Jen Hatmaker

[Anonymous]

I do have to admit her back to school post is always relatable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this kind of "confessing" is a pretty well known defense mechanism and think it can be very reinforcing. I admit my embarrassing behavior and put it out there publicly for you, I mock myself. In doing so I look self aware, i am in on the joke and shaping the story, and I can indulge my wish that by doing so, by mocking myself, you will judge me less harshly. I am also funny and charming, so you may find me endearing, we can maybe bond around it, etc. And I can feel less crappy about what I did and maybe even not think about it because your support gave me a little dopamine hit and I feel better. I am ok...Underneath it, there was often guilt and shame, but it got projected and i got my goodies from someone else to feel better. It's a very common, human thing to do.

I don't think it contributes to thinking more deeply or learning though, that's the problem. It has a, "oh well....this is how we are" quality that does not really allow for a whole lot of change, because you are not really thinking about why you might do that, if you want to change it, etc. It seems emotionally lazy. That's my issue with that kind of post.

I think you’re right — but what happens in her “confessions” is that her fan girls fall all over themselves to normalize, accept and defend toxic or harmful behavior.

She gained a lot of viral fame for writing her missives about the end of school year and basically refusing to hold herself or children accountable for assignments, permission slips, etc. While her writing style can be humorous, I saw teachers comment that end of year is hard for everyone and losing parent support sucks for them — and her followers bullied those women into silence.

Same when she made the bizarre post about her son’s graduation. He got up in the middle of the ceremony and walked out and she thought it was funny and “so him” and when people said it felt disrespectful it was quickly shut up.

This is just middle age Mean Girls with #blessed yeti cups.

Oh my stars . . . there is more than one way to celebrate something! Bless y'all's hearts!

Hell, none of us wanted to be at DD's HS graduation years ago. We lost both her dad and my dad in the same month, right before DD turned 18 and graduated.

DD **BEGGED** us to not make a big deal about graduation - she hated HS and just wanted to be done. She would have loved it if we just let them mail her diploma.

In hindsight, I wish I had encouraged her to just keep walking after receiving her diploma (or after her only friend received hers, to soothe all the "support the other students" sayers).

As it was, I was fending off queries about a graduation party for months prior, and months after.

SHE.
DID.
NOT.
WANT.
ONE.

From the vantage point of parenting a 21 year old, none of this will appear on anyone's permanent record - there really is not a permanent folder somewhere.

And I would rather be or know someone who loses their $h!t over a board game, than one who chooses to be catty and speculative about someone across the country they have never met, but are going to roll around in that person's personal misery for entertainment anyway.

You're commenting about her on an anonymous forum... You are just as catty and speculative as everyone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do have to admit her back to school post is always relatable.

Agree. I love her school posts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this kind of "confessing" is a pretty well known defense mechanism and think it can be very reinforcing. I admit my embarrassing behavior and put it out there publicly for you, I mock myself. In doing so I look self aware, i am in on the joke and shaping the story, and I can indulge my wish that by doing so, by mocking myself, you will judge me less harshly. I am also funny and charming, so you may find me endearing, we can maybe bond around it, etc. And I can feel less crappy about what I did and maybe even not think about it because your support gave me a little dopamine hit and I feel better. I am ok...Underneath it, there was often guilt and shame, but it got projected and i got my goodies from someone else to feel better. It's a very common, human thing to do.

I don't think it contributes to thinking more deeply or learning though, that's the problem. It has a, "oh well....this is how we are" quality that does not really allow for a whole lot of change, because you are not really thinking about why you might do that, if you want to change it, etc. It seems emotionally lazy. That's my issue with that kind of post.

I think you’re right — but what happens in her “confessions” is that her fan girls fall all over themselves to normalize, accept and defend toxic or harmful behavior.

She gained a lot of viral fame for writing her missives about the end of school year and basically refusing to hold herself or children accountable for assignments, permission slips, etc. While her writing style can be humorous, I saw teachers comment that end of year is hard for everyone and losing parent support sucks for them — and her followers bullied those women into silence.

Same when she made the bizarre post about her son’s graduation. He got up in the middle of the ceremony and walked out and she thought it was funny and “so him” and when people said it felt disrespectful it was quickly shut up.

This is just middle age Mean Girls with #blessed yeti cups.

Oh my stars . . . there is more than one way to celebrate something! Bless y'all's hearts!

Hell, none of us wanted to be at DD's HS graduation years ago. We lost both her dad and my dad in the same month, right before DD turned 18 and graduated.

DD **BEGGED** us to not make a big deal about graduation - she hated HS and just wanted to be done. She would have loved it if we just let them mail her diploma.

In hindsight, I wish I had encouraged her to just keep walking after receiving her diploma (or after her only friend received hers, to soothe all the "support the other students" sayers).

As it was, I was fending off queries about a graduation party for months prior, and months after.

SHE.
DID.
NOT.
WANT.
ONE.

From the vantage point of parenting a 21 year old, none of this will appear on anyone's permanent record - there really is not a permanent folder somewhere.

And I would rather be or know someone who loses their $h!t over a board game, than one who chooses to be catty and speculative about someone across the country they have never met, but are going to roll around in that person's personal misery for entertainment anyway.

You're commenting about her on an anonymous forum... You are just as catty and speculative as everyone else.

Oh my stars... stop it. You’re on an anonymous forum on the internet with that faux-concern and chiding. Pass.

Let me guess. You aren’t in DC either.

[Anonymous]

interesting in his stories tonight dave hollis said he considers his home church austin new church

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:interesting in his stories tonight dave hollis said he considers his home church austin new church

BH posted on his stories a biker church captioned “church.” A lot of people on Reddit were speculating he has given up the faith and that’s why JH called it quits.

His IG is pretty sad, actually. And the amount of thirsty women in his comments is vomit emoji.

[Anonymous]

People trying to link Hollis and Hatmaker based on geography and wishful thinking are idiots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:interesting in his stories tonight dave hollis said he considers his home church austin new church

BH posted on his stories a biker church captioned “church.” A lot of people on Reddit were speculating he has given up the faith and that’s why JH called it quits.

His IG is pretty sad, actually. And the amount of thirsty women in his comments is vomit emoji.

Would you share where you are seeing this on Reddit please? I am finding very little info regarding the split. Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People trying to link Hollis and Hatmaker based on geography and wishful thinking are idiots.

I mean... divorce filings within days, a formerly close relationship, very close physical proximity. It isn't the most off base thing I could imagine. But there is no way BH could be THAT stupid. Rachel Hollis is the bottom of the barrel.

From Reddit -- someone asked Rachel on her instagram and she denied it before deleting the whole thing. Even Dave responded. https://www.reddit.com/r/blogsnark/comments/j518zz/selfhelp_inspirational_influencers_1041010_rachel/

[Anonymous]

Her post about selling the lake house was tough. If you’ve been through a divorce, that’s the real shit right there, and it doesn’t stop. It all hurts.

I don’t care what you say, Brandon did something awful. If he’s on the outside of friend and family, all alone, it’s dark.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Her post about selling the lake house was tough. If you’ve been through a divorce, that’s the real shit right there, and it doesn’t stop. It all hurts.

I don’t care what you say, Brandon did something awful. If he’s on the outside of friend and family, all alone, it’s dark.

I wonder why she is selling and so quickly. Cash to pay a settlement?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Her post about selling the lake house was tough. If you’ve been through a divorce, that’s the real shit right there, and it doesn’t stop. It all hurts.

I don’t care what you say, Brandon did something awful. If he’s on the outside of friend and family, all alone, it’s dark.

I wonder why she is selling and so quickly. Cash to pay a settlement?

I was wondering the same. She earns a fortune I assumed and Austin is reasonably priced so her cost of living is not insane even with all those teens.

[Anonymous]

I found the lake house on Zillow. Nice!!

[Anonymous]

https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/10/dear-prudence-friend-shame-relationship-high-school-coach.html

"I am a 43-year-old man, married with three kids. I’ve been a minister in the United Methodist Church for 20 years, and I was raised in a very conservative home. I had no idea that coming out was even possible when I was a child. When I went to college, I saw many others come out, but I knew I would lose my family if I tried it. Before we got married, I told my wife about my orientation, and she was willing to give things a shot anyway. Even after 20 years of marriage, I feel like I wake up every morning and live a lie. Last year the UMC ruled that clergy who are even simply attracted to the same sex are not welcome. This is the church that raised and shaped me. I knew I had to do something and told my wife, who agreed that it was time for me to be me, whatever that meant for us as a couple, and no matter how hard it might be. Oddly enough, my daughter came out at the same time (we reassured her that she is surrounded and loved just as much as ever). I left my ministry in the summer and have gone back to school. I’ve also told several close friends and have started counseling. At some point my family is going to need to find out. But I’m so afraid of being cut off forever. My counselor has helped me to realize how unhealthy my upbringing was, but that desire for connection, that desire to be loved and accepted by Mom and Dad is still there. Do I just rip the Band-Aid off, or do I continue to pretend until they pass (which could be today or 25 years from now)?"

uhhhh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/10/dear-prudence-friend-shame-relationship-high-school-coach.html

"I am a 43-year-old man, married with three kids. I’ve been a minister in the United Methodist Church for 20 years, and I was raised in a very conservative home. I had no idea that coming out was even possible when I was a child. When I went to college, I saw many others come out, but I knew I would lose my family if I tried it. Before we got married, I told my wife about my orientation, and she was willing to give things a shot anyway. Even after 20 years of marriage, I feel like I wake up every morning and live a lie. Last year the UMC ruled that clergy who are even simply attracted to the same sex are not welcome. This is the church that raised and shaped me. I knew I had to do something and told my wife, who agreed that it was time for me to be me, whatever that meant for us as a couple, and no matter how hard it might be. Oddly enough, my daughter came out at the same time (we reassured her that she is surrounded and loved just as much as ever). I left my ministry in the summer and have gone back to school. I’ve also told several close friends and have started counseling. At some point my family is going to need to find out. But I’m so afraid of being cut off forever. My counselor has helped me to realize how unhealthy my upbringing was, but that desire for connection, that desire to be loved and accepted by Mom and Dad is still there. Do I just rip the Band-Aid off, or do I continue to pretend until they pass (which could be today or 25 years from now)?"

uhhhh

What does that have to do with anything?