Napping on vacation when you have kids?

Anonymous
Sounds like he has cancer or apnea. Normal people don't nap in the middle of the day.
Anonymous
OP does your DH eat an unusually heavy lunch and/or drink alcohol with lunch when he normally doesn’t?

I say this as we are currently on vacation and my DH fell asleep after lunch on the sofa despite only planning to be at the condo for a short time to change clothing etc.

On vacation my DH orders heavier food for lunch then usual and usually has a drink or two also (thinking hey-it’s vacation). That is fine and all, but it is a recipe for sleepiness hence a nap if he even sits down at all.

I would not care if we were not traveling with the kids…I’d just read or play on my phone. But our kids get bored and don’t want to sit around waiting for him to wake up either. Annoying. They are clamoring to do this or that- most of which require me to take them- while DH snoozes away.

At any rate OP- perhaps his lunch is a factor? Or alcohol?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s so weird how ppl don’t read the post. It’s like they’re super sensitive about this and talking about their own problems.

It’s all pretty laid out - she doesn’t want him there 24 hours, but the kids want to do certain things with their parents. They want to do it with him, but he’s got an inflexible nap schedule on vacations, so she always has to do the damn stuff. She feels bad about the kids and she feels bad that she doesn’t get a breaks

She doesn’t need advice about what 12yo kids can do without their parents or sermons from people whose vacations are lower key or advice that she should just reschedule the activities.

I know exactly what she’s talking about. Last spring break we went to Cancun - some days there was nothing but pool and the kids went to the kids club, but by far, the highlight of the kids trip was going to Xcaret water/adventure park - it was a day and an outing that there was no scheduling around, and this guys family wouldn’t have been able to go because he wouldn’t move his nap. I agree with the ppl who are like “you don’t have to have an action packed trip” - we certainly didn’t, it was 1/7 days, and it was a kid driven outing.

My kids aren’t old enough to do para sailing but the resort we were at offered it only in the afternoons when they had wind. The scuba trips, mid afternoon. In my experience at a resort like we went to, the pool dies down midday, some people go nap, but if you’re having an activity that’s prime time.

If it was up to me, I’d never leave the pool side, I’d nap, I’d watch the girls, I’d read a book and my kids could go sit in the room and watch Nickelodeon - fine with me! But it’s a family vacation, we’re here to show them a good time, so, if one one or two days out of the vacation I have to give up my mid afternoon by the pool, that’s fine. I’m their dad and, like a lot of dadhood, it can be a real pain in the moment, but it’s special for them and I never regret it.

This guy should man up, grab an iced coffee, and 2 afternoons of the trip, power through, without a tantrum, to do something fun with the kids. Not sure why this is controversial.

It's so weird how you didn't read the OP either. No where did OP say that he wouldn't skip his nap, ever. In fact OP talks about his behaviour when he does skip naps, so clearly he does sometimes.


I’m not sure if you think you’ll convince me with semantics, but if we’re being adults and not trolling we understand that an angry husband throwing tantrums is not the same as explicitly refusing to move his nap, but is the same thing.


She said nothing about throwing a tantrum or refusing to move a nap. We know she said:” if we don’t head back to the hotel, he slogs between 4-dinner time.”

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s so weird how ppl don’t read the post. It’s like they’re super sensitive about this and talking about their own problems.

It’s all pretty laid out - she doesn’t want him there 24 hours, but the kids want to do certain things with their parents. They want to do it with him, but he’s got an inflexible nap schedule on vacations, so she always has to do the damn stuff. She feels bad about the kids and she feels bad that she doesn’t get a breaks

She doesn’t need advice about what 12yo kids can do without their parents or sermons from people whose vacations are lower key or advice that she should just reschedule the activities.

I know exactly what she’s talking about. Last spring break we went to Cancun - some days there was nothing but pool and the kids went to the kids club, but by far, the highlight of the kids trip was going to Xcaret water/adventure park - it was a day and an outing that there was no scheduling around, and this guys family wouldn’t have been able to go because he wouldn’t move his nap. I agree with the ppl who are like “you don’t have to have an action packed trip” - we certainly didn’t, it was 1/7 days, and it was a kid driven outing.

My kids aren’t old enough to do para sailing but the resort we were at offered it only in the afternoons when they had wind. The scuba trips, mid afternoon. In my experience at a resort like we went to, the pool dies down midday, some people go nap, but if you’re having an activity that’s prime time.

If it was up to me, I’d never leave the pool side, I’d nap, I’d watch the girls, I’d read a book and my kids could go sit in the room and watch Nickelodeon - fine with me! But it’s a family vacation, we’re here to show them a good time, so, if one one or two days out of the vacation I have to give up my mid afternoon by the pool, that’s fine. I’m their dad and, like a lot of dadhood, it can be a real pain in the moment, but it’s special for them and I never regret it.

This guy should man up, grab an iced coffee, and 2 afternoons of the trip, power through, without a tantrum, to do something fun with the kids. Not sure why this is controversial.

It's so weird how you didn't read the OP either. No where did OP say that he wouldn't skip his nap, ever. In fact OP talks about his behaviour when he does skip naps, so clearly he does sometimes.


I’m not sure if you think you’ll convince me with semantics, but if we’re being adults and not trolling we understand that an angry husband throwing tantrums is not the same as explicitly refusing to move his nap, but is the same thing.


She said nothing about throwing a tantrum or refusing to move a nap. We know she said:” if we don’t head back to the hotel, he slogs between 4-dinner time.”



Change the narrative anyway you want - we all know he’s a dud and not much of a dad, and if he’s this much of a tool on vacay he’s probably a nightmare at home.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s so weird how ppl don’t read the post. It’s like they’re super sensitive about this and talking about their own problems.

It’s all pretty laid out - she doesn’t want him there 24 hours, but the kids want to do certain things with their parents. They want to do it with him, but he’s got an inflexible nap schedule on vacations, so she always has to do the damn stuff. She feels bad about the kids and she feels bad that she doesn’t get a breaks

She doesn’t need advice about what 12yo kids can do without their parents or sermons from people whose vacations are lower key or advice that she should just reschedule the activities.

I know exactly what she’s talking about. Last spring break we went to Cancun - some days there was nothing but pool and the kids went to the kids club, but by far, the highlight of the kids trip was going to Xcaret water/adventure park - it was a day and an outing that there was no scheduling around, and this guys family wouldn’t have been able to go because he wouldn’t move his nap. I agree with the ppl who are like “you don’t have to have an action packed trip” - we certainly didn’t, it was 1/7 days, and it was a kid driven outing.

My kids aren’t old enough to do para sailing but the resort we were at offered it only in the afternoons when they had wind. The scuba trips, mid afternoon. In my experience at a resort like we went to, the pool dies down midday, some people go nap, but if you’re having an activity that’s prime time.

If it was up to me, I’d never leave the pool side, I’d nap, I’d watch the girls, I’d read a book and my kids could go sit in the room and watch Nickelodeon - fine with me! But it’s a family vacation, we’re here to show them a good time, so, if one one or two days out of the vacation I have to give up my mid afternoon by the pool, that’s fine. I’m their dad and, like a lot of dadhood, it can be a real pain in the moment, but it’s special for them and I never regret it.

This guy should man up, grab an iced coffee, and 2 afternoons of the trip, power through, without a tantrum, to do something fun with the kids. Not sure why this is controversial.

It's so weird how you didn't read the OP either. No where did OP say that he wouldn't skip his nap, ever. In fact OP talks about his behaviour when he does skip naps, so clearly he does sometimes.


I’m not sure if you think you’ll convince me with semantics, but if we’re being adults and not trolling we understand that an angry husband throwing tantrums is not the same as explicitly refusing to move his nap, but is the same thing.


She said nothing about throwing a tantrum or refusing to move a nap. We know she said:” if we don’t head back to the hotel, he slogs between 4-dinner time.”



Change the narrative anyway you want - we all know he’s a dud and not much of a dad, and if he’s this much of a tool on vacay he’s probably a nightmare at home.


I’m not the one changing the narrative. I am taking the narrative directly.
Anonymous
Get him tested for sleep apnea
Anonymous
Look, OP, I think only you can put this in context. For me, I think my husband - as a rule - makes good decisions and tries to be fair to me as his wife. So if he wants to nap daily on vacation (he does), I trust that he needs it and isn’t trying to somehow screw me over, and accordingly, I accommodate it and happily enjoy some QT with my kids solo. I view it as a win-win and frankly, don’t want alone time away from my kids on vacation in the first place. I think in a marriage, sometimes I do more and sometimes he does more and over 50 years it evens out.

But if you feel like your spouse doesn’t make good decisions and isn’t trying to be an equal partner - then that is the real problem.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Look, OP, I think only you can put this in context. For me, I think my husband - as a rule - makes good decisions and tries to be fair to me as his wife. So if he wants to nap daily on vacation (he does), I trust that he needs it and isn’t trying to somehow screw me over, and accordingly, I accommodate it and happily enjoy some QT with my kids solo. I view it as a win-win and frankly, don’t want alone time away from my kids on vacation in the first place. I think in a marriage, sometimes I do more and sometimes he does more and over 50 years it evens out.

But if you feel like your spouse doesn’t make good decisions and isn’t trying to be an equal partner - then that is the real problem.


An excellent summation that cuts out the details that all the trolls are getting wound up about.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Get him tested for sleep apnea


This is the super obvious thing. No adult should be that desperate for sleep during the day unless he’s got a sleeping issue.
Anonymous
Plan the days with a mix of activities. If you’re at a hotel, he can nap while you read and the kids swim. If you’re at SeaWorld, he will just have to leave and Uber to the hotel to rest while you all finish the day. His loss.

You can take your time to read outside at the fire pit at night or take a walk in the mornings. Don’t want to be away from time with the kids? That’s your choice and he obviously feels differently about using his time for that.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Plan the days with a mix of activities. If you’re at a hotel, he can nap while you read and the kids swim. If you’re at SeaWorld, he will just have to leave and Uber to the hotel to rest while you all finish the day. His loss.

You can take your time to read outside at the fire pit at night or take a walk in the mornings. Don’t want to be away from time with the kids? That’s your choice and he obviously feels differently about using his time for that.


Great - now how do you explain to the kids that dad doesn’t want to go to sea world with them? That’s the troubling part of all this - it’s the kids who want their dad. The wife wants a break, but the kids want their dad.
Anonymous
I’m napping/resting right now on vacation. It’s wonderful!! DH took one teen to play golf and the others are content to do their own thing.
Anonymous
Maybe he would think it's unfair to him bc he is on vacation too. Just let him rest and do something else. Let go and relax.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Maybe he would think it's unfair to him bc he is on vacation too. Just let him rest and do something else. Let go and relax.


Unless she wants a nap too.
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