The All Boys School Conundrum

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes geography (of the school and the area) plays into the racial makeup of the school too. Not everyone is interested in 1hr+ commutes to school. Take a look at the racial makeup of the area, and note the school locations. Some of your answers are found there. Not all, of course.

https://www.dcpolicycenter.org/publications/regional-demographic-shifts/

Your argument is there are not enough black boys in DC?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any all-boys school in this area that isn't a lightning rod for criticism by seemingly everyone on this message board? There are 18 receent pages as of now dedicated to STA's anti-equality issues. On any other given day it could easily be trashing Landon , Prep, or Gonzaga. If someone wants to send their daughter to an all-girls school, it seems to be praised as giving these girls a place to "shine, take center stage, and fill every role", but the boys' schools are more often criticized than applauded. Why is this? And what is a parent to do around here if they seek an all-boy education for their son? Is it like this with all boys' schools in other cities?

NP. I think the problems have increased in recent years because Conservative parents that want to send their kid to an elite school are choosing the all boys schools over schools such as Sidwell, GDS, or Maret because they deem those schools to be too liberal and quite frankly I think they think they are too diverse – too many black and Jewish families for them. So the more conservative all boys schools become their first choice and they get admitted. Many are nice normal families but many bring with them their conservative views which can be racist, anti Jewish/Muslim, and against LGBTQ. The most egregious incidents of racism and acts against Jewish students were done by very conservative students. It is documented and true.

Can you cite where this is all "documented and true"? Only documented incident I recall was the swastika at Sidwell's student meeting. But I'm sure your vast knowledge of all the local schools can produce a ton of documentation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dcum is not real life. I wouldn’t let anything here impact your real world decisions.

The Instagram posts about racism in these schools are real though, and recent dcum discussions center on those posts. There are many lovely all-boys schools in the country. I’m not sure why the ones in dc seem particularly problematic on matters of race.

I'd guess it's because we just know more about the local schools. I went to an all boys HS for two years and can attest that without the presence of girls, boys unleash their inner lord of the flies. The racism is probably just how it expresses here, since our community is diverse. Are these lovely all boys schools you mention overwhelming white already?

Can't speak to the other schools mentioned in this thread, but St. Anselm's appears to have a real commitment to racial and economic diversity.

37% students of color at SAAS, actually pretty low for this area. So appears is probably the right word to use here.

Please note that I said that school has a commitment to racial and economic diversity. I'll evaluate my assumptions on the question of racial diversity, but just looking at my son's class, the percentage is higher than 37.

DP: Interestingly, for a school not many people talk about around here, it is one of only four all boys schools ranked in the top 10 in the nation that gets an A rating for diversity.

[Anonymous]

If you think all boys is right for your son, then go visit them all and find the best match for him. Don't worry about what anyone else says.

It's not like you won't be judged by your neighbors for choosing private over public anyway. Do what works for you.

That said - take what you have heard from this board (and others) - both good and bad - and see for yourself whether it applies to you or not. I have always found in the past when I hear parents talk about which teachers are good/bad, that often it didn't play out in my own experience. We've had great teachers that others said were bad. This includes a teacher that people said "liked girls and disliked boys", who loved my son and was really great with him. They just had their own bad experience and it didn't translate to "everyone".

Also remember, that some of the things that negative reports of things related to all boys school culture, can be overcome by your family's culture at home. Similarly, many of the negative things at the school may be the result of the "home culture" for those specific children's families. So if you are worried about these things, you have the power to affect them.

Good luck in your search - I'm sure you'll find a great fit. You clearly care and are doing your homework.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jealousy. Miserable sucky things are celebrated and coddled. Strong, attractive things with vitality and low numbers of mental illness diagnosis are attacked.

Happens in all walks of life.

What on earth are you muttering

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any all-boys school in this area that isn't a lightning rod for criticism by seemingly everyone on this message board? There are 18 receent pages as of now dedicated to STA's anti-equality issues. On any other given day it could easily be trashing Landon , Prep, or Gonzaga. If someone wants to send their daughter to an all-girls school, it seems to be praised as giving these girls a place to "shine, take center stage, and fill every role", but the boys' schools are more often criticized than applauded. Why is this? And what is a parent to do around here if they seek an all-boy education for their son? Is it like this with all boys' schools in other cities?

NP. I think the problems have increased in recent years because Conservative parents that want to send their kid to an elite school are choosing the all boys schools over schools such as Sidwell, GDS, or Maret because they deem those schools to be too liberal and quite frankly I think they think they are too diverse – too many black and Jewish families for them. So the more conservative all boys schools become their first choice and they get admitted. Many are nice normal families but many bring with them their conservative views which can be racist, anti Jewish/Muslim, and against LGBTQ. The most egregious incidents of racism and acts against Jewish students were done by very conservative students. It is documented and true.

Can you cite where this is all "documented and true"? Only documented incident I recall was the swastika at Sidwell's student meeting. But I'm sure your vast knowledge of all the local schools can produce a ton of documentation.

Wow. The least knowledgeable always sound the most confident. You need to do some research. Start with the boys who thought photoshopping the faces of diverse classmates on Holocaust victims was funny... two years ago. That is just the beginning of the many documented things you don’t know about, despite knowing everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dcum is not real life. I wouldn’t let anything here impact your real world decisions.

The Instagram posts about racism in these schools are real though, and recent dcum discussions center on those posts. There are many lovely all-boys schools in the country. I’m not sure why the ones in dc seem particularly problematic on matters of race.

I'd guess it's because we just know more about the local schools. I went to an all boys HS for two years and can attest that without the presence of girls, boys unleash their inner lord of the flies. The racism is probably just how it expresses here, since our community is diverse. Are these lovely all boys schools you mention overwhelming white already?

Can't speak to the other schools mentioned in this thread, but St. Anselm's appears to have a real commitment to racial and economic diversity.

37% students of color at SAAS, actually pretty low for this area. So appears is probably the right word to use here.

Please note that I said that school has a commitment to racial and economic diversity. I'll evaluate my assumptions on the question of racial diversity, but just looking at my son's class, the percentage is higher than 37.

DP: Interestingly, for a school not many people talk about around here, it is one of only four all boys schools ranked in the top 10 in the nation that gets an A rating for diversity.

I like SAAS but I wouldn’t put it in the top 10 in the nation. I assume that is using the Jay Mathews AP weighted ranking

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jealousy. Miserable sucky things are celebrated and coddled. Strong, attractive things with vitality and low numbers of mental illness diagnosis are attacked.

Happens in all walks of life.

not sure this is correct, but it made me laugh, nonetheless!

[Anonymous]

OP what’s your point? Why do you GAF what people say? My son is applying to several schools that had some concerns about toxic masculinity etc and he’s kind and so nice. And all of his friends who went to these schools are really nice.

Why do you listen to people trashing these schools? Don’t be a sheep. It’s not like your son is going to join the klan after going to one of them. He’ll likely be athletic and get a good education and make lasting friendships in a rigorous academic environment. Usually they profess to understand boys as well.

[Anonymous]

Some of the schools OP mentioned are affiliated with a specific religion. Gonzaga and GP are likely going to have a similar diversity of the K-8 parochial schools. Low. Although, they are, in fact, higher in diversity than the K-8 schools collectively (maybe not individual schools).

I have heard good and bad about almost every school in this area. And to your point about girls schools versus boys schools - maybe I am on an island but my experience as an only girl and parent to both genders, this seems very reasonable to me. Although take a look at the thread on Stone Ridge and you will find the girl's schools are without their detractors also.

Good luck OP and thanks for this thread. I may have to convince DS to do one more application to St Anselms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any all-boys school in this area that isn't a lightning rod for criticism by seemingly everyone on this message board? There are 18 receent pages as of now dedicated to STA's anti-equality issues. On any other given day it could easily be trashing Landon , Prep, or Gonzaga. If someone wants to send their daughter to an all-girls school, it seems to be praised as giving these girls a place to "shine, take center stage, and fill every role", but the boys' schools are more often criticized than applauded. Why is this? And what is a parent to do around here if they seek an all-boy education for their son? Is it like this with all boys' schools in other cities?

NP. I think the problems have increased in recent years because Conservative parents that want to send their kid to an elite school are choosing the all boys schools over schools such as Sidwell, GDS, or Maret because they deem those schools to be too liberal and quite frankly I think they think they are too diverse – too many black and Jewish families for them. So the more conservative all boys schools become their first choice and they get admitted. Many are nice normal families but many bring with them their conservative views which can be racist, anti Jewish/Muslim, and against LGBTQ. The most egregious incidents of racism and acts against Jewish students were done by very conservative students. It is documented and true.

Can you cite where this is all "documented and true"? Only documented incident I recall was the swastika at Sidwell's student meeting. But I'm sure your vast knowledge of all the local schools can produce a ton of documentation.

Wow. The least knowledgeable always sound the most confident. You need to do some research. Start with the boys who thought photoshopping the faces of diverse classmates on Holocaust victims was funny... two years ago. That is just the beginning of the many documented things you don’t know about, despite knowing everything.

Oddly, the only thing that comes up on the internet about photoshop of faces in a local private school is another post in this forum. Likely also from you and your false accusations. But I'm sure you are well aware of everything that goes on in all the other schools so keep posting your BS. Fool.

[Anonymous]

Some of the schools OP mentioned are affiliated with a specific religion. Gonzaga and GP are likely going to have a similar diversity of the K-8 parochial schools. Low. Although, they are, in fact, higher in diversity than the K-8 schools collectively (maybe not individual schools).

I have heard good and bad about almost every school in this area. And to your point about girls schools versus boys schools - maybe I am on an island but my experience as an only girl and parent to both genders, this seems very reasonable to me. Although take a look at the thread on Stone Ridge and you will find the girl's schools are without their detractors also.

Good luck OP and thanks for this thread. I may have to convince DS to do one more application to St Anselms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP what’s your point? Why do you GAF what people say? My son is applying to several schools that had some concerns about toxic masculinity etc and he’s kind and so nice. And all of his friends who went to these schools are really nice.

Why do you listen to people trashing these schools? Don’t be a sheep. It’s not like your son is going to join the klan after going to one of them. He’ll likely be athletic and get a good education and make lasting friendships in a rigorous academic environment. Usually they profess to understand boys as well.

Actually two friends’ sons have become alternative right after starting at one of these schools. Peers are more influential than parents. They started watching Ben Shapiro and other right wing shows casually with friends and now they are full blown right wing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes geography (of the school and the area) plays into the racial makeup of the school too. Not everyone is interested in 1hr+ commutes to school. Take a look at the racial makeup of the area, and note the school locations. Some of your answers are found there. Not all, of course.

https://www.dcpolicycenter.org/publications/regional-demographic-shifts/

Your argument is there are not enough black boys in DC?

Reading comprehension and critical thinking not your strong suit?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes geography (of the school and the area) plays into the racial makeup of the school too. Not everyone is interested in 1hr+ commutes to school. Take a look at the racial makeup of the area, and note the school locations. Some of your answers are found there. Not all, of course.

https://www.dcpolicycenter.org/publications/regional-demographic-shifts/

Your argument is there are not enough black boys in DC?

Reading comprehension and critical thinking not your strong suit?

https://www.dcpolicycenter.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/Race-50km-2017.png

Look at the map. Good grief. If you are AA, and live among the "green dots", what are the chances you want to drive the distance to, say, Landon--probably an hour or more every day?

I have a kid at bullis, which is arguably more diverse than most (and not part of this thread since it's co-ed). They have a bus that comes from the "green dot" area, and my kid tells me about what his friends go through to attend Bullis. Getting up by or before 5:00am, home after 8 or 9 sometimes. It's hard, and not everyone is willing to do it.