The All Boys School Conundrum

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Single sex education has its advantages and disadvantages. I would try to find some academic research, even though the social sciences are admittedly undergoing a duplication problem. If your child is hip to it and you have the money the schools you’ve mentioned are world class.

When we looked into it, seems a pretty famous study said it benefited girls more due (likely) to cultural reasons. I.e girls trying to hide their light to please the boys. More options for leadership as well. Not sure at any of these elite schools this is really much of a problem. Girls seem to be encouraged more than boys these days by the culture (grrrl power and all that)...good luck.

THAT is a reach...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single sex education has its advantages and disadvantages. I would try to find some academic research, even though the social sciences are admittedly undergoing a duplication problem. If your child is hip to it and you have the money the schools you’ve mentioned are world class.

When we looked into it, seems a pretty famous study said it benefited girls more due (likely) to cultural reasons. I.e girls trying to hide their light to please the boys. More options for leadership as well. Not sure at any of these elite schools this is really much of a problem. Girls seem to be encouraged more than boys these days by the culture (grrrl power and all that)...good luck.

THAT is a reach...

It's not a reach if your world is a 10 mile radius.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jealousy. Miserable sucky things are celebrated and coddled. Strong, attractive things with vitality and low numbers of mental illness diagnosis are attacked.

Happens in all walks of life.

Huh?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single sex education has its advantages and disadvantages. I would try to find some academic research, even though the social sciences are admittedly undergoing a duplication problem. If your child is hip to it and you have the money the schools you’ve mentioned are world class.

When we looked into it, seems a pretty famous study said it benefited girls more due (likely) to cultural reasons. I.e girls trying to hide their light to please the boys. More options for leadership as well. Not sure at any of these elite schools this is really much of a problem. Girls seem to be encouraged more than boys these days by the culture (grrrl power and all that)...good luck.

THAT is a reach...

It's not a reach if your world is a 10 mile radius.

HA! Fair enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is there any all-boys school in this area that isn't a lightning rod for criticism by seemingly everyone on this message board? There are 18 receent pages as of now dedicated to STA's anti-equality issues. On any other given day it could easily be trashing Landon , Prep, or Gonzaga. If someone wants to send their daughter to an all-girls school, it seems to be praised as giving these girls a place to "shine, take center stage, and fill every role", but the boys' schools are more often criticized than applauded. Why is this? And what is a parent to do around here if they seek an all-boy education for their son? Is it like this with all boys' schools in other cities?

NP. I think the problems have increased in recent years because Conservative parents that want to send their kid to an elite school are choosing the all boys schools over schools such as Sidwell, GDS, or Maret because they deem those schools to be too liberal and quite frankly I think they think they are too diverse – too many black and Jewish families for them. So the more conservative all boys schools become their first choice and they get admitted. Many are nice normal families but many bring with them their conservative views which can be racist, anti Jewish/Muslim, and against LGBTQ. The most egregious incidents of racism and acts against Jewish students were done by very conservative students. It is documented and true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The Instagram posts about racism in these schools are real though, and recent dcum discussions center on those posts. There are many lovely all-boys schools in the country. I’m not sure why the ones in dc seem particularly problematic on matters of race.

I'd guess it's because we just know more about the local schools. I went to an all boys HS for two years and can attest that without the presence of girls, boys unleash their inner lord of the flies. The racism is probably just how it expresses here, since our community is diverse. Are these lovely all boys schools you mention overwhelming white already?
NP. I also went to all-boys school for middle and high school. Agree with Lord of the Flies comparison. No one who actually spent time in one would ever describe it as lovely. Lovely at grandparents days and for some "mother-son lunch" day they had, but otherwise more like a minimum security prison for really smart kids. There's definitely benefit in that not having girls around allows boys to act sillier and focus more. But it also allows them to act like stupid animals more often. Racism seemed no more or less a problem than it is in the wider community (ie, still a problem, but no worse than normal). Sexism and misogyny was definitely an issue. Also, lots of homophobia. I'd not send my sons to an all-boys school if there were other comparable options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any all-boys school in this area that isn't a lightning rod for criticism by seemingly everyone on this message board? There are 18 receent pages as of now dedicated to STA's anti-equality issues. On any other given day it could easily be trashing Landon , Prep, or Gonzaga. If someone wants to send their daughter to an all-girls school, it seems to be praised as giving these girls a place to "shine, take center stage, and fill every role", but the boys' schools are more often criticized than applauded. Why is this? And what is a parent to do around here if they seek an all-boy education for their son? Is it like this with all boys' schools in other cities?

NP. I think the problems have increased in recent years because Conservative parents that want to send their kid to an elite school are choosing the all boys schools over schools such as Sidwell, GDS, or Maret because they deem those schools to be too liberal and quite frankly I think they think they are too diverse – too many black and Jewish families for them. So the more conservative all boys schools become their first choice and they get admitted. Many are nice normal families but many bring with them their conservative views which can be racist, anti Jewish/Muslim, and against LGBTQ. The most egregious incidents of racism and acts against Jewish students were done by very conservative students. It is documented and true.

+ 1000

[Anonymous]

The only all boys school I would consider for my son is St. Anselm’s Abbey School.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dcum is not real life. I wouldn’t let anything here impact your real world decisions.

The Instagram posts about racism in these schools are real though, and recent dcum discussions center on those posts. There are many lovely all-boys schools in the country. I’m not sure why the ones in dc seem particularly problematic on matters of race.

I'd guess it's because we just know more about the local schools. I went to an all boys HS for two years and can attest that without the presence of girls, boys unleash their inner lord of the flies. The racism is probably just how it expresses here, since our community is diverse. Are these lovely all boys schools you mention overwhelming white already?

Can't speak to the other schools mentioned in this thread, but St. Anselm's appears to have a real commitment to racial and economic diversity.

37% students of color at SAAS, actually pretty low for this area. So appears is probably the right word to use here.

[Anonymous]

Can someone share more info on the culture at DeMatha?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any all-boys school in this area that isn't a lightning rod for criticism by seemingly everyone on this message board? There are 18 receent pages as of now dedicated to STA's anti-equality issues. On any other given day it could easily be trashing Landon , Prep, or Gonzaga. If someone wants to send their daughter to an all-girls school, it seems to be praised as giving these girls a place to "shine, take center stage, and fill every role", but the boys' schools are more often criticized than applauded. Why is this? And what is a parent to do around here if they seek an all-boy education for their son? Is it like this with all boys' schools in other cities?

NP. I think the problems have increased in recent years because Conservative parents that want to send their kid to an elite school are choosing the all boys schools over schools such as Sidwell, GDS, or Maret because they deem those schools to be too liberal and quite frankly I think they think they are too diverse – too many black and Jewish families for them. So the more conservative all boys schools become their first choice and they get admitted. Many are nice normal families but many bring with them their conservative views which can be racist, anti Jewish/Muslim, and against LGBTQ. The most egregious incidents of racism and acts against Jewish students were done by very conservative students. It is documented and true.

Wow! This is so true in my experience.

Had so many parents at the all boys school we left but still talk to (sports) make anti-Jewish, anti lgbt, awkward racist micro aggression statements to me.

I call them out but ...

[Anonymous]

I have boys who went to Gonzaga. I have always been impressed with how the administration there handled incidents of bad behavior. (As much as the details were made public.) There are always going to be incidents of regrettable behavior in teens and how the school deals with it is most important to me. (I also have a girl who went to an all girls school and there was quite a bit of regrettable behavior there as well and the school did absolutely nothing about it, so it’s honestly not specific to boys schools.) One thing I will say about my boys’ friends at Gonzaga is that they show up for each other. Funerals, fundraisers, graduations. They are both out of high school now and forged bonds with the kids in their classes that have lasted into college and beyond. The school does a really good job of creating a sense brotherhood that lasts beyond their 4 years there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dcum is not real life. I wouldn’t let anything here impact your real world decisions.

The Instagram posts about racism in these schools are real though, and recent dcum discussions center on those posts. There are many lovely all-boys schools in the country. I’m not sure why the ones in dc seem particularly problematic on matters of race.

I'd guess it's because we just know more about the local schools. I went to an all boys HS for two years and can attest that without the presence of girls, boys unleash their inner lord of the flies. The racism is probably just how it expresses here, since our community is diverse. Are these lovely all boys schools you mention overwhelming white already?

Can't speak to the other schools mentioned in this thread, but St. Anselm's appears to have a real commitment to racial and economic diversity.

37% students of color at SAAS, actually pretty low for this area. So appears is probably the right word to use here.

Please note that I said that school has a commitment to racial and economic diversity. I'll evaluate my assumptions on the question of racial diversity, but just looking at my son's class, the percentage is higher than 37.

[Anonymous]

OP, don't come to DCUM for your information (or statistics). Visit the schools and learn first hand.

[Anonymous]

Sometimes geography (of the school and the area) plays into the racial makeup of the school too. Not everyone is interested in 1hr+ commutes to school. Take a look at the racial makeup of the area, and note the school locations. Some of your answers are found there. Not all, of course.

https://www.dcpolicycenter.org/publications/regional-demographic-shifts/