In what nuanced ways did you NOT realize you had white privilege?

[Anonymous]

On the bus. Older black men will let me get on before them, and they will offer me a seat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really freaks me out as a POC when I see white people open packages and eat things or give things to their kids to eat or to play with in stores BEFORE they pay for them. Doing that could so easily get me arrested.

I am white, and I view this as stealing no matter what your race.

Yeah, I would never do this either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really freaks me out as a POC when I see white people open packages and eat things or give things to their kids to eat or to play with in stores BEFORE they pay for them. Doing that could so easily get me arrested.

I am white, and I view this as stealing no matter what your race.

Yeah, I would never do this either.

The difference is the white person will get the stink eye from fellow WF shoppers and the black person will be accused of shoplifting by store security.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:On the bus. Older black men will let me get on before them, and they will offer me a seat.

I’m assuming you’re a woman - this is not white privilege they are just being gentlemanly

[Anonymous]

Actually, I had this thought the other day. I went into a Louis Vuitton store and they were so helpful and kind to me, fawned all over me, etc. Maybe because I was already carrying an LV bag and they could tell I might be a serious customer, but still. I saw minorities in there and wondered if they were being treated as kindly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:On the bus. Older black men will let me get on before them, and they will offer me a seat.

All of the black men I know are exceedingly polite and considerate to me, a white woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really freaks me out as a POC when I see white people open packages and eat things or give things to their kids to eat or to play with in stores BEFORE they pay for them. Doing that could so easily get me arrested.

Most white people don't do that.

Most white people who do that pay for it at the counter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mine is similar -- I've brought my own shopping bag into stores, strolled around putting a few groceries in it, and then gone to the checkout and emptied it onto the conveyor belt. Just to avoid dragging around a basket.

Pure white privilege. I've stopped doing it.

I do that too and I am asian

NP. I never do that. I’d be scared of someone accusing me of stealing.

- white woman

Another white woman who would never do that because it looks like stealing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really freaks me out as a POC when I see white people open packages and eat things or give things to their kids to eat or to play with in stores BEFORE they pay for them. Doing that could so easily get me arrested.

Most white people don't do that.

Most white people who do that pay for it at the counter.

There was that pregnant white woman who forgot to pay for a sandwich she ate while shopping, was arrested on the spot for shoplifting, and the state took custody of her 2yo. That's enough for me not to do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can literally walk into most any store and people don't wonder what I'm doing there.

I've been in some upscale boutique stores and had that reaction (I'm a size 14-16). I cannot imagine how difficult it must be going through that on a regular basis.

I'm white and UMC now, but have class markers from my LMC upbringing. There is a lot of overlap between classism and racism. The whole thing about getting a receipt, not using personal bags, and the type of store you fit in were definitely part of how I was raised. A major difference between classism and racism is the escalation of response -- a black man faces a physical danger but as a white woman, it's not.

I think a lot of white people who grew up LMC recognize these things as something they knew not to do and dismiss the racism side without realising it's "yes, and ...".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On the bus. Older black men will let me get on before them, and they will offer me a seat.

All of the black men I know are exceedingly polite and considerate to me, a white woman.

I gave up on offering my seat to white women when they demanded equality and insisted they were Strong And Independent.

[Anonymous]

I get preferential treatment. Like I get pulled over for speeding and get let off without a ticket. People give me coffee and things for free. I thought it was because I was pretty but it's because I'm pretty according to white beauty standards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mine is similar -- I've brought my own shopping bag into stores, strolled around putting a few groceries in it, and then gone to the checkout and emptied it onto the conveyor belt. Just to avoid dragging around a basket.

Pure white privilege. I've stopped doing it.

I do that too and I am asian

NP. I never do that. I’d be scared of someone accusing me of stealing.

- white woman

+1. I’m also very conscious of going straight to the returns desk when I return something. Never eaten something before paying for it either. Maybe it’s white privilege that they get away with it, but doing it in the first place is more than that — arrogance is probably the best word.

-white woman

[Anonymous]

I grew up in a very white town and moved to a Boston when I was 18. I was working for starbucks and after a few months I was promoted to shift supervisor over a young Black woman who had been working for the store for a year. I was surprised because objectively she was better at her job and knew more than I did. The manager said it was because I was always on time, which was true, but even considering the timeliness issue (and she was late very rarely) as a manger myself, the other person was clearly the better pick. At the time, I don't think I realized it was a racial preference, but in retrospect it was. The same thing happened when I worked for starbucks in Chicago and I ended up quitting-not because I was such an antiracist, but I didn't want the hours and responsibility they pushed on me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mine is similar -- I've brought my own shopping bag into stores, strolled around putting a few groceries in it, and then gone to the checkout and emptied it onto the conveyor belt. Just to avoid dragging around a basket.

Pure white privilege. I've stopped doing it.

I do that too and I am asian

NP. I never do that. I’d be scared of someone accusing me of stealing.

- white woman

+1. I’m also very conscious of going straight to the returns desk when I return something. Never eaten something before paying for it either. Maybe it’s white privilege that they get away with it, but doing it in the first place is more than that — arrogance is probably the best word.

-white woman

Agreed.