Boyfriend with strange views

[Anonymous]

Based on all your examples, he has given you plenty of reasons to rein the other direction and you clearly haven’t. Your responses also don’t indicate that you aren’t out the door, why? And why would you ever discuss moving in with someone like that in the first place when he has shown you nothing but red flags. Get some self confidence and drop this dude.

[Anonymous]

You’ve posted about him before. Didn’t you gather your courage and ask him to move in together, at which point he basically cursed you out? And you went back to him after THAT? There were other threads, too.

He is deeply dysfunctional — I wouldn’t want to spend two hours with him, let alone 2 years. But if you’re staying - and not running for your life in the other direction - then something is up with you that’s worth exploring with a therapist. Just the fact that you need validation from us that this isn’t normal, when he sounds very obviously nuts.

[Anonymous]

He’s nuts. When it’s safe, break up with him. Just distance for now. Hopefully you aren’t living with him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He’s deeply unhealthy but, op, unless you dump him asap so are you. maybe concentrate on getting your act together rather than exhaustive lists of his effed up beliefs.

This. The fact that you are with him and need to crowdsource this shows you have some serious issues and/or that you are desperate to be with someone.

[Anonymous]

He has some deep-seated problems which won't go away.

I would guess that he may have sexuality conflicts and you are his "cover" to make his life seem normal. His behavior indicates he is play-acting at an intimate relationship with you.

Reality may be that he purposely gets angry at you and shuns you for weeks at a time to go and explore his real desires … elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’ve posted about him before. Didn’t you gather your courage and ask him to move in together, at which point he basically cursed you out? And you went back to him after THAT? There were other threads, too.

He is deeply dysfunctional — I wouldn’t want to spend two hours with him, let alone 2 years. But if you’re staying - and not running for your life in the other direction - then something is up with you that’s worth exploring with a therapist. Just the fact that you need validation from us that this isn’t normal, when he sounds very obviously nuts.

NP - yes! I remember this!

[Anonymous]

RUN!!!!

[Anonymous]

I would rather be alone than desperate enough to be with a guy like this. Break up with him and find a good therapist so you can figure out whats allowing you to accept this kind of behavior, and learn how to avoid Guys like this in the future,

[Anonymous]

With these views ...you mean Ex-Boyfriend right?

[Anonymous]

You need to break up with him. He sounds nuts, so much so that I’m wondering if you’re a troll.

[Anonymous]

"Strange views"? By that I think you mean some sort of personality disorder? He's not "incorrect", he's not quite right in the head.

What exactly do you like about this crappy dude?

[Anonymous]

About the only thing I semi agree with on is shared hobbies and being able to have fun together.

He's effed up, but you need to see a therapist too.

2 years is 18 to 23 most too long no way the red flags weren't there until just recently. They were ignored.

I'm glad you're waking up to the problems. But you don't need to process and crowd source. You need to end it completely blocked on everything.

You also should consider therapy and no dating for 1 year, so you can figure out what led you to stay in this relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He has some deep-seated problems which won't go away.

I would guess that he may have sexuality conflicts and you are his "cover" to make his life seem normal. His behavior indicates he is play-acting at an intimate relationship with you.

Reality may be that he purposely gets angry at you and shuns you for weeks at a time to go and explore his real desires … elsewhere.

OP: Interesting take! I’ve also considered this. What, to you, makes it seem like he’s play-acting at an intimate relationship?

[Anonymous]

Any guy who says sex should be rare to keep it special has some major issue going on. He's either gay, or hooked on porn, or thinks he deserves someone hotter than you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Incorrect?” He’s downright crazy.

OP: Ha! Yeah, I was trying to find a gentle, non-judgemental way to say it.

Well, that's your problem. Your misguided need to be "gentle" and "non-judgmental" is screwing with your brain.

Of COURSE you should be JUDGMENTAL when picking a person you are going to date, or stay with. What is wrong with you, OP?