I absolutely hate the way my 13yoDD dresses

[Anonymous]

Kid =ked

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you should also dress exactly as she dresses. Tell her that you admire her style and want to twin with her. You can bet that she will straighten out in 5 minutes.

I know a dad who did this. When his teenage girls started wearing booty shorts, so did he. “We’re showing off butts? Great, I work out, let’s all show ‘em off”. Then tried to get a matching set of family shorts with their last name across the butt.

I was pretty irritated because I know he wouldn’t have had a problem if they were boys (and in fact I know in his younger days, he and his friends would wear booty shorts when they worked out together as some sort of weird bro bonding thing), but I have to admit it was nice seeing his very muscular butt hanging out, ha.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Meh. I've not seen a well dressed teen in this area once in the whole of the past 15 years.

This. It just is what it is. They want to dress like their friends. When I was a teen, people hiked one or both sweat pants legs up to their knees. It was all stupid, and yet everyone did it.

I think it's really expected that teen girls are going to dress like this. If it were a 30 year old woman, I would find it shocking. But not teens. If that makes sense.

You can set boundaries on coverage. No butt cheeks out in public except maybe the beach. But I'd chill on the style aspect. She will find her way as she grows older.

[Anonymous]

I would take her on a shopping trip with a stylist to pull more flattering outfits. Maybe once she sees how good she can look in other options, she won't wear the trashy stuff?

[Anonymous]

My parents pulled the whole “you’re not going out of the house dressed like THAT, young lady!” thing on me.

Joke was on them. I went in the extreme opposite direction to look as unappealing as possible. Shaved my head, wore only baggy clothes from the boys section, painted weird stripes across my face with face paint (since makeup wasn’t allowed), wore tons of old military gear from the surplus store. Rumors started flying around the other parents that I was on drugs and that I was trans. My parents FREAKED. My grandmother would cry every time she saw me. Suddenly a spaghetti strap tank top didn’t seem so bad. I remember them finally agreeing to take me shopping for more normal clothes and not batting an eye when I picked out short-shorts.

Not sure why we keep enforcing this double standard for girls. No one freaks out when a boy goes shirtless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meh. I've not seen a well dressed teen in this area once in the whole of the past 15 years.

This. It just is what it is. They want to dress like their friends. When I was a teen, people hiked one or both sweat pants legs up to their knees. It was all stupid, and yet everyone did it.

I think it's really expected that teen girls are going to dress like this. If it were a 30 year old woman, I would find it shocking. But not teens. If that makes sense.

You can set boundaries on coverage. No butt cheeks out in public except maybe the beach. But I'd chill on the style aspect. She will find her way as she grows older.

The dumb things we wear as teens….I remember the guys used to cut the sleeves off of t-shirts and wear the sleeve on their head. It was SO STUPID. But at the time it was a way to get around the “no hats” rule.

[Anonymous]

Mom of boys here. Wanted to say that I would never let my sons out of the house shirtless or with boxers showing etc. My sons being Shirtless/short shorts while being active like running is another matter, just like a girl can wear her sports bra and underwear short shorts while running.

[Anonymous]

Hi my mom from 30 years ago. I think it’s normal for teens to dress in ways that adults find ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow! What kind of parenting is happening that a 13 yr old has the balls to be so disrespectful?

Sorry. This is the kid you raised. This is directly the result of how much effort you put in the parenting from 0-13.

Don't be a dick. Storming upstairs is what 13 year olds do. Trying to find their style and self-expression is also what kids do.

[Anonymous]

It's a phase. I hate it, too, but it is practically all that's available in the stores. Maybe a sign of hope ... this year, I've seen "mom shorts," following the trend of mom jeans, and they are a lot less revealing than the short, tight, ripped types from last summer (though those are still around).

[Anonymous]

There’s a huge difference between ugly clothes and revealing/tight clothes.

Gigantic t-shirts: whatever

Tight and short shorts: forbidden

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is dressing trashy. And stomps off when it is pointed out. Disrespectful.

Getting good grades is a normal expectation from all kids. This is not something worth getting a nobel prize for. And it does not absolve her of disrespectful behavior.

PP, are you currently a parent of a teen girl? I guess not because they ALL are dressing trashy these days. Crop tops are in, and so are tight shorts with oversized Ts that do look like there're no pants underneath.
OP, I hear you. I let my teen wear those 'trashy' outfits as long as she's not wearing them to school/events/family gatherings. If she wants to wear them to go to Starbucks with her friends, so be it.

Yes, all teen girls are dressing trashy these days... boys love it!

and the trendy lesbians too!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She is beautiful and has a lovely figure (she is a dancer and swimmer). I feel like the shorts and crop tops look trashy honestly. I would never say this to her. I say things like "too revealing" or "too mature." I bought a couple of "tasteful" crop tops at the beginning of the season at her begging and hoping that that would shut her up. It didn't and she has since bought several more at Target with her own money. After purchasing yet another couple today at Target with friends, I told her "I think that's enough crop tops." She was horribly offended and stormed upstairs.

I'm in the same boat, OP. I feel for you! I feel like there is nothing I can do though to make her change. The best thing was when her summer CIT job told them they couldn't wear crop tops, so I said that she basically can't wear any of the clothes in her closet. It's good when someone else tells them they can't wear short shorts or crop tops! That's what they need to hear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is dressing trashy. And stomps off when it is pointed out. Disrespectful.

Getting good grades is a normal expectation from all kids. This is not something worth getting a nobel prize for. And it does not absolve her of disrespectful behavior.

PP, are you currently a parent of a teen girl? I guess not because they ALL are dressing trashy these days. Crop tops are in, and so are tight shorts with oversized Ts that do look like there're no pants underneath.
OP, I hear you. I let my teen wear those 'trashy' outfits as long as she's not wearing them to school/events/family gatherings. If she wants to wear them to go to Starbucks with her friends, so be it.

DP.. I'm a parent of a 13 yr old girl, and though she wants to wear super short shorts and crop tops, I don't let her. Yes, I don't "LET" her.

I know that she sometimes will rollup the shorts and tie up her shirt to make them shorter when she leaves the house, but that doesn't mean that I have to "accept" her doing so.

We have had a talk about why it's not appropriate to dress that way at this age. Yes, I know "all" 13 yr olds dress that way (not all, but a lot, but this came from my 13 yr old).

I also don't let her wear makeup right now or stay up too late. She's 13, not 16.

How far should we as a society push boundaries? Should we let 10 yr olds wear heavy makeup and crop tops?

There are certain things that I caved on, like letting her have a smartphone at 11, though initially, I swore I would not do it. But letting my 13 yr old dress trashy is non negotiable.

[Anonymous]

I hate the way 90% of teen girls dress. They look like street walkers but not my circus, not my monkeys.