How can you cheat and not think about how it will affect your kids?

[Anonymous]

Sex is not at the core of the family unit. A legal marriage certificate is. That is the foundation—not the parents sexual relationship or lack thereof. It does not affect their emotional or financial health. Sex has nothing to do with that. A divorce might affect that but divorce can happen anyway and cheating does not cause divorce. The act itself is not detrimental. Grown ups can also divorce amicably to minimize any impacts in any situation, including cheating. You still assume people always get discovered or always get divorced...not necessarily true. Many wives stay anyway. In cases where divorce happens, it was probably going to happen anyway. Most people do not cheat unless there are major relationship issues and in most cases, that marriage is broken. The cheater is too conflict avoidant to bring up issues and seeks intimacy elsewhere. That has nothing to do with kids.

You sir are an idiot

A man

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can summarize the views here in three line:

Cheating hurts kids (written by people who have been cheated on)
Cheating has nothing to do with kids (written by cheaters)
Y'all are too invested in your parent's sex life (written by everyone else)

Nah. I have never seen cheated on but have endured the consequences of a cheating FIL for years. I am definitely category one, but not because I was cheated on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Sex is not at the core of the family unit. A legal marriage certificate is. That is the foundation—not the parents sexual relationship or lack thereof. It does not affect their emotional or financial health. Sex has nothing to do with that. A divorce might affect that but divorce can happen anyway and cheating does not cause divorce. The act itself is not detrimental. Grown ups can also divorce amicably to minimize any impacts in any situation, including cheating. You still assume people always get discovered or always get divorced...not necessarily true. Many wives stay anyway. In cases where divorce happens, it was probably going to happen anyway. Most people do not cheat unless there are major relationship issues and in most cases, that marriage is broken. The cheater is too conflict avoidant to bring up issues and seeks intimacy elsewhere. That has nothing to do with kids.

You sir are an idiot

A man

I am the PP. I am a woman. Married more than a decade. I could care less about cheating. People act like it is the worst thing ever. There are much worse things.

[Anonymous]

^. No one is comparing all the bad things that can happen to a couple. Nevertheless, cheating will negatively impact children/spouse/family. What

[Anonymous]

LOL some of the people are now saying in the other thread on marriage core issues that the children who commented on this thread would have blamed parents anyway in life even if there were no affair issue to blame on parents. I suppose inferring that kids reaction should be discounted?

All these men say that they have affairs so that they can maintain home life for their kids on one hand and then are quick to blame their kids by saying kids are complainers anyway for reacting to affairs in a certain way.

Hypocrisy at its best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sex is not at the core of the family unit. A legal marriage certificate is. That is the foundation—not the parents sexual relationship or lack thereof. It does not affect their emotional or financial health. Sex has nothing to do with that. A divorce might affect that but divorce can happen anyway and cheating does not cause divorce. The act itself is not detrimental. Grown ups can also divorce amicably to minimize any impacts in any situation, including cheating. You still assume people always get discovered or always get divorced...not necessarily true. Many wives stay anyway. In cases where divorce happens, it was probably going to happen anyway. Most people do not cheat unless there are major relationship issues and in most cases, that marriage is broken. The cheater is too conflict avoidant to bring up issues and seeks intimacy elsewhere. That has nothing to do with kids.

You sir are an idiot

A man

I am the PP. I am a woman. Married more than a decade. I could care less about cheating. People act like it is the worst thing ever. There are much worse things.

NP. Okay, I want to know what happened to you that you would have this attitude!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sex is not at the core of the family unit. A legal marriage certificate is. That is the foundation—not the parents sexual relationship or lack thereof. It does not affect their emotional or financial health. Sex has nothing to do with that. A divorce might affect that but divorce can happen anyway and cheating does not cause divorce. The act itself is not detrimental. Grown ups can also divorce amicably to minimize any impacts in any situation, including cheating. You still assume people always get discovered or always get divorced...not necessarily true. Many wives stay anyway. In cases where divorce happens, it was probably going to happen anyway. Most people do not cheat unless there are major relationship issues and in most cases, that marriage is broken. The cheater is too conflict avoidant to bring up issues and seeks intimacy elsewhere. That has nothing to do with kids.

You sir are an idiot

A man

I am the PP. I am a woman. Married more than a decade. I could care less about cheating. People act like it is the worst thing ever. There are much worse things.

NP. Okay, I want to know what happened to you that you would have this attitude!

PP here. I have no idea what you mean. I am a logical person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sex is not at the core of the family unit. A legal marriage certificate is. That is the foundation—not the parents sexual relationship or lack thereof. It does not affect their emotional or financial health. Sex has nothing to do with that. A divorce might affect that but divorce can happen anyway and cheating does not cause divorce. The act itself is not detrimental. Grown ups can also divorce amicably to minimize any impacts in any situation, including cheating. You still assume people always get discovered or always get divorced...not necessarily true. Many wives stay anyway. In cases where divorce happens, it was probably going to happen anyway. Most people do not cheat unless there are major relationship issues and in most cases, that marriage is broken. The cheater is too conflict avoidant to bring up issues and seeks intimacy elsewhere. That has nothing to do with kids.

You sir are an idiot

A man

I am the PP. I am a woman. Married more than a decade. I could care less about cheating. People act like it is the worst thing ever. There are much worse things.

NP. Okay, I want to know what happened to you that you would have this attitude!

PP here. I have no idea what you mean. I am a logical person.

Women cheat too. She's probably the one cheating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sex is not at the core of the family unit. A legal marriage certificate is. That is the foundation—not the parents sexual relationship or lack thereof. It does not affect their emotional or financial health. Sex has nothing to do with that. A divorce might affect that but divorce can happen anyway and cheating does not cause divorce. The act itself is not detrimental. Grown ups can also divorce amicably to minimize any impacts in any situation, including cheating. You still assume people always get discovered or always get divorced...not necessarily true. Many wives stay anyway. In cases where divorce happens, it was probably going to happen anyway. Most people do not cheat unless there are major relationship issues and in most cases, that marriage is broken. The cheater is too conflict avoidant to bring up issues and seeks intimacy elsewhere. That has nothing to do with kids.

You sir are an idiot

A man

I am the PP. I am a woman. Married more than a decade. I could care less about cheating. People act like it is the worst thing ever. There are much worse things.

NP. Okay, I want to know what happened to you that you would have this attitude!

PP here. I have no idea what you mean. I am a logical person.

Women cheat too. She's probably the one cheating.

PP here. Nope. I said early in the marriage that cheating was not on my “must divorce” list. I would prefer cheating to lack of general respect, time together or other things. I always understood why the French often have mistresses and it is not a huge deal. Marriage is more than sex.