Why are so many women here so angry with / resentful toward women who stay home?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think there is some jealous there. In the DC area, one partner has to be making a lot of money to enable the other to stay home and still maintain a nice lifestyle (nice house in a close in nabe, vacations, nice cars, pricey extracurricular activities for the kiddos, maybe private school, etc.)

To have an UMC lifestyle with a SAHP, the breadwinner has to be making 300-400k +.

On my end its less jealous and more...disbelief. I was raised to be independent and to own my own financials. When I went into my marriage I was comfortably set in a career and had two properties free-and-clear. That only helped when we made future decisions together to buy our 'dream' home. It boggles my mind that some women will rely solely on another person's generosity to live their life.

It disturbs me even further when these same women, some of them friends, were die-hard Hillary fans and very much into telling their daughters that 'this will be the first woman president, someone to look up to, someone to emulate' and yet the closest rolemodel to those daughters completely opted out of a career. How can you tell your children to aspire to be the head of NASA or a president or a multi-millionaire CEO, but you didn't bother to do anything yourself?

Not relying on someone's generosity. I, along with my husband, decided together how to structure our lives. If you can't trust your spouse, you need to reevaluate your relationship.

This is funny. Especially since there are thousands of posts about women who stay in crappy marriages with cheating husbands/abusive husbands because they want the money and the life style and would otherwise be out on the street without their DH.

[Anonymous]

Having done both, it is definitely possible to find being a sah boring. I could not wait to get back to work once my kids were school age. I know many people feel the same as most of the sahs I knew did the same . feminism started because some, not all woman, did not enjoy being homemakers. It is not surprising that some women today enjoy staying home and others do not. It is not a right or wrong situation.

Ibdo wish it was easier for all moms to take more time at home with babies and toddlers. I think more would if there was a clear path back to working.

[Anonymous]

Hey bitches! If your daughters think you're all great because you have a career in law, science or finance, just brace yourselves! You think they look up to you because of your lousy career. Let's not get ahead of ourselves because this generation of women ar going ng to look up to Melania Trump.

If I have a daughter she would be a classically trained gold digger. Hope she's a beauty with long legs a thigh gap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hey bitches! If your daughters think you're all great because you have a career in law, science or finance, just brace yourselves! You think they look up to you because of your lousy career. Let's not get ahead of ourselves because this generation of women ar going ng to look up to Melania Trump.

If I have a daughter she would be a classically trained gold digger. Hope she's a beauty with long legs a thigh gap.

SO SAD.



We need to move forward not backwards.

No one says bearing and raising children is not important work. It is, but with a lifespan now of 90 years and at least 4 years of college education + 5 years of experience working, it is a shame to have a qualified, educated and intelligent woman walk back into the kitchen barefoot and cleaning toilets.

House chores do not take 90 years. Neither does raising children.

Chin up ladies, lets meet our full potentials. WE SHALL RISE!

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]Having done both, it is definitely possible to find being a sah boring. I could not wait to get back to work once my kids were school age. I know many people feel the same as most of the sahs I knew did the same . feminism started because some, not all woman, did not enjoy being homemakers. It is not surprising that some women today enjoy staying home and others do not. It is not a right or wrong situation.

Ibdo wish it was easier for all moms to take more time at home with babies and toddlers. I think more would if there was a clear path back to working.

[/quote]

Ditto. I loved my years at home but was eager to get back to a FT job once my youngest was in kindergarten. Fortunately, I'd kept up my resume and connections via occasional freelancing and found it pretty easy to find a FT job with good hours and flexibility to WAH when I need to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hey bitches! If your daughters think you're all great because you have a career in law, science or finance, just brace yourselves! You think they look up to you because of your lousy career. Let's not get ahead of ourselves because this generation of women ar going ng to look up to Melania Trump.

If I have a daughter she would be a classically trained gold digger. Hope she's a beauty with long legs a thigh gap.

Apparently you are one unhappy person. Nothing wrong with Melania Trump so you outed yourself there too.

I'm grateful we live in a society where women from all backgrounds have choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well I love being a sahm. I have 3 kids 2 in school and one in half days for the next two years. It's the perfect amount of free time/childcare for me. Sometimes I feel bad for my H when I think about what my typical day looks like. Today I have a hair appointment (I love not having to go on Saturdays anymore), lunch with my mom, DD's ice skating lesson, and a play date at the park with a friend later with her kids. Lovely. I feel so lucky that this is my "job." I never get that miserable feeling in the pit of my stomach on Sunday afternoons anymore. He likes that I'm home with the kids full thing me though so I don't feel too bad.

It's about choices for ones family. It doesn't matter if one chooses to stay home and work, or outside the home. You'll always have miserable people who are unhappy and project it onto others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read this whole thread, so likely someone has already pointed this out, but being a sahm does not mean that is the only thing you ever did. I'm a former scientist turned sahm. My kids love hearing about the research that I used to do, and I am instilling a love of science in both my son and my daughter. I doubt my daughter would list becoming an astronaut as one of her aspirations if she was hanging out with a nanny after school instead of watching NASA videos of the ISS with me. I actually worked part time until my second child was born, and frankly, because I made it a point to always work around my first child's schedule, he didn't even notice that I was working. So, if you think that the only example of women having choices is by taking time away from your kids, you're wrong. Kudos to those who have flexible jobs that allow them to be there for their kids when needed, without a whole lot of stress on the entire family. For many of us, that is not realistic. My staying home benefits my entire family by allowing us to always make whatever choice is best for the kids (such as keeping them at home when they are even slightly sick and not worrying about summer plans) without the stress of dealing with an employer's expectations. With my particular career, that flexibility would not have been possible if I continued to woh. My former professsional interests have a greater influence on my kids' interests than my husband's current career because I get to spend more time with our kids than he does. So, if anything, by staying home, I am actually guiding my daughter toward interests in stem to a greater extent than if I was still woh.

so your daughter is more likely to become a scientist because you used to be a scientist but now SAH, as opposed to if you were still a working scientist? Riiiiiight.

NP The cognitive dissonance of these presumably educated women is unbelievable , but then again we have a man with the vocabulary of a four year old as president , thanks in no small part to some of these women

I tutored a man in reading once who owned his own company, and was very successful. Trump seems to be someone who understand practical application unlike many past presidents. I'm afraid ignorance runs in all circles, definitely in yours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well I love being a sahm. I have 3 kids 2 in school and one in half days for the next two years. It's the perfect amount of free time/childcare for me. Sometimes I feel bad for my H when I think about what my typical day looks like. Today I have a hair appointment (I love not having to go on Saturdays anymore), lunch with my mom, DD's ice skating lesson, and a play date at the park with a friend later with her kids. Lovely. I feel so lucky that this is my "job." I never get that miserable feeling in the pit of my stomach on Sunday afternoons anymore. He likes that I'm home with the kids full thing me though so I don't feel too bad.

It's about choices for ones family. It doesn't matter if one chooses to stay home and work, or outside the home. You'll always have miserable people who are unhappy and project it onto others.

Oh, the hypocrisy!??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey bitches! If your daughters think you're all great because you have a career in law, science or finance, just brace yourselves! You think they look up to you because of your lousy career. Let's not get ahead of ourselves because this generation of women ar going ng to look up to Melania Trump.

If I have a daughter she would be a classically trained gold digger. Hope she's a beauty with long legs a thigh gap.

SO SAD.



We need to move forward not backwards.

No one says bearing and raising children is not important work. It is, but with a lifespan now of 90 years and at least 4 years of college education + 5 years of experience working, it is a shame to have a qualified, educated and intelligent woman walk back into the kitchen barefoot and cleaning toilets.

House chores do not take 90 years. Neither does raising children.

Chin up ladies, lets meet our full potentials. WE SHALL RISE!

Yes!

[Anonymous]

LOL There's no we in this equation! It's a personal choice and neither is right or wrong.

Most work, stay home and go back to work. For those that don't go back who can afford it, then more power to them. If you're happy you did it right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women resent SAHP because of the way they feel about themselves. If they are OH working Moms, they feel stressed and guilty about daycare or time with kids. OH working Moms are doing this BS to themselves and projecting the blame on SAHP. I am a working Mom too.

There are three ways you can handle career/parenting:

1. Have your big dream career in your twenties and thirties, invest your $, have kids and be a SAHP later in life.

2. Have your kids in your twenties and thirties, then have a dream career later in life.

3. Have your big dream career and kids at the same time

IMHO, #1 is the way to go if you can pull it off. #2 is the next best. #3 is what most of us do, and we are very busy, very stressed and honestly most days either the job or the family are not getting optimum attention. Just keeping it real.

I did number 1. My DD is now 15. I am 56. Now what do I do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:White people problem or 1st World problem? I can not decide.

However, this is the only country in the world where such inane conversations happen. Am I surprised that this level of ignorance and self indulgence spawned Trump? Not really.

Definitely white women problems. I'm AA and the women in my family have always worked, my sister and I are the first women to ever even have the opportunity to stay home and be housewives.

You're all really weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women resent SAHP because of the way they feel about themselves. If they are OH working Moms, they feel stressed and guilty about daycare or time with kids. OH working Moms are doing this BS to themselves and projecting the blame on SAHP. I am a working Mom too.

There are three ways you can handle career/parenting:

1. Have your big dream career in your twenties and thirties, invest your $, have kids and be a SAHP later in life.

2. Have your kids in your twenties and thirties, then have a dream career later in life.

3. Have your big dream career and kids at the same time

IMHO, #1 is the way to go if you can pull it off. #2 is the next best. #3 is what most of us do, and we are very busy, very stressed and honestly most days either the job or the family are not getting optimum attention. Just keeping it real.

I did number 1. My DD is now 15. I am 56. Now what do I do?

Whatever you want?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well I love being a sahm. I have 3 kids 2 in school and one in half days for the next two years. It's the perfect amount of free time/childcare for me. Sometimes I feel bad for my H when I think about what my typical day looks like. Today I have a hair appointment (I love not having to go on Saturdays anymore), lunch with my mom, DD's ice skating lesson, and a play date at the park with a friend later with her kids. Lovely. I feel so lucky that this is my "job." I never get that miserable feeling in the pit of my stomach on Sunday afternoons anymore. He likes that I'm home with the kids full thing me though so I don't feel too bad.

It's about choices for ones family. It doesn't matter if one chooses to stay home and work, or outside the home. You'll always have miserable people who are unhappy and project it onto others.

Oh, the hypocrisy!??

It sucks to be miserable doesn't it??!