Ladies, do you have your own 'emergency' account?

[Anonymous]

I just got a grilling from my mom bc I don't have my 'own' account with my 'own' money. It started over some inheritance money she gave me which I asked her if she would just hold on to it until September for when we'll need to purchase some plane tickets. Anyway long story short, she says I should open my own account (in my name) to deposit the money into. She says a woman should have her own money to take care of herself and children should anything happen.

I currently stay at home, but even when I was working full time I had no such account.. All of our money wasp oiled together. I don't feel right keeping the money for 'myself.'. Thoughts?

BTW, I haven't mentioned this to my husband yet as I'm visiting my mom right now... This just started yesterday.

[Anonymous]

Yup. My grandmother and my mother had accounts too. I keep half our savings in there and half in joint savings. Has the side benefit of making it harder to spend.

[Anonymous]

Of course

[Anonymous]

No. We hold everything jointly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yup. My grandmother and my mother had accounts too. I keep half our savings in there and half in joint savings. Has the side benefit of making it harder to spend.

But is the account with half your savings in your name only? Do you only have access to it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yup. My grandmother and my mother had accounts too. I keep half our savings in there and half in joint savings. Has the side benefit of making it harder to spend.

But is the account with half your savings in your name only? Do you only have access to it?

Yup

[Anonymous]

If I was going to have my own account, I would expect my husband to do the same. We have made a decision to hold everything jointly (other than 401(k)s obviously, but we each have a right to the other's 401(k)).

[Anonymous]

Yes...not much in it but at least it is peace of mind.

[Anonymous]

No, of course not. Other than 401k. Then again, there is no way I would ever allow myself to be completely financially dependent on someone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I was going to have my own account, I would expect my husband to do the same. We have made a decision to hold everything jointly (other than 401(k)s obviously, but we each have a right to the other's 401(k)).

Yes my thoughts, too, but my mom mad me feel so bad about it I just had to get others' opinions.

[Anonymous]

My husband and I each have our own accounts - nothing joint. We each are responsible for certain bills based on our respective salaries. We also each contribute certain amount to college savings and our joint retirement account. I canNOT imagine having him see what I spend on certain things, nor can he (we've discussed). We've managed this way for 12 years, 3 kids, years of tuition - have NEVER fought about money - ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I each have our own accounts - nothing joint. We each are responsible for certain bills based on our respective salaries. We also each contribute certain amount to college savings and our joint retirement account. I canNOT imagine having him see what I spend on certain things, nor can he (we've discussed). We've managed this way for 12 years, 3 kids, years of tuition - have NEVER fought about money - ever.

I can respect the choice when its made in an open and equitable fashion. I have my own account because I don't balance my checkbook - never have - but my wife does. Sharing a checking account drove her bonko. Otherwise all our assets are joint and shared. I get the concept of having a slush fund of a few grand so you can pamper yourself here or there but the concept of squirreling away money secretly.... It's a fucking marriage....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I each have our own accounts - nothing joint. We each are responsible for certain bills based on our respective salaries. We also each contribute certain amount to college savings and our joint retirement account. I canNOT imagine having him see what I spend on certain things, nor can he (we've discussed). We've managed this way for 12 years, 3 kids, years of tuition - have NEVER fought about money - ever.

Shrug. We have everything joint and have never had a fight about money.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I do. I learned the hard way.

[Anonymous]

We have most of our money joint, but each have a savings account in our name only that could be used in some extenuating circumstance (someone's assets get frozen or something). We both have access to each other's accounts and we think of the money as "ours", its just a precautionary set up.