the cost for my original diamond size was $30k. The cost for a lab the same size was literally $6k. And no, they’re not all perfect it’s like regular diamonds. They have flaws, colors etc. I just feel like if it’s that cheap …?

[Anonymous]

If you have a legit stone with a GIA certification # you can look it up for appraisal. The appraisal for the stone I bought for DW for engagement still similar value as when purchased.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

Go ahead and see what someone will give you for your diamond. Sure, they’ll turn around and sell it for a good amount but YOU won’t get much at all for it. It’s the biggest shake down in an industry that’s the ultimate shakedown to begin with.

Oh I get that. But a lab Diamond is scrap. Nobody would ever take it to resell it. You wouldn’t pass it down. Etc.

I got my ring way before the lab diamond shift but... why couldn't you pass it down? People pass down costume jewelry. And there's nothing wrong with a lab diamond, it's just not as "special" as a mined diamond. It's still pretty (sometimes prettier because they are perfect). Plus a ring is more than a diamond, there's the band as well.

If my mother had a lab diamond ring and it was a pretty ring and she left it to me, I don't think I'd care that it was a lab diamond. I really don't. It's not like it is going to crumble to dust. It's a diamond.

Hmmm, I don’t jnow. The cost just keeps dropping like crazy. I was just looking to replace a lost ring and the cost for my original diamond size was $30k. The cost for a lab the same size was literally $6k. And no, they’re not all perfect it’s like regular diamonds. They have flaws, colors etc. I just feel like if it’s that cheap …?

Lol what is the inherent value of a mined diamond? It doesn't have one. It's pressurized coal. Your diamond cost 30k due to high demand and relative scarcity. Lab diamonds upend this dynamic by eliminating scarcity. Not only are there more diamonds, but you have the ability to keep making more and more very easily.

But they are all diamonds. The quality of a lab diamond is not inferior. A diamond is a diamond. You literally just said it -- "they're not all perfect it's like regular diamonds." Because they are regular diamonds!

I know this might be a hard pill to swallow if you spent that much on your ring, but it was only "worth" that because lots of people wanted one and there weren't enough rings of that size and quality for them to cost less. But now there are. The intrinsic qualities of the diamond have not changed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

Go ahead and see what someone will give you for your diamond. Sure, they’ll turn around and sell it for a good amount but YOU won’t get much at all for it. It’s the biggest shake down in an industry that’s the ultimate shakedown to begin with.

Oh I get that. But a lab Diamond is scrap. Nobody would ever take it to resell it. You wouldn’t pass it down. Etc.

I got my ring way before the lab diamond shift but... why couldn't you pass it down? People pass down costume jewelry. And there's nothing wrong with a lab diamond, it's just not as "special" as a mined diamond. It's still pretty (sometimes prettier because they are perfect). Plus a ring is more than a diamond, there's the band as well.

If my mother had a lab diamond ring and it was a pretty ring and she left it to me, I don't think I'd care that it was a lab diamond. I really don't. It's not like it is going to crumble to dust. It's a diamond.

Hmmm, I don’t jnow. The cost just keeps dropping like crazy. I was just looking to replace a lost ring and the cost for my original diamond size was $30k. The cost for a lab the same size was literally $6k. And no, they’re not all perfect it’s like regular diamonds. They have flaws, colors etc. I just feel like if it’s that cheap …?

Np but labs look the same and perform the same as mined. They could be worth nothing but if you like the look of a diamond what’s the point of mined when you have to pay so much more.

I also wonder if all diamonds will stop being viewed or assumed to be valuable over time as labs drop in price and the market gets flooded with more diamonds. If everyone has a big diamond, I feel like people with money to burn will have to move on to something else to communicate that they spent a lot on their ring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lab stones are so weird to me. I wouldn’t do it. They have no resale value - at least a real diamond has some and has actual market value. An engagement ring should be expensive. It means something. I want to be able to give my ring to my kids. I doubt they’d want some costume jewelry. It feels like buying a fake Chanel off canal street. Sure, they’re made in the same factory! They’re basically the same! But one is actually made by the earth naturally forever ago and one is made in a microwave. It seems so unromantic.

Lab stones are real diamonds without the ethical issues.
Mined diamonds have horrible resale.

The resale value of natural diamonds is not terrible. No worse than lots of other luxury items. Large market for vintage Tiffany pieces etc. large market for large stones. Old mine cuts.

The ethical piece is simply used as a tool by those who want a big rock and don’t want to pay. I don’t believe for a second that’s the motivator. If that’s true, they wouldn’t be supporting the market. And if that’s the case, don’t own a cell phone or other electronic clearly made by slave labor. Isn’t that just as terrible? Yes. Yes it is.

Go ahead and see what someone will give you for your diamond. Sure, they’ll turn around and sell it for a good amount but YOU won’t get much at all for it. It’s the biggest shake down in an industry that’s the ultimate shakedown to begin with.

Oh I get that. But a lab Diamond is scrap. Nobody would ever take it to resell it. You wouldn’t pass it down. Etc.

I got my ring way before the lab diamond shift but... why couldn't you pass it down? People pass down costume jewelry. And there's nothing wrong with a lab diamond, it's just not as "special" as a mined diamond. It's still pretty (sometimes prettier because they are perfect). Plus a ring is more than a diamond, there's the band as well.

If my mother had a lab diamond ring and it was a pretty ring and she left it to me, I don't think I'd care that it was a lab diamond. I really don't. It's not like it is going to crumble to dust. It's a diamond.

Hmmm, I don’t jnow. The cost just keeps dropping like crazy. I was just looking to replace a lost ring and the cost for my original diamond size was $30k. The cost for a lab the same size was literally $6k. And no, they’re not all perfect it’s like regular diamonds. They have flaws, colors etc. I just feel like if it’s that cheap …?

Lol what is the inherent value of a mined diamond? It doesn't have one. It's pressurized coal. Your diamond cost 30k due to high demand and relative scarcity. Lab diamonds upend this dynamic by eliminating scarcity. Not only are there more diamonds, but you have the ability to keep making more and more very easily.

But they are all diamonds. The quality of a lab diamond is not inferior. A diamond is a diamond. You literally just said it -- "they're not all perfect it's like regular diamonds." Because they are regular diamonds!

I know this might be a hard pill to swallow if you spent that much on your ring, but it was only "worth" that because lots of people wanted one and there weren't enough rings of that size and quality for them to cost less. But now there are. The intrinsic qualities of the diamond have not changed.

The price has gone up for a real same sized diamond. And it is possible to tell a lab on an easy scope scan. I also assume people that have enormous ones have labs. I just wouldn’t do it. Go right ahead, who is stopping you. Just seems trashy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is classic dcum. I don’t judge unless it’s big! Then u judge endlessly. Mine is huge. Original was stolen. Years later DH makes a lot of $, and I wanted a bigger one. It’s not a lab. I don’t care what anyone thinks of it, I love.

If you didn't care what anyone thinks, you wouldn't have a ring at all. The whole thing is a pop culture fad made to prop up a gross industry and perpetuated by people who want people to think certain things about them.

Generally agree with this, other than the “you wouldn’t have a ring at all” part. To me the symbolism of matching rings makes perfect sense. If you weren’t trying to impress others, you’d each have whatever ring you loved the best. For me, that will always involve rubies, emeralds, or labradorite. Maybe a sapphire if it’s really vivid.

I like simple bands of gold and silver too, but basically always want to have the rush of looking down and seeing colors that make me think of Jolly Ranchers.